Thursday, December 24, 2009

New Opening Day tradition at Wrigley?

Not again! Giant Swedish Christmas goat statue gets torched

STOCKHOLM (Reuters) – Arsonists set fire early on Wednesday to a giant straw statue of the Swedish Yule goat, a forerunner to Santa Claus in Sweden, defying security measures for a third year in a row.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Alexi the boy-genius

April 22, 2208: Morningstar, Inc. named Illinois’ Bright Start College Savings Program on April 16 one of the top five college savings plans in the nation... After taking office, Illinois Treasurer Alexi Giannoulias, above, overhauled Bright Start, selecting OppenheimerFunds Inc., through a competitive bid, to manage the program, starting last July. Oppenheimer made it among the lowest-cost programs in the nation, and offered investment options that gained a higher return rate.

Woops!

Decemeber 22, 2009: The state of Illinois has reached a settlement in its lawsuit over losses in the Bright Start college savings program under which parents will get back $77.23 million — slightly more than half of what they lost in investments handled by Oppenheimer Funds Inc.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

It's phokking cold here

Smiff was complaining about 32 degrees. Well it's 0 here. 0 F, not 0 C that you're whining about. We've also got snow n $#!+. With more of both to come. So la di frickin da Smiff, your weather is positively balmy compared to da city of da Daleys. We know how to run winter up here.

Fung has his knit hat on in da office. Dat's how cold it is up in here. I knew I shouldn't have cut my hair...

Which reminds me, perhaps I should take a pic for Briggs to add to his knit hats collection. Where's the phone?

Ineptitude

So we're on pace for what, under a quarter of the number of posts in 2008? Yet we have more authors now than we did then? Wha happen? I know W is gone n all, but, was he really that instrumental to the content on this blog? No healthcare debate? No wars debate? Maybe more stats from K-Mad would inspire us, but somehow I don't think they've changed much from the last time he ran them. No Tweets? No Facebook page updates? Is everyone, like, getting a life or something? How many questions can I ask in a row?

Birthers? Palin selling a book? Blago selling a book? Daley selling annudder part of da city? Bearzzzzzzzzzz........

That's a spicy zettabyte



A report published Wednesday by the University of California, San Diego (Smiff's people? ed), calculates that American households collectively consumed 3.6 zettabytes of information in 2008.

Clearly, this chart is inaccurate. There should be a large slice of the pie going to the Lattice of Coincidence. No word as to whether we need to cut down TV or computer in order for us to lose weight.

News item: It gets cold in Chicago

News item: City parking meters freeze up

(Crain’s) — The city’s newly privatized parking meters weren’t prepared for Chicago’s first cold snap.

Some of the new parking meter kiosks operated by LAZ Parking (Ok, was that really a good choice for the name of the company? Was that the first decision they made at their first meeting around the conference table, and it all went downhill from there? Just askin... Ed.) under a controversial lease deal that has already experienced operating difficulties froze up overnight as temperatures plunged into the single digits.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Brain-Dead Americans (cont)

So I got this joke in my inbox of my emails on the Internets...

What do baby seals and Tiger Woods have in common?

They are both in danger of being beaten to death by a Norwegian with a club !

'Course, she's a SWEDE, but you know, don't let FACTS get in the way of a lame joke. Besides, who even knows the difference between Norway and Sweden? Aren't they, like, in Finland or something? No, that's Denmark...

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

How does that saying go?

Acorn doesn't fall far from the tree? Like father like son? Dollar dollar bill y'all? If it's not one thing it's another?

Wirtz lawsuit over booze tax hike holds up CTA capital dollars

Monday, November 30, 2009

LoC=Spam? (cont)

Apparently the new big thing is to post a spam comment in a post we made last year. That way if you just go to the blog you don't see it (Briggs & I saw them coz we subscribe to the RSS feed for comments), but we then become one of them spamming blogs that Google hates sooo much. So I's made a coupla changes unilateral style - no more anonymous commenting (sorry brain dead bob et al) and comments on older posts will have to be approved before posting. If anyone thinks I've overstepped my authoritah, you suck, if anyone has (a) better idea(s), you suck, and if you are a spammer, you especially suck.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Even A Caveman Can Do It

Newly signed Chargers OT Jon Runyan plans to retire after the season.
Runyan will run for Congress in New Jersey's 3rd district in 2010. "I look forward to a successful end to my career on the field," he said, "and a spirited campaign against Congressman (John) Adler." He will run as a Republican.
~

Could dis be Da Berz fate?

School Northwestern is often confused with shuts down American Football program

Monday, November 23, 2009

My new intern

Not quite ready for primetime...

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Another indication that the world is ending

The Main Stream Media says it isn't.

Is Doomsday Coming? Perhaps, but Not in 2012

Apparently, the New York Times isn't impressed that the current 5,125 year cycle of 13 bak'tuns will end on December 20, 2012. (Did the Mayans have to make the world end right before Christmas? Why did they hate Jesus?)

"If you want to worry, most scientists say, you should think about global climate change (I think this blog has successfully debunked that myth - Ed.), rogue asteroids (NOW we're talking! :-) - Ed.), or nuclear war (tried it - didn't work - Ed.)."

Why didn't I think of that?

Taiwanese online hunk lures 20 women into bed
With his dad, who turns out to be him

A Taiwanese man has been cuffed for allegedly posing online as a "youthful male model" and persuading up to 20 females to have sex with his father, the China Daily reports.

Hsu Shian-ming's internet pitch got a lively response from women "interested in romantic liaisons". The 55-year-old scammer convinced his victims that his old man was suffering from prostate cancer - a condition which meant he needed constant sex to stay alive.

The angels of mercy obliged, administering life-saving treatment to dad in various Taipei hotels. Pop's cancer was evidently serious, because the women were "persuaded into unconventional sex acts varying from putting foreign objects in their private parts, anal sex, or threesomes", the China Daily indelicately puts it.

The wheels came off the audacious ruse after one of the women failed in her attempts to meet the son.

She called in private investigators who revealed that father and son were one and the same person. Police arrested Hsu on Saturday, and a subsequent search of his house revealed "dozens" of photos of the handsome young man used as bait.

They also found "hundreds of female pictures each with detailed descriptions on the back". During his medical treatment, Hsu had photographed his victims nude, then used the snaps to "threaten them into doing future sex favours".

Hsu allegedly also relieved his targets of cash and goods to the value of 200m Taiwan New Dollars (£3,725,000).

The worst hit was "a cougar surnamed Yu", who handed over gifts including seven iPhones, a £1,862 monthly allowance, diamond and pearl necklaces, a Porsche, and a "limited-edition watch valued at a staggering £145,000".

Hsu, described by police as a "divorced bald man" and "physically unattractive", faces five years in jail on each of multiple fraud raps. ®

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Oh! For a smooth, creamy cupcake!

Monday! Syracuse 75, Albany 43
Today! Syracuse 100, Robert Morris 60

Should they be medicated?

The delicate science of ensuring that Wal-Mart shoppers don't kill you, or each other

A year after an unruly crowd trampled a worker to death at a Wal-Mart store, the nation’s retailers are preparing for another Black Friday, the blockbuster shopping day after Thanksgiving. Along with offering $300 laptops and $99 navigation devices, stores are planning new safety measures to make sure the festive day does not take another deadly turn...

Let's see, how can we destroy Thanksgiving for our employees?

The most significant change at Wal-Mart is that the majority of its discount stores (as opposed to its Supercenters) will open Thanksgiving morning at 6 a.m. and stay open through Friday evening. Last year, those stores closed Thanksgiving evening and reopened early Friday morning. By keeping the stores open for 24 hours, Wal-Mart is hoping for a steady flow of shoppers instead of mammoth crowds swelling outside its stores in the wee hours of Friday.

Let's see, how can we take away my family's favorite holiday tradition?

In another new twist this year, shoppers at Wal-Mart will not have to sprint toward a pile of flat-screen televisions and scuffle with one another to get one. (But this is what Christ was ABOUT! ~ Ed.) Rather, customers will be able to enter the store at any time and line up at merchandise displays for the must-have items on their lists. When the products go on sale Friday at 5 a.m., workers will supervise the lines, giving shoppers the merchandise in the order in which they joined the line — until the goods are out of stock (zzzzzzzzz... Ed.).

Saturday, November 7, 2009

God's Hand

This was hilarious at 3 in the morning. Let's see if it stands the test of time...

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Smiff is onto something?

Well, either he or Dick "Dick" (Dick) Dick...

Feeling grumpy 'is good for you'

Though the bright sunny days of San Diego seem to negate that somewhat...

Snow Leopard vs Windows 7

So Fung just bought himself a new laptop with Windows 7 on it. He was also FORCED to buy baby sis a new computer with Snow Leopard on it (or at least I think it's on there, we did buy refurbished). So Fung thinks to himself - hey, I can look at both, and praise or trash them using his blog! I guess I'll have to pry the computer from my sisters hands at some point - maybe we'll swap just for the grins. I will say so far on the Windows 7 side that the taskbar at the bottom looks eerily similar to the dock that OS X has had since, what, the beginning of time? Sigh. I sees myself having lotsa fun with dis one...

Good News Everyone

Fung will be able to blab on, even in da deepest tunnels of da CTA. In exchange, CTA gets some money for the slush fund.

Friday, October 30, 2009

Blimey!

What has this world come to? Even kids aren't immune from layoffs! Why there ought to be a law...

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

This is probably nothing to worry about (cont'd)

Fewer Americans See Solid Evidence of Global Warming

There has been a sharp decline over the past year in the percentage of Americans who say there is solid evidence that global temperatures are rising. And fewer also see global warming as a very serious problem – 35% say that today, down from 44% in April 2008.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Even Vista isn't this bad. Sure, it crashes, burps, slows down, is unintuitive, and is just darn right nasty. But it doesn't just lose all your data just because you installed an update!

Apple acknowledges Snow Leopard data loss issue

Let's see how Windows 7 will top this screw up...

Monday, October 12, 2009

The Smiff Reign of TERROR!!!!

Smiff - a reign of Terror unseen since French Times...

What sticks in the craw.

What makes the rain sad.

What makes ice cream taste like salt.

A pretty girl walks down the street in a yellow dress and you don't even notice.

Defeat.

Defeat, an old unwelcome friend with the chilly embrace and the long thin fingers that unwind across your back. October.

The Wellness Center All-Star League.

Smiff is champion again. Say it with me. Say it one time, say it twice. Say it three times, say it four. Smiff is champion again.

Evil triumphs. The hero is thrown from the horse. The villain has the jewels.

Was it a collapse? Undoubtedly. But to claim it was just a collapse would be to deny the evil genius of a man who never made a waiver claim gone wrong. Who combs the free agent pool leaving gold trails along the discarded names as he plucks the nugget from the rough and washes it to a shine in the MI position. Or in the C2 position.

Holds.

In the long days of summer it seemed the leaves would live forever, so strong they held the sunlight in a gleam and the moonlight in mystery. Joe Mauer would double and the crowd would be disappointed. Lincecum would allow a run to gasps from the crowd. Even Cole Hamels only sucked a little.

And the Lord Viper Scorpians were sucking air. Or did they just plot?

Was this rope-a-dope?

We know what the evil genius would say. But we know also that in the dark night of his soul, a blackness that could only be imagined, like a black hole, or some Vernesian vortex in the middle of some lost ocean, there were many 7 for 37s with a double and a couple rbi. A quarter score of double plays to sicken what gleam of hope attempted to make its way down into the dark depths of the Viper soul.

Yet Smiff plotted. Tireless fingers worked the waiver strings and his master puppeteering began to pay results in the shorter days, the longer, hot August nights.

Smiff was reborn. A Phoenix of the Seventh Circle ascending.

We fought. We traded. We prayed for rain. Hamels began to pitch like an asshole again. In a surprise to nobody, Harden, a wounded bird on a hot porch, foundered with stunted wing. The Cyclones fell, Icarus-like, toward the vortex opening beneath them.

Still they fought. Thrashed. Sighed at the emptiness of a middle infield that Sahara like stretched empty to the farthest horizons. Aye, there was no there there. And yet they walked. Wary eyes on the riders approaching from the rear on the dark horses.

The moon lit their reflections red and for weeks trails were covered up as we hid among the dunes of our early fortune.

But the windstorm of the Viper Elefantes did duel with the Cyclones and fate had it that this is the Wellness Center, and the tie goes to the Champion of long-standing.

This year.

But this year is the bookend to the beginning of a dynasty.

Yes. It is the end.

The Smiff has been bloodied. He needed the miracle of Charbeanaeuan incompetence to save him. What next year when others rise to compete? Will the Foleys don the armor of the noble challenger? Will Kevin fight for the honor of the librarian? Will Desiree finish yet another marathon?

Will the Beej uncover untold riches in the aging lumber of hungry veterans? Will Zak awake to the cries of a child in the early night only to be struck with the inspiration of a real trade offer?

Will the chemists of the West Coast alchemize the gold shield to dismiss the spears of Smiff's genius?

Will it be Corms again, his genius shined after his years in the wilderness of the basement?

It will be some or it will be all of us.

Yes, Smiff will languish in the tower of sorrows.

Smiff,

You will lose. Your race is run. The stops have been put out and you enjoy another fat winter. But the spring rains will be cold this year. And the August nights will be full of the pestering bites of misfortune. September will be the bitter harvest of your evil genius.

You will lose.

You will lose.

You are champion. You will lose.

And you'll LIKE it!

It's that annual time of year that comes around every year about this time...

"You'll pay more -- as much as 75 cents more a ride. You'll have to wait another five or 10 minutes for the bus or train to arrive and it likely will be even more crowded than it is now. And if you work for the Chicago Transit Authority, you could be one of the 1,000 folks who are about to be laid off."

Friday, October 9, 2009

Onion Or Real?

Marge Simpson a Playboy covergirl

Apparently Flanders wants to get the 20 year olds to read a magazine who's average reader age is 35.

Obama wins Nobel Peace Prize

Apparently everyone was so scared shitless by Dumbya and Dick "Dick" (Dick) Dick that just replacing them meant a hyooooge increase in peace all over the world.

Earth to Moon - It's on, bitch

Finally - an enemy we can all agree on. What has the moon done for us lately?

Another label needed: zombie/End Times nexus

"Zombies are an apocalyptic threat, we are living in times of apocalyptic anxiety (and) we need a vessel in which to coalesce those anxieties..."

LoC: Still the only source on the Google for "live-blogging the End Times," by the way...

2000 labels - is that a lot?

And today we could really use a "brain-dead Norwegians" label.

I deleted "Alfonsucko SUCKS" but it won't let me create "Alfonsucko the 12-fingered freak SUCKS." I don't see how the work of the Nation can move forward.

This appears to be a new feature?

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Push Polled

Just got off the phone with the NRA. A message from the president with a one question poll. I was informed that the UN "one world government" and the [evil] Hillary Clinton are conspiring to take away guns from US citizens. I was kind of laughing and smirking through the whole tape recorded message. I wanted to say something clever once the gentlemen after the recorded message asked me if I opposed the plan of the UN and Hillary to take away guns - but all I could say was I disagreed with the premise of the question. I did say I supported the 2nd Amendment, which I do - with perameters. I am not big on my neighbors having nukes - which the plain language of the amendment could be read to allow - after all a weapon unused is a useless weapon. I guess if I had more energy I could have tried to engage the man in a conversation or told him I favored socialism or asked him about why he believed what he believed - oh well. Maybe I still like the Americans I disagree with too much. I told him I'd look in to the plan to strip my fellow Americans of their constitutional rights and thanked him for informing me about this potential move against liberty.

Maybe ... best line ever.

"I didn’t want to wake up tied to a tree, being invited to squeal like a little piggy for the entertainment of a 20-year-old psychopath in giant dun­ga­rees, with three teeth in his head and a bitter hatred of anyone who wasn’t also a 30-stone homophobic racist who shot at things he didn’t understand."

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Time to close shop?

You're not going to believe this shit: we have reached blogger's limit of 2000 labels. (I tried "America hating Conservatives now happy" with the last post.) Yeah, i know, WHAT THE FUCK? I mean, the PHOKKING THING SUCKS! Since the labels are the chief reason to be here, and since no one posts anymore since Obama was elected and everything is better now, is there a point to carry on? Also, Blogger can blow it out the ass. I can't even add a "Blogger SUCKS" label now. And that sucks because THEY SUCK. I mean, i'm really beside myself here.

Thoughts? Better yet, how can we bring Blogger down in a fiery crash?

Yet another Chicago sports' embarrassment

Friday, October 2, 2009

Universal Coverage

Heard an anti-health care reform advert tonight. 50 million additional patients with no new doctors. Ergo, reform will result in rationing and diminished health care for all.

Isn't this an argument for more doctors rather than less health care? Unless you are of course you are making the somewhat more philosophical argument that distribution of resources in any system are imperfect and because health care is a resource, some people just aren't going to get it and are going to die and that's okay. I'll accept that argument to a point but 50 million seems a little high to me. Plus I would argue (1) making sure your neighbor doesn't get swine flu and give it to you is probably a good thing and (2) If I found myself with potentially terminal cancer with no insurance, no money and in need of medical care in a country that encourages massive inequities in wealth and gun ownership and has a capable prison medical system, that would be a pretty easy decision for me.

Not to mention I guess with not enough doctors for the 50 million people the Republicans don't see a way to help now, it's sure a good thing we are aborting all those babies, god forbid we have another 1 or 10 million more that we don't have doctors for - we can't simply get more doctors.

I guess I need to go back and read the bible. Thousands of uninsured dying are just God's will. That's the new health insurance.

SHOCKING NEWS

Obamas went to Copenhagen, Chicago loses.

Which means (and this is the shocking part) that Briggs was right...

Not to mention that the Repubs will probably have a field day on dis one - See, he's not superman after all...

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Is someone going to fix all the broken links?

The Fisk Scoresheet link don't work no more, QT is defunct as we all know, The Tattler moved on to da Trib, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. So who's gonna fix da links so dey all work? I nominate Corms.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Can you tell which news story is fake and which one actually appeared in the Onion?

Nadir Of Western Civilization To Be Reached This Friday At 3:32 P.M.

According to the panel, the final event will occur at 3:32 p.m., when a tourist, believing the impressive structure to be a giant mall, will enter Chicago's Museum of Contemporary Art, and, not finding what he is looking for, ask where "the damn Radio Shack is supposed to be."

The man, dressed in Crocs and sweatpants and determined by researchers to be the final catalyst in humanity's epic downfall, will then loudly expel gas.

"This horrible but inevitable day has been a long time coming," said Davidson, before picking up a black marker and, seemingly without thought or intent, drawing a long, thick phallus on his chart. "And by the looks of things, it's almost here."

Some analysts believe the coming cultural sinkhole—the most intellectually and spiritually degrading moment conceivable by science or philosophy—will signal the end of mankind's decay and lead to a steady upward climb. Still, they warned, the event itself could be catastrophically lowbrow.

"With each passing minute, we're getting closer to a second Dark Ages," said noted art critic Mark Lefevre, tearing out pages from his report, folding each into a paper airplane, and tossing decades of hard work around the room. "Unless something is done to protect what little sophistication and refinement we have left, Western society may soon regress to a point of no return. We need to act, and act fast."

"Come on," added the two-time MacArthur "genius grant" recipient, before stripping down to his undergarments and brandishing an automatic assault rifle. "Let's get 'er done!"

Ammo Sales Spike Continues Months After Obama Elected

Bullet-makers are working around the clock, seven days a week, and still can't keep up with the nation's demand for ammunition.

Shooting ranges, gun dealers and bullet manufacturers say they have never seen such shortages. Bullets, especially for handguns, have been scarce for months because gun enthusiasts are stocking up on ammo, in part because they fear President Barack Obama and the Democratic-controlled Congress will pass antigun legislation — even though nothing specific has been proposed and the president last month signed a law allowing people to carry loaded guns in national parks.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Blogging from Da Caribbean

So I've blogged from South America, Europe, Africa, now da Caribbean. What's left? Asia? Australia? Da South Pole? Outta Space?

Fung's already made his mark - he managed to clog da toilet. Seems to be taking quite a while to unclog too. Now perhaps it's time to go out and mingle with the locals. But dinner first perhaps.

Go Catz! Destroy the 'Cuse!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Speaking of Solchers Fielt...

Payton's family wants to donate statue at Soldier Field

According to a Payton family spokeswoman, park district officials explained that Soldier Field and the area surrounding it is to be preserved strictly as a memorial to war veterans. There also is concern a Payton statue outside of Soldier Field might diminish the stature of other former Bears Hall of Famers.

I think we can all agree that Payton is a veteran of many wars, of the gridiron type. Can't we find a way to compromise?

The bronze statue, being constructed in Wasilla, Alaska,

So that Payton can turn his steely gaze towards Russia, and they will know that they can't phokk with the USA! I'm also having trouble remembering why I should know this town name...

One former Bears Hall of Famer whose likeness is not on the sculpture (currently in Solchers Fielt - ed) is Mike Ditka, who had feuded with the McCaskey family.

Dikka vs Halas - who wins dat one?

Friday, September 11, 2009

Some answers for Fung?

Why Did People Become White?

~

IOC sounding like spoiled children

Crain's is reporting that Michelle Obama, not the president, will go to Copenhagen to represent Chicago before the IOC. That means "the odds on Chicago's Olympic bid just got longer." The IOC knows all about our bid, and knows Obama supports it, but apparently somehow he needs to get on an aeroplane and fly over there in order to prove it to them. (And I'm not sure he's actually president anyway.)

"Mr. Obama’s absence could be a major blow to Chicago’s bid with weeks to go before the vote. Heads of state have become an expected part of the bidding process since 2005 (ooooh, it's a tradition that stretches all the way back to... last time? Ed.) when British Prime Minister Tony Blair convinced the IOC to send the 2012 Games to London ... Mr. Obama told Mr. Rogge earlier Friday that he wouldn’t be able to attend the IOC meeting in Copenhagen."

Can we send Tony Blair? He's a proven veteran, after all...

"'She's not the president,' said Rob Livingstone, who runs the Toronto-based Web site GamesBids.com, which tracks the race to host the Olypmics. 'The IOC members are hoping for the president.'"

Waaaaah for them. I'm still hoping for a pony.

"Bid watchers, however, smell a smoke screen that Mr. Obama might ultimately show up on Oct. 2 in Denmark."

I await the Lou Dobbs poll on that possibility.

White meat only

Yeah, I read the post below. The bill clearly states that illegal immigrants aren't covered. NPR had a good piece on this the other day. Excluding the people who think that everything Obama says or writes is untrue, there are a few who have legitimate concerns. Illegal immigrants could still potentially falsify records to receive treatment. Or when they do seek treatment they could either impose costs or be turned away.

I just think that the right-wing has no real solutions to these problems. Close the border. Ha! And the oceans? It isn't to difficult to see the unveiled racism. The new bill may not have tough enforcement provisions or procedures for weeding out illegal immigrants, but what would the right-wing have us do without adding to government bureaucracy (which the also hate)? Maybe just give the doctor a skin tone chart to check if someone is white enough to get treatment? That would exclude many illegals and have the added benefit of excluding legal blacks, hispanics, arabs and indians.

I just love where pro-life ends. After the umbillical cord is cut. Pro-life means that after you are born, others have the right to deny you medical care, sustinance, education, housing, employment, justice, etc. Even if you will die without it. I can't believe this type of hostility to fellow human beings is really a beneficial, adaptive, competitive trait.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Bill "Always Wrong" Kristol really not even trying to not be wrong anymore

The health care system is in swell shape, and besides, isn't doing nothing always better than doing anything anyway?

"There is no health care crisis, and doing no harm is far preferable to doing real damage to a good health care system."
~

With apologies to QT, The Case for Zero Tolerance of Modern School Administrators continues (cont'd)

The Arlington Independent School District, which passed on airing President Barack Obama's live classroom address, has announced that some students will be bussed off campus to hear a message from former President George W. Bush on Sept. 21.
~
"Arlington school officials said they wouldn’t show [Obama's address] live because they didn’t want to interrupt lessons," and, on a related note, appear to be fullas#i+.
~

It's a sign of the times (cont)

Lawyers, bankers cash in on fantasy football

"That Monday, [Olszewski] came in the office, and he was bummed out," said Anthony Giaccone, president of Intermarket Insurance. "He asked, 'Why can't we buy insurance for fantasy team players?' "

That's the American way - taking someone's lemons and making lemonade that makes someone else lots of money. Anybody think Parcers needs fantasy insurance?

Well, somebody was lying

Wilson had, in an emotional expression, proven Obama's point: the summer of town halls had been less a discussion than a circus, a forum where misinformation was vindicated by passion, where disrespect was elevated as a virtue. Now the circus had come inside Congress. (Yay! I love the circus... and an elephant just took a crap in the center ring... and slid through it... Ed.)

The President's seemingly simple statement, that "the reforms I am proposing would not apply to those who are here illegally," is not hard to check. In the Senate Finance Committee working framework for a health plan, which Obama's speech seemed most to mimic, there is the line: "No illegal immigrants will benefit from the health care tax credits." (Hey Joe -- it's on page 4... Ed.) Similarly, the major health care reform bill to pass out of committee in the House, H.R. 3200, contains a Section 246, which is called, "NO FEDERAL PAYMENT FOR UNDOCUMENTED ALIENS." ... He was claiming something — benefits for illegal immigrants — that is expressly prohibited in the major legislative efforts in both houses of Congress.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Hey America - Steinberg just called ya yeller

The only thing we have to fear...

I don't know why Europeans are so much better at change than we are ... For whatever reason, France -- no stranger to tradition -- could scrap its 350-year-old franc and embrace the euro while we can't even replace dollar bills with sturdier dollar coins.

Part of it is leadership vacuum -- our politicians continually run for re-election, and who wants to risk alienating the generous zinc industry by scrapping the penny? Americans resist change, not because we love the status quo, but because we're terrified that whatever comes next will be worse. That isn't a laudable national quality, but then we didn't invent timidity either. As Hamlet muses, we'd "rather bear those ills we have, than fly to others that we know not of. Thus conscience does make cowards of us all."

And there is a definite cowardly feel to this moment in American history. Serious problems face us, yet the public howl is for inaction.

A religion, explained

LoC Twitter outburst has Cholly talking in circles

"I definitely am not going to get away from him... We're going to work with him. And we're going to get him back to where he can get consistent and go out there and save games... I'm not saying he'll close tomorrow or the next day.... We're talking a real fine line... My gosh, this is quite a tasty squirrel..."

Friday, September 4, 2009

what life will be like when we're all up against BHO's death panels

The hospital began urging families to plan while people are healthy. For those who want help writing a directive, a physician will discuss the powers and limits of medicine and explain to family members what it means if they agree to serve as the "health-care agent." ... The directives are power-of-attorney forms that protect physicians and family members against liability, and the hospital makes clear to its doctors that they are expected to follow them. Today, more than 90 percent of people in town have directives when they die, double the national average.

Everyone: unhinged (cont'd)

HOUSTON (shocking!) — President Obama's plan to deliver a speech to public school students on Tuesday has set off a revolt among conservative parents, who have accused the president of trying to indoctrinate their children with socialist ideas and are asking school officials to excuse the children from listening.

The uproar over the speech, in which Mr. Obama intends to urge students to work hard and stay in school, has been particularly acute in Texas, where several major school districts, under pressure from parents, have laid plans to let children opt out of lending the president an ear...

Mark Steyn, a Canadian author and political commentator, speaking on the Rush Limbaugh show on Wednesday, accused Mr. Obama of trying to create a cult of personality, comparing him to Saddam Hussein and Kim Jong-il, the North Korean leader.

The Republican Party chairman in Florida, Jim Greer, said he "was appalled that taxpayer dollars are being used to spread President Obama’s socialist ideology.”

And Chris Stigall, a Kansas City talk show host, said, "I wouldn’t let my next-door neighbor talk to my kid alone; I’m sure as hell not letting Barack Obama talk to him alone."

Thursday, September 3, 2009

What could possibly cheer us up as another dismal baseball season winds down?

How about a nice frosty cupcake?

This Saturday's thrilling Northwestern Wildcats vs. Towson Tigers matchup is the sixth-most-delectable creampuff served up anywhere in the Nation this year, according to Sporting News. Which means the 'Cats better not blow it.

an embarrassment for everyone involved

Carlos Torres tossed seven innings of shutout ball against the Cubs for his first major league victory on Thursday.
And so interleague play comes to an end. Some would argue that it's appropriate that it finishes with an AL team that's already given up on the season shutting out an NL team with one of the game's highest payrolls. Torres had allowed seven runs and walked nine in 9 1/3 innings as a major leaguer. Today, he walked none and struck out six.

~

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

No, not those Chix

Chicks Being Ground Up Alive Video

(AP) WASHINGTON — An undercover video shot by an animal rights group at an Iowa egg hatchery shows workers discarding unwanted chicks by sending them alive into a grinder, and other chicks falling through a sorting machine to die on the factory floor.

Chicago-based Mercy for Animals said it shot the video at Hy-Line North America's hatchery in Spencer, Iowa, over a two-week period in May and June. The video was obtained Monday by The Associated Press....
~

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Obama's climate change policies explained

Just what downstate Illinois needs: anudder pig-at-the-trough Hastert

From Greenwald's It's time to embrace American royalty:

UPDATE V: Elect the father-dependent Ethan Hastert to his dad's former seat in Congress (h/t). I'd be willing to bet that this "self-described economic and social conservative" finds affirmative action to be a deep affront to merit-based achievement.
~

William 'the Bloody' Kristol: Always Wrong (cont'd)

Guess i forgot that the Washington Post added him as a columnist after the NY Times shitcanned his ass. It's like a "Proven Veteran" in baseball... Also, other than DICK! Cheney, is there a person alive who loves war more than this asshole?

No Will, No Way by William Kristol
George Will is dismayed by American casualties in Afghanistan, unhappy about the length of our effort there, dismissive of the contributions of our NATO allies, contemptuous of the Afghan central government, and struck by the country’s backwardness....
~

Was Blago's book release timed to coincide with Shameless Promotion Month?

Also: Beware the Ides of National Chicken Month:

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Most probably think Obama is an Egyptian and don't want their mother's medicare taken away by the gubmint

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/

~

Once they've wiped out all the old folks, they're going to start killing Republicans

RNC Warns of Partisan Death Panels

It has been suggested* that the government could use voter registration to determine a person’s political affiliation, prompting fears that GOP voters might be discriminated against for medical treatment in a Democrat-imposed health care rationing system. Does this possibility concern you?

(*Or, if not, then we're suggesting it now..)

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Brain-Dead WGN Listeners

The Obama Administration is investigating whether or not the CIA committed crimes while interogating detainees.

  • This is worth looking back and taking care of. (223 responses)

    35.7%

  • It was a nasty affair but the country is better served by looking forward. (401 responses)

    64.3%

624 total responses

(Results not scientific)

~

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Whitey Keeping Darky Down (again)

So some 18 year old South African came from nowhere to just crush all the other women at the World Championships in the 800m race, so now she has to prove she's a she. Well actually she started the crushing a few weeks ago and so they started testing but apparently testing to see if you're a man or a woman takes "weeks", and the test couldn't be completed in time for the World Championships. So she hasn't truly won yet - not until whitey is satisfied that she's XX. Stay tuned for the results, for which I'm sure there will be some sort of dramatic press conference.

So just remember - whiteys are phenoms. Darkies - gender cheaters until proven to be phenoms.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

They sure grow up fast these days

Is there a more "American" headline?

7-year-old shoots 4-year-old with mom's gun
Associated Press
Published on Tue, Aug 18, 2009 at 13:38 in World section
Tags:
Detroit, Shooting , Flint
INVESTIGATIONS ON: The four-year old was taken to a local hospital and is critical.

Related Stories
Bra deflects bullet aimed at Detroit woman

Flint (Michigan): A four-year-old boy remains in critical condition after police say he was shot by his seven-year-old cousin on Flint's north side.
Authorities say the shooting happened just before 10 pm on Sunday, about 55 miles northwest of Detroit.
Police told The Flint Journal that the seven-year-old boy found a loaded gun in his mother's bedroom, went into his own room, pointed the gun at his cousin and fired.
The four-year old was taken to a local hospital. No further details were released.
The state Department of Human Services is investigating.

~

An asshole to the very end

Robert Novak: I Didn't Hurt Plame at All -- And 'The Hell with You'!
Lengthy Q and A with the ailing columnist in the new Washingtonian. At end they get around to asking about the CIA leak case. Novak replies in part: "From a personal point of view, I said in the book I probably should have ignored what I’d been told about Mrs. Wilson.
"Now I’m much less ambivalent. I’d go full speed ahead because of the hateful and beastly way in which my left-wing critics in the press and Congress tried to make a political affair out of it and tried to ruin me. My response now is this: The hell with you. They didn’t ruin me. I have my faith, my family, and a good life. A lot of people love me—or like me. So they failed. I would do the same thing over again because I don’t think I hurt Valerie Plame whatsoever." -- Greg Mitchell

~

Jon Stewart has noticed that an awful lot of Lou Dobbs viewers seem to be agreeing with Lou Dobbs lately...

Blogger is telling me the embed code is "broken." (More likely, Blogger still sucks. Not that an actual person is to blame.) So here's the link.

http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/mon-august-17-2009/poll-bearers

Meanwhile, it's a little puzzling that only an overwhelming majority -- but not a shocking majority -- of Lou Dobbs viewers agreed with Lou Dobbs last night.

Question: Top Obama administration officials over the weekend said the public government-run health-care option is not an essential part of the plan. But then other officials walked back from those trial balloons. Do you believe the public option will be killed, or is this an attempt to quiet those middle-class Americans who speaking out?

The Public Option Will Be Dropped ~ 10%
Just More Gamesmanship by the Administration ~ 90%

What the phokk is this shit?

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If we don't hear from you, though, we will remove your blog from Blog*Spot within a few weeks.
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~

stop me if you've heard this one before

News item: Favre's agent: 'It's a done deal' that QB will sign with Vikings

Thursday, August 13, 2009

These apparently aren't performance enhancers...

Bronson Arroyo told the USA Today that he uses several over-the-counter supplements not on major league baseball's approved list. Arroyo, who last month admitted to using androstenedione and amphetamines back in the early 2000s, is at it again. This story should get the attention of baseball executives. "I have a lot of guys in (the locker room) who think I'm out of (my) mind because I'm taking a lot of things not on the (MLB-approved) list," Arroyo said. "I take 10 to 12 different things a day, and on the days I pitch, there's four more things. There's a caffeine drink I take from a company that (former teammate) Curt Schilling introduced me to in '05. I take some Korean ginseng and a few other proteins out there that are not certified. But I haven't failed any tests, so I figured I'm good."

Hey Bronson, have you considered Garlique? It is was has made Larry King ageless. I mean, the man is 700 years old and has had 27 wives. Also, it's all natural!
~

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Which step is this?

Success Is a Choice: Ten Steps to Overachieving in Business and Life by Rick Pitino

So the extortionist is named Sypher? How fitting...

Report: Pitino tells cops he paid for abortion
LOUISVILLE, Ky. — Louisville men's basketball coach Rick Pitino told police he had sex with a woman accused of trying to extort him of $10 million and later paid for her abortion, a newspaper reported Tuesday.
The Courier-Journal of Louisville published on its Web site that Pitino told police he had been drinking in a Louisville restaurant and had consensual sex with Karen Sypher in August 2003. The police report said the 56-year-old coach denied Sypher's allegations that he raped her after the restaurant closed and another time somewhere else.
Sypher reported the rape allegations to police last month, but a Kentucky prosecutor said the complaint wouldn't be prosecuted because it lacked supporting evidence. Sypher, 49, has pleaded not guilty to federal charges of lying to the FBI and trying to extort money from Pitino, who is married....

~

THIS WOULD BE TOTALLY AWESOME!

Santorum For Prez 2012
Huzzah, Rick Santorum! The former Pennsylvania senator, dog-sex fetishist, Nostradamus of Terror, and reluctant John McCain supporter seems to be plotting a presidential run for 2012, which would be awesome … for America.
He’ll
be in Iowa in early October, and the only reason any non-resident would be in such a place at the onset of a six-month winter is to persuade the party wingnutry that they’re conservative enough to win the Iowa Straw Poll, which is a type of informal lottery for deranged religious nuts.
Remember how Mike Huckabee won Iowa the last time, and now he’s the president? Exactly.
Anyway, Santorum. Nice to see him back on the political stage after a several-year hiatus following his 2006 senatorial rout. Rumor has it he spent his time off having illegal gay man-on-dog sex, constantly.
Santorum dips toes in 2012 Iowa waters [Politico]

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

A second chink in the armor?

MADRID -- Los Angeles Lakers center Pau Gasol underwent surgery on the index finger of his left hand Monday after breaking it during practice with Spain's national team, the Lakers confirmed.

Gasol will be sidelined at least three weeks.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Did Kill Kenny rob a bank? A very large bank, with say at least $60 million in it?

White Sox claimed outfielder Alex Rios off waivers from the Blue Jays.
Rios, 28, is expected to join the White Sox Tuesday in Seattle. He'll bring a .264/.317/.427 batting line, 14 home runs, 62 RBI and a long-term contract worth over $60 million. The outfielder will have to battle for playing time in Chicago this season. But if the club lets impending free agent Jermaine Dye walk this winter, Rios could be the everyday right fielder in 2010.

~

Trib to take lead in World's Awfulest Newspaper standings?

The TOC Blog
Mariotti to the Chicago Tribune?
Posted in
Media, Sports & Rec by Jonathan Messinger on August 10th, 2009 at 10:06 am
Sports blog SportsbyBrooks
has the unconfirmed scoop this morning that erstwhile Sun-Times columnist Jay Mariotti—who declared he needed to get out of the biz because newspapers were dying—will start at the Chicago Tribune on September 1. In case you were wondering, since he left the Sun-Times, Mariotti has been playing over at FanHouse and hollering to no end. Literally, there is no end in sight, and no end could possibly justify the means.
So now he might be coming to the Trib, which for the first time would put me on his side. By which I mean: Die newspapers, die.

~

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Anthony Bourdain's Hatred for Ducks Reaches a New Level

Foieadka

~

A chink in the armor?

My longtime small forward will miss 1/8th of the season. Not exactly a crushing blow to the two-time title defense hopes, but the other PARCers need some ray of sunshine...

Orlando Magic All-Star Rashard Lewis will be suspended for the first 10 games of next season because he has tested positive for a testosterone-producing steroid, the Orlando Sentinel has learned.

Edinson Volquez: a philosophical inquiry

Was it K-Mad? Or Dusty?

News item: Volquez (elbow, meteorite) underwent successful Tommy John surgery on Monday, the Reds' official site reports.

Spin: He could take as long as 12 months to recover, so Volquez may not be back in the rotation for Cincinnati until August of 2010. Beyond that, it sometimes takes even longer for a pitcher to regain his velocity and effectiveness, so Volquez may not return to form until 2011 -- if at all (assuming he lives).

Do these two have compromising photos of every GM in baseball?

They have both SUCKED for years. At least Ledezzzma is left-handed. Tomko has only had 2 seasons out of 13 where his ERA+ was better than league average. The first was his rookie season and the last was in 2004. There must be hundreds of pitchers in the minors who would do better in the majors. HE MUST BE THE GREATEST CLUBHOUSE GUY EVAH. And watch him become a pitching coach after his career...

Brett Tomko-R- Athletics
Aug. 5 - 10:54 pm et
A's signed RHP Brett Tomko to a minor league contract.
Tomko was released by the Yankees last week. He posted a 5.25 ERA in 20 2/3 innings in New York. The 36-year-old right-hander will report to Triple-A Sacramento.

Wilfredo Ledezma-R- Blue Jays
Aug. 5 - 10:51 pm et
Blue Jays signed LHP Wilfredo Ledezma to a minor league contract.
Ledezma posted a 9.53 ERA in 5 2/3 innings for the Nationals in April prior to getting released. He was assigned to Triple-A Las Vegas. Ledezma serves as organizational depth and possesses no fantasy upside.

~

The only thing we have to fear...

No mention of the Canadian Commandos in this story, which is probably on purpose. But we all know.

Terrorists Take Over Lake Michigan Cruise Ship.

And msnbc thought it was being toungue-in-cheek when they called it "the terrorist hot spot that is the Great Lakes."

This is probably nothing to worry about (cont'd)... actually I have no idea... Fung?

Researchers: XML Security Flaws are Pervasive

Security researchers today unveiled details about a little-known but ubiquitous class of vulnerabilities that may reside in a range of Internet components, from Web applications to mobile and cloud computing platforms to documents, images and instant messaging products...

Codenomicon is a spinoff from the University of Oulu, and is run by many of the same individuals who in 2001-2002 found and reported a widespread vulnerability in a remote Internet management protocol called ASN.1. That research kicked off months of studying and patching by the U.S. government and private sector, which found the ASN.1 flaws extended to some of the nation's most critical electronic infrastructures, including the telephone network, the power grid, and air traffic control systems. (What about fantasy baseball data??? ed.)

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

This has got to happen!

Coach Lou Holtz vs. Suzanne Kosmas?
No sure thing it will happen, but ESPN analyst and former Notre Dame football coach Lou Holtz was meeting with Republican leaders in Washington Thursday about the prospect of challenging Democratic U.S. Rep. Suzanne Kosmas. Holtz, 72 and living in the Orlando area, would surely be a terrific money-raiser and bring loads of attention to that seat, though plenty of other credible Republicans including Winter Park Commissioner Karen Diebel and state Reps. Sandy Adams and Dorothy Hukill also are running.
Celebrity candidates can be unpredictable in politics, of course. The Orlando Sentinel, which first reported the potential Holtz candidacy, noted that last year Holtz had to apologize after calling Hitler a great leader.

~

Monday, August 3, 2009

If Smiff worked at Sterling Cooper


Prior

670 the Score reported this afternoon that Mark Prior (armectomy, will to live) has been waived by the San Diego Padres. In lieu of flowers, the family is asking that individuals throw towels across the room until the pain in their arm exceeds the pain in their heart (or ass).

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Never stopped Santo

Hawk, after the Sox lose to complete the sweep by the Twinkies up dere in the Metrodome: "This ballpark...I wish I could cuss right now."

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Was Todd Hollandsworth not available?

White Sox land Kotsay for Anderson
Veteran outfielder should provide help off the bench in Chicago

MINNEAPOLIS -- Brian Anderson got his wish to be traded, and in the process, the White Sox apparently have added a valuable veteran piece to their bench for the playoff push over the next two months.

Anderson, 27, was traded to Boston in exchange for Mark Kotsay and cash considerations on Tuesday. Kotsay, 33, is a .281 hitter with 110 home runs and 614 RBIs over 13 Major League seasons. He batted .257 with one homer and five RBIs in 27 games for the Red Sox in 2009 before being designated for assignment on July 24.

Annudder riduculous poll

Dere's a poll on the Facebooks asking if welfare recipients should take a drug test first. Has anyone taken it? If so, please report the results. I can't bring myself to take the poll. It's tooooo stooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooopid.

Monday, July 27, 2009

K-Mad won't have him to kick around any longer

WASHINGTON (AP) — Sen. Jim Bunning says he will not run for re-election in 2010.


sounds like he's part of the conspiracy

“Twenty-five percent of my people believe the Pentagon and Rumsfeld were responsible for taking the twin towers down,” said Rep. Collin Peterson, a Democrat who represents a conservative Republican district in Minnesota. “That’s why I don’t do town meetings.”

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Growth Industry

Swedish lesbians suck sperm banks dry


They'll have two mommies AND be Danish? No, shouldn't cause any problems on the playground...

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Intensity: Good if You're Pale; Bad if you're not

Yesterday was the 26th anniversary of the "Pine Tar" game. I'm sure we've all seen the replay of George Brett going batshit insane hundreds of times. My question is this: Why is Brett's charging out of the dugout with murder in his eyes, his anger so manifest that he has to be physically restrained and pulled away from the umpire, viewed as evidence of his virtue while Milton Bradley having to be physically restrained and pulled away from an umpire who not only blew a call but then baited him viewed as evidence of his insanity and lack of virtue?

Friday, July 24, 2009

Even I could hit a 25mph fastball

News item: Japanese professor creates baseball-playing robots

"The pitching robot throws a plastic foam ball at 25 miles per hour, but Ishikawa is hoping to increase the speed to 93 mph and make it able to throw off-speed pitches like curves and sliders."

Yes, well, I'm working on that too...

"Ishikawa is also working on getting the batting robot to be able to hit to all parts of the field."

Good luck teaching it to "do the little things" or "give 110 percent."

LeBron for President!

CLEVELAND (AP) -- LeBron James struggled with sudden fame after appearing on Sports Illustrated's cover as a 17-year-old and admits he smoked marijuana during his junior year in high school.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Fung def Sarge, Corporal

Well, we're back from the state that finally voted correctly, which we got to thru the state that nobody thought would vote correctly, but we're very glad they did. Fungster did well, defeating Sarge & Corporal and taking lotsa pictures in the process, other than the ones the vanquished took when we were giving them a false sense of security. Details, of course, are at the Spades Marathon blog site, so if you really want to snooze...

Did you know that you could send emails to the blog and they would appear as posts? Fung was struggling with trying to type in stuff in the small ass window on his Google phone (you'd think that the Google phone and the blogger, both owned by the Google, would be a match made in heaven, right? Nope.). Not to mention that some guy was screaming in his ear about how every single drive on that road at that time was a freaking moron and didn't know how to drive. But once he figgered dat out, things were much easier. Except for labeling of course, but you can do that afterward. Or just let Smiff do it for you.

Also, this I believe brings us up to 10 posts for the week. 10 posts? That's like a deluge! If we double them to 20, that will be like the most since like February or something! Oh, W. We miss you, and Dick (Dick) "Dick" Dick, and Condi, and Rummy, and Turblossom, and all those other guys that made this blog possible.

Not mentioned: A whole buncha guys who couldn't give a phokk about Spades, Briggs.

This is your brain on HGH

Does Lou Dobbs ever get tired of being right all the time?

LOU DOBBS: “[T]he stock market has lost 20 percent since this president was sworn in. He has his own bear market. That’s the definition of a bear market, a 20 percent decline. This is now the Obama bear market.” [CNN, 3/9/09]


News item:
"The stock market soared to its highest level since November Thursday..."


J.P. Freire:
‘I Can’t Remember Anyone Saying’ The Bear Market Was Obama’s Fault

It's so hard to tell the bad books apart from the good books -- couldn't we just burn down the whole libarry just to be safe?

Library fight riles up city, leads to book-burning demand

Outside West Bend, the fight caught the attention of Robert Braun, who, with three other Milwaukee-area men, filed a claim against West Bend calling for one of the library's books to be publicly burned, along with financial damages.

The four plaintiffs -- who describe themselves as "elderly" in their complaint --- claim their "mental and emotional well-being was damaged by [the] book at the library."
~

Put that on the board

Apologies if you used one of those recordificating machines to recordify the proceedings..

Buehrle completes perfect game to throttle Rays

A shocking percentage of Lou Dobbs viewers agreed with Lou Dobbs last night (cont'd)

Would you trust your senator or congressman with a secret?
Yes 5% 482
No 95% 8526
Total Votes: 9008
Though delightfully inane, this is not a scientific poll


On the other hand, if Michael Medved thinks you're a nutburger, you might be a really YOOOGE nutburger.

Unlike Dobbs, some conservative media think birthers are "nutburgers"
~

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

JAMBA JUICE PHOKKING SUCKS: IT'S LIKE DIAHHAREA

No Justice, Part II: Boycott Jamba Juice!
2:30 PM, 7/16/09
Even MORE no justice? How much more no justice can we take? Thanks to everyone who forwarded this Jamba Juice
advertisemo-tainment:
This is an online animated video about going on some kind of stupid “Jamba Juice vacation” in your cubicle....


SHOCKING NEWS

Briggs is leaving the country again. And once again it's to a country I've never been. One minute Quinny and I are begging him to get a passport, next thing you know he's actually using the damn thing. Truly shocking.

Monday, July 20, 2009

A Random Thought Driving Through West Virginia

So, I was cruising down I-75 on my way to Lexington, KY and I passed a Golden Corral.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't you put cows in a corral? Is this really the best name they could come up with for a buffet? Are the executives making fun of the people who eat there?

Thursday, July 16, 2009

I phink not -- "Calling it 'The Big Willie' fine with Willis CEO"

Calling it 'The Big Willie' fine with Willis CEO

(Crain's) — Call it "Big Willie," Joseph Plumeri says of his latest high-profile acquisition, the naming rights to Sears Tower.

The Time has Come

The day is nigh. People from all walks of life are flocking into Columbus, OH for what is known as the Spades Marathon. By popular demand (ok, Briggs), we will attempt to live blog or something on annudder blog, http://spadesmarathon.blogspot.com/, because this one has fallen upon hard times or the Twitters has obliterated it.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Sober. Responsible. Progressive.

Your state government!

Video poker is the linchpin for a huge construction spending plan favored by Quinn and Illinois lawmakers. The plan would be financed by borrowing, with at least half the revenue stream for annual debt service on bonds to come from video poker and new initiatives at the Illinois lottery.

Monday, July 6, 2009

hiney birds in the news

News item: "The buzz in the press boxes is that Mr. Mariotti is going to work at the Chicago Tribune in some capacity. Since Tribune officials are declining to comment on the matter, you know something is in the works."
~

Sunday, July 5, 2009

The supposedly attractive face of evil

URL obliterated for your protection

Boys will be Boys


See, this is what happens when you don't actually have an enemy to fight. Perhaps they need to pick a fight with, oh, let's say Finland.

Friday, July 3, 2009

Happy Independence Day, Sarah Palin.

You may have escaped your job, but you can't escape your self-appointed patron. Bill "Always Wrong" Kristol still believes in you:

If Palin wants to run in 2012, why not do exactly what she announced today? It's an enormous gamble - but it could be a shrewd one.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

adjust expectations accordingly

Buster Posey is a Prairie Chicken.

Be Very Afraid

So what's the invasion schedule dere Smiff? Fung has to know when everything's supposed to be clean & in its place & stuff.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Typical

Cub fan's hunger strike

First, I thought a hunger strike was eating NO food, not this less than I need bull$#!+. Second, you usually go on one of dese for only one reason, not dis "oh, and I'm also trying to lose weight. Seriously. Even Cub fans won't go all the way. Pathetic.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

I don't think anyone anticipated racoons

Josh Outman is out 12-18 months after undergoing Tommy John surgery on Tuesday.

He also had a bone spur, a railroad tie, and a family of racoons removed from his left elbow. It's a serious blow to the A's 2010, 2011, and 2012 rotation as Outman had emerged as the staff's best starter early this season

Trib Readers - Brain Dead

See Sarge, it's not just the sportswriters. It's the readers too.

Readers vote: 'Z' ya later

Monday, June 29, 2009

The times, they are a changin'

Giving up my iPod for a Walkman

Fung went thru a coupla walkmans & discmans before the mp3 was around. That this kid found one thing that was good about that particular walkman was SHOCKING. Though that one advantage probably had more to do with the size of the thing - looks almost as big as his head, so of course there's enuff room to put a microwave, toaster & other appliances on it too!

Friday, June 26, 2009

Is there a 60-Month DL?

News item: Conor Jackson, Ari: Transferred to 60-Day DL (Pneumonia, Desert Fever, Catarrh, the Screaming S#i+s, K-Mad's Palsy, H5N1 Pandemic SUCKS, etc...)

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Why is Obama sticking up for the Surly Penguin, the Prince of Darkness, the Undead Dick (Dick) "Dick" Dick Cheney?

Weismann's organization sued last year to obtain the notes from an interview that the FBI conducted with then-Vice President Dick Cheney. The interview was part of an investigation into leaks concerning undercover CIA officer Valerie Plame, and the Bush administration vigorously fought the release of the notes.

"The records contain descriptions of confidential deliberations among top White House officials which are protected by the deliberative process and presidential communications privileges," Bush's Justice Department argued in an Oct. 10, 2008, legal brief.

Obama's Justice Department held the same line Thursday.
~

pretty sure there's no connection here... yep, quite certain

News item: CTA warns of service cuts
News item: DC Metro may get billions after crash

Fortunately, the L never moves fast enough to hurt anyone.
~

whaaaaa?

1. Blue Ward Cyclones 215.5
2. Manky Dreadful 167.5
3. Lord Viper Elefantes 165.5

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

"I've got responsibilities in making certain...that we are not used as a tool to be exploited by other countries."

ISLAMABAD, Pakistan — An airstrike believed to have been carried out by a United States drone killed at least 60 people at a funeral for a Taliban fighter in South Waziristan on Tuesday, residents of the area and local news reports said...

The United States carried out 22 previous drone strikes this year, as the Obama administration has intensified a policy inherited from the Bush administration.

Before the attack on Tuesday, the Pakistani Army and Air Force had begun operations in South Waziristan against the forces of the Pakistani Taliban leader, Baitullah Mehsud. The group’s suicide bombings in major cities have terrorized Pakistanis for years.

In a serious blow to Pakistan’s effort, on Tuesday an assassin loyal to Mr. Mehsud shot and killed a rival tribal leader, Qari Zainuddin, whom the government had hoped to use as an ally in its campaign to corner the Taliban leader.