More infuriating elevator bullcrap

Alright, so its probably meant only to provoke, but the elevator flashes up today's crap. Most Americans believe that women should be legally required to change their last names to their husband's last name at marriage. I guess the study is from a couple years ago, but ugh.

I'm guessing if you polled a certain subsection of this wonderful land, you would find a group who is in favor of cutting viable male babies out of the wombs of their pregnant mothers and wood chipping the women.

Let's just go back to this:

"If a man happens to meet a virgin woman who is not engaged to be married, and he seizes her and rapes her, but is caught in the act, the rapist must pay the girl's father fifty silver shekels. She must marry the rapist, because he has violated her. And so long as he lives he may not divorce her."

Zombie Nation

President most Americans want back to handle our economic crisis ... Reagan.

Observed in the elevator this morning. Charities that Americans would most want to volunteer their time for ... No. 1 Animal charities at 17%; No. 2 poor and needy 15%.

I can't help thinking Orwell would be proud.

The only question on Chicago's mind

Do you question Jay Cutler's toughness?

Do you question Jay Cutler's toughness?

• Yes -- He was walking around on the sideline. I'd like to have seen him try harder to play. (15909 responses)

  46%

• No -- Cutler took tons of hits this year and only missed one game. Dude is tough. (12521 responses)

  36%

• I'm gonna wait for the MRI results (6045 responses)

  18%

34475 total responses

(Results not scientific, but supreeemely idiotic)

Brain-Dead WGN Listeners

The Obama Administration is investigating whether or not the CIA committed crimes while interogating detainees.

• This is worth looking back and taking care of. (223 responses)

  35.7%

• It was a nasty affair but the country is better served by looking forward. (401 responses)

  64.3%

624 total responses

(Results not scientific)

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Onion or real? (cont'd)

Study finds conservative viewers of Stephen Colbert's comedy show think he's on their side

Do conservatives not understand that Stephen Colbert is joking?
...

"Conservatives not only processed the messages as targeting liberals, but also processed the source as being conservative, Republican, and disliking liberals," the paper says. "By contrast, liberals perceived Colbert as just kidding."

Huh?

The Bears have added former Lions coach Rod Marinelli to the coaching staff. What do you think?
Good move (1331 responses)
60.9%
Bad move (339 responses)
15.5%
Let's wait and see (514 responses)
23.5%
2184 total responses (Results IDIOTIC)
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Zogby-like shenanigans in the news

NS: Thank you, have a good day.
JZ: Go fuck yourself.
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Poll Results Non-Scientific (and extremely brain-dead)

{{{{DRUDGE POLL}}}} WHO WON THE FINAL PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE?...

MCCAIN
72% 129,087
OBAMA
26% 46,935
NEITHER
1% 2,213

Total Votes: 178,235

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More Polling Madness

Quick Vote

Are you thinking about alternatives to stocks for your savings?

No, sticking with stocks 35% 69031
Yes, a CD 20% 39425
Yes, a mattress 45% 88097
Total Votes: 196553

read related article »

This is not a scientific poll, but it is profoundly idiotic

Tastes like burning

Which Cubs collapse broke your heart most of all?

1969 (570 responses) 11.0%
1984 (679 responses) 13.0%
2003 (1854 responses) 35.6%
2004 (206 responses) 4.0%
2008 (1895 responses) 36.4%

5204 total responses (Results not scientific, but profoundly cub (that is so))

Mugabe '08!

[S]ome surveys require no analysis whatsoever. A good example emerged earlier today from the American Research Group, which asked Americans a number of questions on an issue that has been dominating headlines of late. One of them — “Do you think the national economy is getting better, staying the same, or getting worse? — was answered thusly:

No Americans say that the national economy is getting better, 13% say it is staying the same, and 82% say the national economy is getting worse.

In other words, zilch, zero, nothing (apart from the 5 percent who remain undecided). Not one glass half-full among the 1,100 people surveyed. The ruling was unanimous, and also obvious — economic news is routinely bad these days...

It was also slightly more agreement than Zimbabweans could muster when asked about their own economy, which failed long ago. In August, a Gallup poll showed the country’s bleak views on the economy, but 1 percent of 1,000 polled somehow held the view that things were getting better.

The longest rest of our lives...

Today's Polls, 9/12

Really, if the Dems can't win this year, stick a fork in 'em, they're done. Jesusland will have won. It's time for Barack to get in the gutter with Rove & Co. They put one of yours in the hospital, you put one of theirs in the morgue, that's the Chicago way. Really, no more futzing around. Got any "pictures" of McCain and his black baby? GO RIGHT DOWNTOWN AND PRINT IT. I dunno, BUT DO SOMETHING. And by SOMETHING i mean DURTY! I just can't imagine 8 years of McCain and 8 years of Palin. I'll be 59 for phokk's sake. Actually, if this all comes true i'll have either hung myself by that point, or will be held at an America Haters Internment Camp with K-Mad. If he hasn't moved to Europe by that point.

This is all to say, getting really really really really really worried at his point. Someone talk Smiff down off the ledge...

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I would say this is something to be very worried about...

...but since it's a poll by Zogby--who is profoundly brain dead--it's probably good news for Obama...

McCain takes lead over Obama in new poll

In a sharp turnaround, Republican John McCain has opened a 5-point lead on Democrat Barack Obama in the U.S. presidential race and is seen as a stronger manager of the economy, according to a Reuters/Zogby poll released on Wednesday. McCain leads Obama among likely U.S. voters by 46 percent to 41 percent, wiping out Obama's solid 7-point advantage in July and taking his first lead in the monthly Reuters/Zogby poll....
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whitey: fullas#i+

Only nine per cent of Americans say they'd be uncomfortable about electing a black president, the LA Times found -- but a majority say they "know someone" who feels this way: that's a standard pollster's technique to try to get around the unwillingness of respondents to admit to racist thoughts.

Also, I hear he is a Muslim

News item - Barack Obama may be the fresh face in this year's presidential election, but nearly half say they're already tired of hearing about him, a poll says.

Grandpa Fights Back

For the first time since shortly after clinching the Democratic nomination, we now have Barack Obama as less than a 60 percent favorite to win the election. Our simulations presently project Obama to win the election 58.4 percent of the time, with McCain winning the remaining 41.6 percent.

because he'll get tough with Czechoslovakia

And they trust him to deal at long last with the Habsburg Empire...

While 56 percent said Obama knows enough about world affairs to be a good president, more, 72 percent, said so about McCain. Pitted head-to-head on the issue, McCain was judged as the one with better knowledge of the world by a better than 2 to 1 margin.