WTF is wrong with us?

Stoooopid 'Mercans (cont)

Too many Whole Foods treats, so deer must leave Lake View - Chicago Sun-Times

A deer and two fawns living in a Lake View courtyard will be moved by Animal Control because residents continue to feed the babies milk from bottles and organic apples from Whole Foods. (Only the best organic stuff will do for Bambi - ed).

Feeding the animals could ultimately be harmful to the deer, and possibly to people if the doe came back and found them too near her babies, officials said.

Animal Control, which has been monitoring the situation for about a week, does not “normally get involved with a situation with a wild animal,” unless the animal is in danger or poses a threat, said City Animal Care and Control Commissioner Cherie Travis.

Since the deer were uninjured and were not bothering anyone, the agency left them alone, and asked area residents to do the same.

But residents couldn’t seem to leave nature to its own course.

“We just asked people not to feed them,” Travis said. “Unfortunately people did not heed our advice.”

The signs asking people not to feed the animals were taken down.

“We were aware people were feeding the fawns with a baby bottle (are you phokking kidding me? ed) when the mother was not there,” Travis said. This could be dangerous to the fawns and those feeding them, she explained.

If residents bring them food, the deer will make themselves comfortable there and that’s a possibility with the Lake View deer, Travis said. “People are going to Whole Foods and giving them organic apples.”

An additional concern, which Ald. Tom Tunney’s office contacted Animal Care about, was the gay pride parade on June 26, which is expected to bring hundreds of thousands of people to the neighborhood, some of whom could be inebriated. (so gays + alcohol = shitstorm of biblical proportions that the deer won't survive? ed)

So now the animals will be moved, but Travis said that is no easy proposition.

“We’re looking at a lot of different options to remove them as humanely (dey ain't hyoomans - ed)as possible,” she said. “We are exploring a lot of options, none of which are really good.”

If only we paid this much attention to hyooomans in need...

So now we know: 10% of Chicagoans are heartless, brain-dead Sox fans

Should Santo be inducted into the Hall?

In your estimation, should Ron Santo be inducted into the baseball Hall of Fame?

* Yes (7060 responses) 90%

* No (776 responses) 10%

7836 total responses

(Results not scientific)

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FUNG'S HAND-PICKED CANDIDATE???

Illinois Candidate's Name Misspelled As 'Rich Whitey' On Electronic-Voting Machines

There are typos and then there are complete and utter catastrophes.

The Chicago Sun-Times reports that the name of Green Party gubernatorial candidate Rich Whitney is misspelled "Rich Whitey" on electronic-voting machines in 23 wards -- "about half in predominantly African-American areas." The error only occurs on screens voters would see when they are reviewing their choices (Whitney's name appears correctly on the initial screens), but officials say the error cannot be corrected before election day.

Jim Allen, spokesman for the Chicago Board of Elections, told the Sun-Times he expects 90% of votes on election day to be cast on paper ballots -- minimizing the number of voters who would see the misspelling.

"I don't want to be identified as 'Whitey.' If this is happening in primarily African-American wards, that's an even bigger concern," Whitney told the Sun-Times. The paper says he's considering legal action. "I don't know if this is machine politics at play or why this happened."

The latest Rasmussen poll shows Whitney drawing just 2% of the vote.

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Guns!

Hooray. The City of Chicago and Oak Park can now form militias to prevent the Federal government from attacking us. Oh wait. No?

People in the City of Chicago and Oak Park can now own handguns to protect themselves from criminals [read: negros]. Oh well. An exciting ruling on its face, but considering we could already own long guns, not half as nearly interesting as everyone would have us believe. And frankly, if the people braking into your house have handguns themselves (and as a pointer to would-be-theives - carry a handgun - idiot) and can get the drop on you (In my house I have my 7 year old on the watch from midnight to 4 a.m. - I've got to work after all) then how does it matter.

I love the reaction on the interwebs though. The victory won't be complete until we can all concealed carry and until we can all carry fully automatic weapons to political rallies. Frankly, I'm hoping for access to weapons of mass destruction and a repeal of the laws outlawing cold-blooded murder. Only then will the victory be complete.

Brain-Dead WGN Listeners

The Obama Administration is investigating whether or not the CIA committed crimes while interogating detainees.

• This is worth looking back and taking care of. (223 responses)

  35.7%

• It was a nasty affair but the country is better served by looking forward. (401 responses)

  64.3%

624 total responses

(Results not scientific)

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Police Should be Given More Power

That must be one old looking 14 year old.

Add "common sense" to the list of things that ain't what they used to be...

Daley makes 'stupid face' to questions about his brother's relationship with Obama.
Daley blasts McCain ad
The mayor teed off today on John McCain for including his brother in a negative ad about Barack Obama's Chicago political roots. Daley warned that McCain has his own vulnerabilities, and said, "When you start throwing mud, mud is going to be thrown at you and it's going to be sticky."
Daley: Cut beer sales near ballparks (funny, funny stuff--ed.)
"What we're asking is common sense. You can drink as much beer for seven innings as you want," Daley said. "Give me a break. This is common sense, that's all it is. We're asking for the cooperation of everyone."
Asked what he would tell business owners who fear a loss of business, Daley replied, "I'll have somebody buy their place tomorrow ... If you've been drinking for five hours and you're laying on the floor, don't give that person another beer.
"I mean, give me a break ... It's not going to cost them any business. They made enough money all year, I'm sorry. We're just talking about common sense."
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Free at Last

R. Kelly acquitted on all 14 child pornography charges.

Can we all now agree that racism in this country is a thing of the past?

S#i+ blowing up world-wide and what is the 3rd most e-mailed "news story" at the Trib, the world's awfulest "newspaper" (tie)

2 Northwestern University students robbed at Evanston Burger King, police say