Friday, June 29, 2007

crackers...God love 'em

This had to be a bad bill if Bush was for it, and it's one of those ironic ironies that about 100% of the crackers in Gainesville, GA voted for him. Like, Billy Ray Smiff and his wife, Uraina, who don't like Mexicans at all...

Small-Town America Resists Latino Newcomers

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Smiff is angry, my friends

Still in DC...for two more phokking days. I'd rather stick needles in my eyes. Let's see who's to blame:

1) K-Mad (naturally)
2) K-Mad's boss (totally insane? just askin'...)
3) American Airlines (phokk dem)
4) Dallas--what, you get some rain and all flights west of the Mississippi shut down for two days?
5) While i'm at it, Texas. Let's Mess With Them. Isn't this the state which executes little old ladies for jaywalking? and they can't handle a little water? PHOKK DEM RIGHT DOWNTOWN AND PRINT IT!
6) DC. I think my flight tonight was cancelled because of some thunderstorms. Whatever. Wimps.
7) George W. Bush and Dick "Dick" (Dick!) Cheney (angle THIS, Dick)
8) Tom Skilling--just because of bad weather
9) Fung
10) The iPhone

udders laughed at, scorned, made fun of Smiff

Dose phokkers will be sorry...

Max Scherzer fanned 11 in six scoreless innings Wednesday for Double-A Tennessee. Scherzer was making his second start for Tennessee. In five outings since signing with the Diamondbacks on May 31, he has a 1.29 ERA and a 45/5 K/BB ratio in 28 innings. He seems like a real possibility to help out in the second half.

Lou is confused--SHOCKING!

Manager Lou Piniella mistakenly told the media that Kerry Wood's bullpen session on Tuesday was postponed, when it actually did take place prior to the rainstorm. Wood reportedly pitched okay during the session and will continue his rehab.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

breaks record by 60 games? - dats pretty good

Ryan Howard hit his 100th career homer Wednesday, breaking Ralph Kiner's record for the least amount of games to reach the century mark. According to the Elias Sports Bureau, Howard's three-run blast, that broke up a scoreless game in the fifth, gave him 100 homers in 325 career games -- 60 less games than it took Pirate great Kiner to hit the plateau in the late 40s.

Smiff forgot a "celebrity" before the Burger King

Today's 7th inning conductor: George Thorogood.

Which reminds me...

One bourbon, one scotch, one beer
No I ain't seen my baby since a nigh' and a week
Gotta get drunk man till I can't even speak
Gonna get high man listen to me
One drink ain't enough Jack you better make it three
I wanna get drunk I'm gonna make it real clear
I want one bourbon, one scotch and one beer
One bourbon, one scotch, one beer
(repeat about 50 times)


I drink alone, yeah,
with nobody else
I drink alone, yeah,
with nobody else
You know when I drink alone,
I prefer to be by myself


No brainer

Everybody's a Critic and That Seems to Include QT (cont'd):

The best movie recently out on DVD that no one saw in the theaters:


It explains everything.

road trip?

News Item: North Korean film festival in Pyongyang offers the premiere of "Respected Comrade Kim Jong Il Is a Great Thinker and Theoretician."

It's official: the Cubs have run out of celebrities to promote

The Subway guy, Jared Fogel, was featured in the 3rd inning today. Who's next, the creepy Burger King dude?

they call him "The Angler" for a reason...

News Item (2002): "Cheney asserts executive privilege."
News Item (2007): "Cheney won't follow executive order, says he's part of legislative branch."

Rep. Dennis Kucinich (D-Ohio) explaining in 2003 why he was against an Iraq invasion: "The question in my mind is how many additional American casualties is Saddam worth? And the answer is not that damned many."

Then again, what do you expect from-- No. Wait. That was Secretary of Defense Dick Cheney explaining in 1992 why he was against an Iraq invasion. Back when he was in the executive branch.

Act of God?

Kerry Wood's bullpen session originally scheduled for Tuesday was postponed due to an afternoon downpour.
Wood will likely attempt to complete the side session on Wednesday, barring an earthquake, hurricane, or locusts.

Earth to Shea Hillenbrand: "You SUCK!"

Shea Hillenbrand said Tuesday that he'd like to be traded if the Angels don't plan to give him regular playing time.
"I feel like I'm being pushed aside, put on a back-burner, and I don't like that at all," Hillenbrand said. "If I'm not going to play here, give me enough respect to trade me or get rid of me. I think I deserve that. I'm a quality player in the prime of my career. To go from playing every day to not playing at all, it's very disheartening."

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Burning River Bandits go 3-3 against this.

This week's opposing players' major league stats, weighted by Scoresheet playing time vs. your team:
2.27 ERA, 7.1 H/9IP; .321 BA, .379 OBA, .550 SlgA

Sunday, June 24, 2007

we are living in a golden age (cont'd)

News item: Hostess announces banana cream Twinkies