Saturday, December 11, 2010

I'm not sure even Jimmy Boeheim can down a cupcake DIS YOOOOGE

(AP) -- Syracuse may be unbeaten and coming off an impressive performance against a fellow Top 10 team, but Jim Boeheim feels improvement is needed.

He should get plenty of it against winless Colgate.

The eighth-ranked Orange look to extend their winning streak over the Raiders to a whopping 45 when the upstate New York neighbors meet at the Carrier Dome on Saturday night.

Friday, December 10, 2010

K-Mad will be happy to know

Almost 3 years later, we're still number 1 on Google for golf/plutocracy nexus. Didn't Briggs have a band by that name?

Hey Wisconsin, get to know your new Senator - you sure as hell deserve him

How did this jackass beat Feingold again? Was everyone drunk? Wait... that could be it actually...

Ron Johnson, R-Lobbyists

Sen.-elect Ron Johnson promised to change how Wisconsin is represented in Washington.

And he is doing just that.

Johnson narrowly defeated U.S. Sen. Russ Feingold, D-Wis., who was the chamber’s chief advocate for the sort of lobbying and ethics reforms that would limit the power of special-interest groups and eliminate pay-to-play politics. Feingold’s refusal to play Washington-insider games led to his being labeled by Washingtonian magazine as “the number one enemy of lobbyists in Washington.”

Johnson won’t be so labeled.

The new Republican senator has announced that his chief of staff will be Don Kent, a former vice president at Navigators Global LLC.

What’s Navigators Global LLC? A Washington-based power broker operation that describes itself as “an elite team of federal lobbyists, political strategists and communications experts.”

That’s right. Ron Johnson has put a lobbyist in charge of his Senate office...

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Baseball's most brain-dead player: we have a winner

Answer Man: Luke Scott talks Nugent, hunting and Obama origin

Baltimore Orioles slugger Luke Scott stopped by baseball's winter meetings Tuesday and, after some harmless chatter about his team's offseason dealings, stated with conviction that President Barack Obama was not born in the United States.

Oh, yes, he did. Scott's opinion about the president's birthplace — while certainly not unique — was a stunning climax to a friendly and frank 20-minute Answer Man session that spanned his enthusiasm for baseball, hunting, firearms, personal responsibility and smaller government....

LS: Obama ... hmm ... Obama does not represent America. Nor does he represent anything what our forefathers stood for. This country is basically built on an attitude. It's a way of life. It's not because you're born here. It's not that you're supposed to take from those who have and give to those who haven't. That kills a country. It killed Russia....

[the comments have been turned off for this story]

Come on, Luke, just say it: he's black!

Now with audio. Sounds dumber than it reads.

Dis just in... President Obama: Back up for a second, Gibbsy. Baltimore still has a baseball team?


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Alan Simpson: student ...

of the Rummy School of Poetry:

We took a big banana
and threw it into the gorilla cage
and the gorilla picked it up, like they do —
they peel it, mash it, play with it,
but they will eat some

-- Alan Simpson, on the work of the fiscal commission he co-chaired

Only in America (cont)

30,000 Cuban cigars seized at O'Hare - Chicago Breaking News

U.S. customs officials say they've seized 30,000 Cuban cigars shipped from Europe to O'Hare International Airport in the past two weeks and are inspecting another 70,000 they also suspect are from Cuba.

The flood of the "popular contraband" is the biggest seen at the Customs and Border Protection's Chicago field office, which typically seizes 10 to 12 cigars a week at the O'Hare international mail facility, officials said.

It's illegal to import any Cuban product into the United States without a license from the U.S. Treasury Department (wonder how hard it is to get one of dose, is it as hard as getting a marijuana stamp? - ed).

"Our officers stationed at (Customs and Border Protection) mail facilities routinely discover and seize a variety of contraband arriving from all over the world, but this is the first time in Chicago we have seen this level of activity involving illegal cigars," said David Murphy, director of field operations for the Chicago field office.

Customs officers have confirmed that 30,000 cigars are of Cuban origin and are still sorting through 70,000, said Brian Bell, a Customs spokesman.

The seized cigars will be destroyed, officials said (what a phokking waste, unless, of course, they are destroyed one at a time - ed).

Apprently the spike was due to some sort of rule change the gubmint made because of something the terrists did - maybe that toner cartridge thing. So once again, the terrists have won.

Life in Oklahoma

Shariah at the Kumback Café

"There's just too much Muslim influence, all this Shariah law..."

Yes, that sounds like Oklahoma... sure... Muslims running everything... we hatesez that too...

I asked Frank Lawson, 83, about Obama. "I think the young man’s a Muslim," he said. (If dis blog had a nickel for every time... Ed.) ... "I got on the computer, punched in Koran, and there it is in black and white: They are out to rule the world and if you don’t convert, they kill you." (Was dat on dat Christian Google? Ed.)

But I thought Smiff was already awesome

What's in a name? Man goes from Smith to Awesome

An Oregon man has had an Awesome name change.

Douglas Allen Smith Jr. says he changed his name to Captain Awesome last month because he was inspired by the nickname of a character on the NBC television show "Chuck" — Dr. Devon "Captain Awesome" Woodcomb.

Monday, December 6, 2010

We won't have the Toddster to kick around anymore

And unlike Nixon, it's hard to foresee some dramatic career turnaround, though there's probably an elementary school somewhere in town looking for a new hall monitor.

At least he's going out classy!

Preckwinkle says when her staffers requested information, they got mounds of unorganized or incomplete paper, among other issues.

Cook County government has never had a reputation for squeaky clean dealings, but things appeared to get worse under Stroger. A court-ordered monitor says he violated political hiring more than 150 times since 2008.

"Chicago is not the most corrupt American city. It's the most theatrically corrupt."
-- Studs Terkel