Never stopped Santo

Hawk, after the Sox lose to complete the sweep by the Twinkies up dere in the Metrodome: "This ballpark...I wish I could cuss right now."

Was Todd Hollandsworth not available?

White Sox land Kotsay for Anderson
Veteran outfielder should provide help off the bench in Chicago

MINNEAPOLIS -- Brian Anderson got his wish to be traded, and in the process, the White Sox apparently have added a valuable veteran piece to their bench for the playoff push over the next two months.

Anderson, 27, was traded to Boston in exchange for Mark Kotsay and cash considerations on Tuesday. Kotsay, 33, is a .281 hitter with 110 home runs and 614 RBIs over 13 Major League seasons. He batted .257 with one homer and five RBIs in 27 games for the Red Sox in 2009 before being designated for assignment on July 24.

Annudder riduculous poll

Dere's a poll on the Facebooks asking if welfare recipients should take a drug test first. Has anyone taken it? If so, please report the results. I can't bring myself to take the poll. It's tooooo stooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooopid.

K-Mad won't have him to kick around any longer

WASHINGTON (AP) — Sen. Jim Bunning says he will not run for re-election in 2010.

sounds like he's part of the conspiracy

“Twenty-five percent of my people believe the Pentagon and Rumsfeld were responsible for taking the twin towers down,” said Rep. Collin Peterson, a Democrat who represents a conservative Republican district in Minnesota. “That’s why I don’t do town meetings.”

Growth Industry

Swedish lesbians suck sperm banks dry

They'll have two mommies AND be Danish? No, shouldn't cause any problems on the playground...

Intensity: Good if You're Pale; Bad if you're not

Yesterday was the 26th anniversary of the "Pine Tar" game. I'm sure we've all seen the replay of George Brett going batshit insane hundreds of times. My question is this: Why is Brett's charging out of the dugout with murder in his eyes, his anger so manifest that he has to be physically restrained and pulled away from the umpire, viewed as evidence of his virtue while Milton Bradley having to be physically restrained and pulled away from an umpire who not only blew a call but then baited him viewed as evidence of his insanity and lack of virtue?

Even I could hit a 25mph fastball

News item: Japanese professor creates baseball-playing robots

"The pitching robot throws a plastic foam ball at 25 miles per hour, but Ishikawa is hoping to increase the speed to 93 mph and make it able to throw off-speed pitches like curves and sliders."

Yes, well, I'm working on that too...

"Ishikawa is also working on getting the batting robot to be able to hit to all parts of the field."

Good luck teaching it to "do the little things" or "give 110 percent."

LeBron for President!

CLEVELAND (AP) -- LeBron James struggled with sudden fame after appearing on Sports Illustrated's cover as a 17-year-old and admits he smoked marijuana during his junior year in high school.

Fung def Sarge, Corporal

Well, we're back from the state that finally voted correctly, which we got to thru the state that nobody thought would vote correctly, but we're very glad they did. Fungster did well, defeating Sarge & Corporal and taking lotsa pictures in the process, other than the ones the vanquished took when we were giving them a false sense of security. Details, of course, are at the Spades Marathon blog site, so if you really want to snooze...

Did you know that you could send emails to the blog and they would appear as posts? Fung was struggling with trying to type in stuff in the small ass window on his Google phone (you'd think that the Google phone and the blogger, both owned by the Google, would be a match made in heaven, right? Nope.). Not to mention that some guy was screaming in his ear about how every single drive on that road at that time was a freaking moron and didn't know how to drive. But once he figgered dat out, things were much easier. Except for labeling of course, but you can do that afterward. Or just let Smiff do it for you.

Also, this I believe brings us up to 10 posts for the week. 10 posts? That's like a deluge! If we double them to 20, that will be like the most since like February or something! Oh, W. We miss you, and Dick (Dick) "Dick" Dick, and Condi, and Rummy, and Turblossom, and all those other guys that made this blog possible.

Not mentioned: A whole buncha guys who couldn't give a phokk about Spades, Briggs.

This is your brain on HGH

Does Lou Dobbs ever get tired of being right all the time?

LOU DOBBS: “[T]he stock market has lost 20 percent since this president was sworn in. He has his own bear market. That’s the definition of a bear market, a 20 percent decline. This is now the Obama bear market.” [CNN, 3/9/09]


News item: "The stock market soared to its highest level since November Thursday..."


J.P. Freire: ‘I Can’t Remember Anyone Saying’ The Bear Market Was Obama’s Fault

It's so hard to tell the bad books apart from the good books -- couldn't we just burn down the whole libarry just to be safe?

Library fight riles up city, leads to book-burning demand

Outside West Bend, the fight caught the attention of Robert Braun, who, with three other Milwaukee-area men, filed a claim against West Bend calling for one of the library's books to be publicly burned, along with financial damages.

The four plaintiffs -- who describe themselves as "elderly" in their complaint --- claim their "mental and emotional well-being was damaged by [the] book at the library."
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Put that on the board

Apologies if you used one of those recordificating machines to recordify the proceedings..

Buehrle completes perfect game to throttle Rays

A shocking percentage of Lou Dobbs viewers agreed with Lou Dobbs last night (cont'd)

Would you trust your senator or congressman with a secret?
Yes 5% 482
No 95% 8526
Total Votes: 9008
Though delightfully inane, this is not a scientific poll

On the other hand, if Michael Medved thinks you're a nutburger, you might be a really YOOOGE nutburger.

Unlike Dobbs, some conservative media think birthers are "nutburgers"
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JAMBA JUICE PHOKKING SUCKS: IT'S LIKE DIAHHAREA

No Justice, Part II: Boycott Jamba Juice!
2:30 PM, 7/16/09
Even MORE no justice? How much more no justice can we take? Thanks to everyone who forwarded this Jamba Juice advertisemo-tainment:
This is an online animated video about going on some kind of stupid “Jamba Juice vacation” in your cubicle....

SHOCKING NEWS

Briggs is leaving the country again. And once again it's to a country I've never been. One minute Quinny and I are begging him to get a passport, next thing you know he's actually using the damn thing. Truly shocking.

A Random Thought Driving Through West Virginia

So, I was cruising down I-75 on my way to Lexington, KY and I passed a Golden Corral.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't you put cows in a corral? Is this really the best name they could come up with for a buffet? Are the executives making fun of the people who eat there?

Does Jimmy Boeheim know about this?

150-pound Minn. cupcake sets Guinness record
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I phink not -- "Calling it 'The Big Willie' fine with Willis CEO"

Calling it 'The Big Willie' fine with Willis CEO

(Crain's) — Call it "Big Willie," Joseph Plumeri says of his latest high-profile acquisition, the naming rights to Sears Tower.