Hmmm, maybe the New York Fucking Times will give Dumbya his own column, too...
Bill Kristol is rewarded for being “wrong” on everything: NY Times gig is a comin’
This is really sick - especially when you consider it is happening at a time when the country is clearly moving more progressive, and there are so many good progressive columnists who have guest columned for the Times before (Ehrenreich, Katha Pollit, Tom Frank, etc.).
Either way - it is an absolute abomination from the standpoint of basic accountability. A pundit being factually wrong on almost everything he hung his hat on is rewarded by the largest newspaper in the world for his track record. If ever there was an example of the world of journalism literally thumbing its nose at basic accountability, this example of Bill Kristol falling up is it.
Sunday, December 30, 2007
The New York Times Crawls Into the Gutter Agtain...
on hiring William Kristol:
To Whom It May Concern,
It is not so much my vehement disagreement with the beliefs of William Kristol that compels me to write against his hiring, it is his intellectual laziness and obvious and unquestioning partisanship, better suited for formats that seek profit through shrill pronouncements and simplifications rather than clarity and understanding through reporting. Perhaps this is the direction of your newspaper, it is not a direction I am comfortable with, nor one that does justice to conservative political beliefs. He lacks intellectual stamina and often fails to parse arguments with any kind of sophistication.
For instance, in his article "The 2008 Formula," a dismal piece that appeared in Time Magazine (for which he was paid to write an article that said exactly nothing) he argued that this was a "war election" and that war elections typically engendered results favoring hawkish candidates. Fair enough. What his argument ignored was how central the idea of winning the war was to Americans during these elections, in which, whether it was defeating fascists or communists (for naively, we thought communism was what we were fighting in Viet Nam and Korea and not anti-imperialist nationalism with totalitarian overtones, less communist than we could believe), we felt the future survival of America was at stake. Kristol has failed here and elsewhere to understand that Iraq is not central to Americans' idea of winning against terrorism. Winning Pakistan is more central, winning Saudi Arabia and Iran are more central, and to a lesser extent, winning states unstable and easily belligerent like North Korea. Americans understand these will be the future battlegrounds where terrorism will either flourish or dissapate, and the battles to contain terrorism will be fought not so much with weapons and attempts to force others to bend to our ways, but through deal-making, diplomacy and hard bargains on both sides. Sacrifices will have to be made, and for sure, the might of the United States must back up its desire to create stability and destroy havens of terrorism, but the policies Kristol has supported with weak argument and false evidences have completely failed. Kristol's columns, here particularly, relied on a basic fallacy common in arguments that use history: the fallacy of historical analogy.
Comparing one thing to another in a straightforward statement that takes into account none of the external factors in the case of either thing is a common mistake often leading to a misunderstanding both of history and of the current object of study (like Iraq). Americans understand this and they understand that the paranoias of 1952 and 1968 led only to more heartache and often, half-baked and self-destructive policies (vietnamization, Abu Ghraib, HUAC and other needless and painful reminders that democratic principles remain things to be aspired to rather than bedrocks of our country), and I believe that most Americans don't see the future of Iraq leading to a victorious conclusion in the war on terror - they see it for what it most probably is: a disastrous detour that stole much needed resources from the war on terror as well as the struggle to create an America that can keep up with the rapidly progressing Europe and Asia. The "war on terror" remains most what it should not be: a long wet kiss to the various cartels that control so much of America today.
The idea that a New York Times columnist would be so lazy as to make the kind of sophistry evident in the above cited article, in which history is so sloppily compared and contrasted, and in which a conclusion is so cavalierly arrived at, is depressing. Can anybody write for the New York Times? Who's next? Bill O'Reilly?
I understand that the New York Times is committed to the illusion of a neutral point of view in its reporting, and to the idea of offering room on its pages to "both sides of an argument." This would work if you hired people who were not partisan, but genuinely philosophical, married to ideas rather than interest groups and parties. People who were not afraid of complexities and who could think with any kind of empathy. You are offering the reputation of your paper to a writer who deserves neither that aura of respectability nor the space on your pages that could be offered to any number of more well qualified persons.
The decision to hire William Kristol represents another low point in this first decade of the 21st century of your paper's history. Not a decade that will make the future editors of the New York Times proud of the legacy they carry. Perhaps, we can hope though, they will be inspired to commit to a more rigorous examination of the news than this generation's editors. I pray that the New York Times will, at some point, take its responsibilities to report the news that is rather than the news certain policy groups and political parties wish it to be, more seriously.
best wishes,
Sarge
Brooklyn, NY
To Whom It May Concern,
It is not so much my vehement disagreement with the beliefs of William Kristol that compels me to write against his hiring, it is his intellectual laziness and obvious and unquestioning partisanship, better suited for formats that seek profit through shrill pronouncements and simplifications rather than clarity and understanding through reporting. Perhaps this is the direction of your newspaper, it is not a direction I am comfortable with, nor one that does justice to conservative political beliefs. He lacks intellectual stamina and often fails to parse arguments with any kind of sophistication.
For instance, in his article "The 2008 Formula," a dismal piece that appeared in Time Magazine (for which he was paid to write an article that said exactly nothing) he argued that this was a "war election" and that war elections typically engendered results favoring hawkish candidates. Fair enough. What his argument ignored was how central the idea of winning the war was to Americans during these elections, in which, whether it was defeating fascists or communists (for naively, we thought communism was what we were fighting in Viet Nam and Korea and not anti-imperialist nationalism with totalitarian overtones, less communist than we could believe), we felt the future survival of America was at stake. Kristol has failed here and elsewhere to understand that Iraq is not central to Americans' idea of winning against terrorism. Winning Pakistan is more central, winning Saudi Arabia and Iran are more central, and to a lesser extent, winning states unstable and easily belligerent like North Korea. Americans understand these will be the future battlegrounds where terrorism will either flourish or dissapate, and the battles to contain terrorism will be fought not so much with weapons and attempts to force others to bend to our ways, but through deal-making, diplomacy and hard bargains on both sides. Sacrifices will have to be made, and for sure, the might of the United States must back up its desire to create stability and destroy havens of terrorism, but the policies Kristol has supported with weak argument and false evidences have completely failed. Kristol's columns, here particularly, relied on a basic fallacy common in arguments that use history: the fallacy of historical analogy.
Comparing one thing to another in a straightforward statement that takes into account none of the external factors in the case of either thing is a common mistake often leading to a misunderstanding both of history and of the current object of study (like Iraq). Americans understand this and they understand that the paranoias of 1952 and 1968 led only to more heartache and often, half-baked and self-destructive policies (vietnamization, Abu Ghraib, HUAC and other needless and painful reminders that democratic principles remain things to be aspired to rather than bedrocks of our country), and I believe that most Americans don't see the future of Iraq leading to a victorious conclusion in the war on terror - they see it for what it most probably is: a disastrous detour that stole much needed resources from the war on terror as well as the struggle to create an America that can keep up with the rapidly progressing Europe and Asia. The "war on terror" remains most what it should not be: a long wet kiss to the various cartels that control so much of America today.
The idea that a New York Times columnist would be so lazy as to make the kind of sophistry evident in the above cited article, in which history is so sloppily compared and contrasted, and in which a conclusion is so cavalierly arrived at, is depressing. Can anybody write for the New York Times? Who's next? Bill O'Reilly?
I understand that the New York Times is committed to the illusion of a neutral point of view in its reporting, and to the idea of offering room on its pages to "both sides of an argument." This would work if you hired people who were not partisan, but genuinely philosophical, married to ideas rather than interest groups and parties. People who were not afraid of complexities and who could think with any kind of empathy. You are offering the reputation of your paper to a writer who deserves neither that aura of respectability nor the space on your pages that could be offered to any number of more well qualified persons.
The decision to hire William Kristol represents another low point in this first decade of the 21st century of your paper's history. Not a decade that will make the future editors of the New York Times proud of the legacy they carry. Perhaps, we can hope though, they will be inspired to commit to a more rigorous examination of the news than this generation's editors. I pray that the New York Times will, at some point, take its responsibilities to report the news that is rather than the news certain policy groups and political parties wish it to be, more seriously.
best wishes,
Sarge
Brooklyn, NY
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Factoid of the day
The fear of the number 666 is known as hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia.
US town escapes 666 phone prefix
US town escapes 666 phone prefix
End Times for Martians?
Asteroid's odds of hitting Mars at 4%
"I think it'll be cool," said Don Yeomans, who heads the Near-Earth Object Program at NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory.
"I think it'll be cool," said Don Yeomans, who heads the Near-Earth Object Program at NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory.
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Well, Merry Christmas Zimbabwe, I guess..
Bleak Christmas for Zimbabweans
* Story Highlights
* Inflation-- the world's highest -- was about 8,000 percent officially in September
* Acute shortages of food and gasoline continue
* Power cuts added to the holiday misery
* Next Article in World (move along, nothing to see here) »
HARARE, Zimbabwe (AP) -- Thousands of Zimbabweans waited for hours to get scarce currency from the banks so they could buy food and board buses on Monday for Christmas trips to their home villages.
[picture of many people waiting, looking pissed off] A riot police officer monitors people in a bank line on the day before Christmas in Harare, Zimbabwe on Monday.
"We call this the festive season but where is there any joy?" said housewife and mother Mildred Chikutu, who got into a line before dawn to withdraw the maximum allowed in a day, 50 million Zimbabwe dollars -- 25 U.S. dollars at the dominant black market rate -- enough to buy a hamburger.
"You queue for money, and that's only the beginning of the queuing," she said, heading into a nearby supermarket where many shelves were bare of basic goods. A line had formed at the bakery counter.
Inflation-- the world's highest -- was about 8,000 percent officially in September, but independent estimates put it nearer 100,000 percent.
With cash itself in short supply, the central bank has supplied new high denomination notes, the largest worth 750,000 Zimbabwe dollars -- about 37 U.S. cents at the black market rate. Banks still could not cope with the demand for cash after six weeks of acute shortages, and stayed open throughout Sunday to deal with withdrawal requests.
Power cuts, a continuing problem in Zimbabwe, added to the holiday misery.
Several suburbs in Harare, the capital, entered a 17th day without power, and large areas of the downtown business district, including the state power utility's headquarters, suffered intermittent outages. Officials at the main blood bank said some stocks were thrown away after a refrigeration generator broke down.
Even President Robert Mugabe's official residence went without power from the city power grid for more than a week before it was restored. But he also has a private mansion on the outskirts of the capital.
The internationally known Harare Club canceled its Christmas lunch during a six-day power outage.
Cars snaked around a gas station a block away awaiting a fuel delivery.
Dampened by overnight rains at the main Mbare long-distance bus terminal in the capital, thousands waited for buses to their villages. But the lines were smaller than in the past, as fares soared and acute shortages of food and gasoline continued.
[picture of miserable looking people loading a truck] Townspeople take chicken, sugar and other scarce commodities to rural relatives for the holidays.
Power and water outages occur daily across the country, blamed on shortages of spare parts, equipment and hard currency for electricity imports.
Zimbabwe was the breadbasket of the region and one of the world's top exporters of tobacco until the government seized white farmlands that were given mainly to cronies of Mugabe and his entourage, creating food shortages and a crisis that led a third of the population to flee the country.
Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.
* Story Highlights
* Inflation-- the world's highest -- was about 8,000 percent officially in September
* Acute shortages of food and gasoline continue
* Power cuts added to the holiday misery
* Next Article in World (move along, nothing to see here) »
HARARE, Zimbabwe (AP) -- Thousands of Zimbabweans waited for hours to get scarce currency from the banks so they could buy food and board buses on Monday for Christmas trips to their home villages.
[picture of many people waiting, looking pissed off] A riot police officer monitors people in a bank line on the day before Christmas in Harare, Zimbabwe on Monday.
"We call this the festive season but where is there any joy?" said housewife and mother Mildred Chikutu, who got into a line before dawn to withdraw the maximum allowed in a day, 50 million Zimbabwe dollars -- 25 U.S. dollars at the dominant black market rate -- enough to buy a hamburger.
"You queue for money, and that's only the beginning of the queuing," she said, heading into a nearby supermarket where many shelves were bare of basic goods. A line had formed at the bakery counter.
Inflation-- the world's highest -- was about 8,000 percent officially in September, but independent estimates put it nearer 100,000 percent.
With cash itself in short supply, the central bank has supplied new high denomination notes, the largest worth 750,000 Zimbabwe dollars -- about 37 U.S. cents at the black market rate. Banks still could not cope with the demand for cash after six weeks of acute shortages, and stayed open throughout Sunday to deal with withdrawal requests.
Power cuts, a continuing problem in Zimbabwe, added to the holiday misery.
Several suburbs in Harare, the capital, entered a 17th day without power, and large areas of the downtown business district, including the state power utility's headquarters, suffered intermittent outages. Officials at the main blood bank said some stocks were thrown away after a refrigeration generator broke down.
Even President Robert Mugabe's official residence went without power from the city power grid for more than a week before it was restored. But he also has a private mansion on the outskirts of the capital.
The internationally known Harare Club canceled its Christmas lunch during a six-day power outage.
Cars snaked around a gas station a block away awaiting a fuel delivery.
Dampened by overnight rains at the main Mbare long-distance bus terminal in the capital, thousands waited for buses to their villages. But the lines were smaller than in the past, as fares soared and acute shortages of food and gasoline continued.
[picture of miserable looking people loading a truck] Townspeople take chicken, sugar and other scarce commodities to rural relatives for the holidays.
Power and water outages occur daily across the country, blamed on shortages of spare parts, equipment and hard currency for electricity imports.
Zimbabwe was the breadbasket of the region and one of the world's top exporters of tobacco until the government seized white farmlands that were given mainly to cronies of Mugabe and his entourage, creating food shortages and a crisis that led a third of the population to flee the country.
Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.
Monday, December 24, 2007
"It does not go far enough"
It's like baseball managers...From Frank Rich's Sunday column at the New York Times:
Whatever Mrs. Clinton’s experience as first lady or senator, what matters most in any case is not its sheer volume, that 35 years she keeps citing. It’s what she did or did not learn along the way that counts. That’s why one of the most revealing debate passages so far came in an exchange that earned much laughter but scant scrutiny this month in Des Moines.
This was the moment when Mr. Obama was asked how he could deliver a clean break from the past while relying on “so many Clinton advisers.” Mrs. Clinton jokingly called out, “I want to hear that,” prompting Mr. Obama to one-up her by responding, “Well, Hillary, I’m looking forward to you advising me, as well.”
Well, touché. But what was left unexamined beneath the levity was a revealing distinction between these two candidates. The questioner was right: Mr. Obama, like Mrs. Clinton, has indeed turned to former Clintonites for foreign-policy advice. But the Clinton players were not homogeneous, and who ended up with which ’08 candidate is instructive.
The principal foreign-policy Clinton alumni in Mr. Obama’s campaign include Susan Rice, a former assistant secretary of state, and Tony Lake, the former national security adviser and a prewar skeptic who said publicly in February 2003 that the Bush administration had not made the case that Saddam was an “imminent threat.” Ms. Rice, in an eloquent speech in November 2002, said that the Bush administration was “trying to change the subject to Iraq” from the war against Al Qaeda and warned that if it tried to fight both wars at once, “one, if not both, will suffer.” Her text now reads as a bookend to Mr. Obama’s senatorial campaign speech challenging the wisdom of the war only weeks earlier that same fall.
Mrs. Clinton’s current team was less prescient. Though it includes one of the earlier military critics of Bush policy, Gen. Wesley Clark, he is balanced by Gen. Jack Keane, an author of the Bush “surge.” The Clinton campaign’s foreign policy and national security director is a former Madeleine Albright aide, Lee Feinstein, who in November 2002 was gullible enough to say on CNBC that “we should take the president at his word, which is that he sees war as a last resort” — an argument anticipating the one Mrs. Clinton still uses to defend her vote on the Iraq war authorization.
In late April 2003, a week before “Mission Accomplished,” Mr. Feinstein could be found on CNN saying that he was “fairly confident” that W.M.D. would turn up in Iraq. Asked if the war would be a failure if no weapons were found, he said, “I don’t think that that’s a situation we’ll confront.” Forced to confront exactly that situation over the next year, he dug in deeper, co-writing an essay for Foreign Affairs (available on its Web site) arguing that “the biggest problem with the Bush pre-emption strategy may be that it does not go far enough.”
Whatever Mrs. Clinton’s experience as first lady or senator, what matters most in any case is not its sheer volume, that 35 years she keeps citing. It’s what she did or did not learn along the way that counts. That’s why one of the most revealing debate passages so far came in an exchange that earned much laughter but scant scrutiny this month in Des Moines.
This was the moment when Mr. Obama was asked how he could deliver a clean break from the past while relying on “so many Clinton advisers.” Mrs. Clinton jokingly called out, “I want to hear that,” prompting Mr. Obama to one-up her by responding, “Well, Hillary, I’m looking forward to you advising me, as well.”
Well, touché. But what was left unexamined beneath the levity was a revealing distinction between these two candidates. The questioner was right: Mr. Obama, like Mrs. Clinton, has indeed turned to former Clintonites for foreign-policy advice. But the Clinton players were not homogeneous, and who ended up with which ’08 candidate is instructive.
The principal foreign-policy Clinton alumni in Mr. Obama’s campaign include Susan Rice, a former assistant secretary of state, and Tony Lake, the former national security adviser and a prewar skeptic who said publicly in February 2003 that the Bush administration had not made the case that Saddam was an “imminent threat.” Ms. Rice, in an eloquent speech in November 2002, said that the Bush administration was “trying to change the subject to Iraq” from the war against Al Qaeda and warned that if it tried to fight both wars at once, “one, if not both, will suffer.” Her text now reads as a bookend to Mr. Obama’s senatorial campaign speech challenging the wisdom of the war only weeks earlier that same fall.
Mrs. Clinton’s current team was less prescient. Though it includes one of the earlier military critics of Bush policy, Gen. Wesley Clark, he is balanced by Gen. Jack Keane, an author of the Bush “surge.” The Clinton campaign’s foreign policy and national security director is a former Madeleine Albright aide, Lee Feinstein, who in November 2002 was gullible enough to say on CNBC that “we should take the president at his word, which is that he sees war as a last resort” — an argument anticipating the one Mrs. Clinton still uses to defend her vote on the Iraq war authorization.
In late April 2003, a week before “Mission Accomplished,” Mr. Feinstein could be found on CNN saying that he was “fairly confident” that W.M.D. would turn up in Iraq. Asked if the war would be a failure if no weapons were found, he said, “I don’t think that that’s a situation we’ll confront.” Forced to confront exactly that situation over the next year, he dug in deeper, co-writing an essay for Foreign Affairs (available on its Web site) arguing that “the biggest problem with the Bush pre-emption strategy may be that it does not go far enough.”
Sunday, December 23, 2007
not in photo: Smiff
Photo caption: Uniformed members of the "St. George Spirits Special Forces Tactical Alcohol Consumption Squad" Jennifer Wylie (left), Kevin Roche, and Johanna Mead sample absinthe at the St. George Spirits distillery in Alameda, California on Friday. Hundreds of customers waited hours for the chance to buy the first U.S. made and sold absinthe since 1912.
aka Smiff's Beer
Coronado Brewing's Idiot IPA
The CBC Idiot IPA is an all natural India Pale Ale. A big beer with an 8.5% ABV and brewed with over 3 lbs of hops per barrel. Watch out, this unfiltered "San Diego IPA" has been known to reduce even the most intelligent to a blithering "idiot".
The CBC Idiot IPA is an all natural India Pale Ale. A big beer with an 8.5% ABV and brewed with over 3 lbs of hops per barrel. Watch out, this unfiltered "San Diego IPA" has been known to reduce even the most intelligent to a blithering "idiot".
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Friday, December 21, 2007
I am shocked--SHOCKED!
UCSD dropped my current HMO, so now i'm with CIGNA...i guess i better not, well, need health care...
My new "health care provider"
A seventeen-year-old needs a LIVER TRANSPLANT and the insurance company is making up their mind whether to pay for it....
She died yesterday.
My new "health care provider"
A seventeen-year-old needs a LIVER TRANSPLANT and the insurance company is making up their mind whether to pay for it....
She died yesterday.
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Prior headed to the Yankees
Senior vice president Lyin' Hank "The Liar" Steinbrenner lied Wednesday that the Yankees are unlikely to pursue Mark Prior. "We kind of looked into it, but at this point, no," Steinbrenner lied.
Who's the bigger distraction?
T.O. 48%
Jessica 52%
The ESPN poll had Jessica winning down south, T.O winning up north. IL was too close to call.
Also, Skip Bayless is on ESPN??? Doing the Hot Seat segment??? Add Sportscenter to the list of things that ain't what they used to be... Though most would say the ship had already sailed on dat show...
Jessica 52%
The ESPN poll had Jessica winning down south, T.O winning up north. IL was too close to call.
Also, Skip Bayless is on ESPN??? Doing the Hot Seat segment??? Add Sportscenter to the list of things that ain't what they used to be... Though most would say the ship had already sailed on dat show...
pinko commie girlyman calls for socialized medicine
Gov. stumps for health reform
Hoping to build public support for a health insurance reform package, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger visits a local Kaiser Permanente hospital to implore Californians to rally behind his efforts. He's joined by Democratic state House Speaker Fabian Nunez.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Are Fung & Decker in T.O.'s America haters camp?
Terrell Owens says he's got a "message" for Jessica Simpson when the Cowboys make the playoffs, so "just stay tuned." "Right now, Jessica Simpson is not a fan favorite in this locker room or in Texas Stadium," T.O. said. "I think with everything that has happened, and obviously the way Tony (Romo) played and the comparison between her and Carrie Underwood, I think a lot of people feel like she's probably taking his focus away. Other than that, she was at the top of my list until last week."
She's still on the top of Smiff's list, haters, especially after she jinxed Romo and T.O. Also, she one helluva of an actress, she wears underwear (“I always wear underwear. It’s a personal rule.”), and she's a proud American (see below). Other than that, her large chestal area.
She's still on the top of Smiff's list, haters, especially after she jinxed Romo and T.O. Also, she one helluva of an actress, she wears underwear (“I always wear underwear. It’s a personal rule.”), and she's a proud American (see below). Other than that, her large chestal area.
Those against this (Fung, Decker) hate America.
this is the new Michigan head coach?
The guy who only needed to beat a very mediocre Pittsburgh team (coached by Wanny!) at home to advance to this year's title game.
And that's the new Weasels' head coach? MF@.
And that's the new Weasels' head coach? MF@.
someone want to explain dis?
Corms sez: "Smiff is gonna run outa games by the All-Star break."
Under settings, max games played is 82. Seems like we all past that figure a long time ago.
So what is the actual max. games which no one told me about, and isn't under settings? Is Decker running this league, too?
Looks like Fung's plan to foil Smiff from finishing ahead of everyone is out of the bag.
Under settings, max games played is 82. Seems like we all past that figure a long time ago.
So what is the actual max. games which no one told me about, and isn't under settings? Is Decker running this league, too?
Looks like Fung's plan to foil Smiff from finishing ahead of everyone is out of the bag.
Christmas came early for Smiff tonight...
YuleSmith is a quenching, hoppy "double" IPA. Appearance: Clear copper color and a creamy beige head with good retention. Flavor: Starts out with a bite of hops, but a perfect balance of maltiness and a dry finish leave you thirsting for that next sip. Aroma: The aroma starts with a heady citrusy and floral feel, and a slight overtone of vanilla. Mouthfeel (body/texture): Smooth, medium-bodied. Warm mouthfeel from the high alcohol content. Feels lush and full in the mouth. Smiff liked it.Born Liar : Lying Liar : A Liar That Lies : Liar : A Lie
"I want to state clearly and without qualification: I did not take steroids, human growth hormone or any other banned substances at any time in my baseball career or, in fact, my entire life," liar Roger "Liar" Clemens, a liar, lied in a statement issued by his lying agent, a liar. "Those substances represent a dangerous and destructive shortcut that no athlete should ever take," he lying lied while lying.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
this is probably nothing to worry about (cont'd)
"If the bee disappeared off the face of the globe, then man would only have four years of life left. No more bees, no more pollination, no more plants, no more animals, no more man."
-- Albert Einstein
-- Albert Einstein
Who knew: there are phones in Zambia?
News Item: Zambia bans radio call-in shows because they have become a "channel of insults and misinformation."
Why haven't we thought of this?
Why haven't we thought of this?
Is it a coincidence?
News Item: Federal government paper-shredding contracts increase 600 percent in last six years.
In a possibly related story, scandals and corruption are also up 600 percent.
In a possibly related story, scandals and corruption are also up 600 percent.
anudder Idiocracy indicator
Merriam-Webster names "w00t," an expression of joy invented by online gamers, as "the word of the year."
Now whitey's stealing darky
Dis is what dey did to Michael Jackson - that boy was too talented to be white. Watch out Tiger...
Disorder turning anchor's skin from black to white
Disorder turning anchor's skin from black to white
are we sure we know what our neighboring galaxies are up to?
News item: Jet From Supermassive Black Hole Seen Blasting Neighboring Galaxy
A jet of highly charged radiation from a supermassive black hole at the center of a distant galaxy is blasting another galaxy nearby -- an act of galactic violence that astronomers said yesterday they have never seen before.
A jet of highly charged radiation from a supermassive black hole at the center of a distant galaxy is blasting another galaxy nearby -- an act of galactic violence that astronomers said yesterday they have never seen before.
finally some good news for da whiners out deres
Cowboys coach Wade Phillips said the teams training staff is optimistic about the status of Tony Romo for Week 16. "They [trainers] think he is going to be all right," said Phillips, who said he was unsure if Romo would need to wear a brace in practice on his injured thumb. The Cowboys play at the Panthers on Saturday.
Don't expect New England to rest Tom Brady against Miami next week until very late in the game.
Bears OC Ron Turner expects Kyle Orton to remain the team's starting QB for the final two weeks. Hopefully fantasy owners have better QB2 options than Orton, who directed a Bears offense that produced little on Monday night and next face a stingy Packers defense.
Don't expect New England to rest Tom Brady against Miami next week until very late in the game.
Bears OC Ron Turner expects Kyle Orton to remain the team's starting QB for the final two weeks. Hopefully fantasy owners have better QB2 options than Orton, who directed a Bears offense that produced little on Monday night and next face a stingy Packers defense.
Cricket Rules - Post 5 (i think) of 473
This one is the closest to the really cool Aussie Rules signal. It means 6 runs have been scored, or, in baseball terms, it might be, it could be, it is, a home run, holy cow.
Punishment, whitey style
Well, I don't know if they're white, but it sounds like whitey punishment, like time-outs and being grounded and being sent to your room where there's a tv and a computer with internet access and a phone and a ladder just outside...
Dad's sale of pot-smoking son's game sparks Web debate
Mon Dec 17, 6:41 PM ET
TORONTO (Reuters) - A Canadian man who said he sold his 15-year-old son's prized video game, a Christmas gift, on eBay after catching him smoking marijuana has sparked an online debate on who is wrong -- father or son.
The unidentified man decided to punish his son by selling the popular and hard-to-find Guitar Hero III videogame he had bought him for Christmas for $90 on the auction site where an Australian buyer bid $9,100. It was not known if the sale at that price actually proceeded.
"I had finally got the Holy Grail of Xmas presents pretty much just in the nick of time. I couldn't wait to spread the jubilance to my son," the father said in a letter accompanying the posting on eBay.
"Then, yesterday, I came home from work early and what do I find? My innocent little boy smoking pot in the backyard with two of his delinquent friends."
The seller, who describes himself as an elementary school teacher but could not be contacted to verify his story, said that by selling the game he intended to teach his son a lesson.
But whether true or not, the five-day auction, that ended on Dec 10, elicited more than a 100 comments.
Some sided with the disgruntled father and others accusing him of "publicly humiliating" his son.
The father has since updated the posting with more responses to the feedback, including accusations that the sale was a hoax.
"All I can do is assure you that yes, the auction is real," he said on the site.
No one from eBay was available to comment.
"I am still considering getting him a game for his Nintendo. Maybe something like Barbie,"
added the father.
(Reporting by Claire Sibonney; Editing by Patricia Reaney)
Dad's sale of pot-smoking son's game sparks Web debate
Mon Dec 17, 6:41 PM ET
TORONTO (Reuters) - A Canadian man who said he sold his 15-year-old son's prized video game, a Christmas gift, on eBay after catching him smoking marijuana has sparked an online debate on who is wrong -- father or son.
The unidentified man decided to punish his son by selling the popular and hard-to-find Guitar Hero III videogame he had bought him for Christmas for $90 on the auction site where an Australian buyer bid $9,100. It was not known if the sale at that price actually proceeded.
"I had finally got the Holy Grail of Xmas presents pretty much just in the nick of time. I couldn't wait to spread the jubilance to my son," the father said in a letter accompanying the posting on eBay.
"Then, yesterday, I came home from work early and what do I find? My innocent little boy smoking pot in the backyard with two of his delinquent friends."
The seller, who describes himself as an elementary school teacher but could not be contacted to verify his story, said that by selling the game he intended to teach his son a lesson.
But whether true or not, the five-day auction, that ended on Dec 10, elicited more than a 100 comments.
Some sided with the disgruntled father and others accusing him of "publicly humiliating" his son.
The father has since updated the posting with more responses to the feedback, including accusations that the sale was a hoax.
"All I can do is assure you that yes, the auction is real," he said on the site.
No one from eBay was available to comment.
"I am still considering getting him a game for his Nintendo. Maybe something like Barbie,"
added the father.
(Reporting by Claire Sibonney; Editing by Patricia Reaney)
Commando Style
In which Fungster considers ritual suicide after his humiliation...
Sarge,
It was all lined up for us. We got the opponents we wanted. Our quarterbacks had the right matchups. 50 points in the bank. Then all we needed was our superior running backs and wide receivers to do their job. Then it would have been the clash of the titans in the final. One more match to decide it all.
At least you made it close. My humiliation was total. My total team output was the worst of the season. Oh sure, it would have beaten Corporal about half the time, but I wasn't playing the Corporal. This was the playoffs. This is when you're supposed to bring it. And my team brought nothing. Absolutely nothing.
But who's to blame? You could look at the fact that my first and second round picks are out for the season with injuries. But the team went on without them, scoring more points than anyone else. Or how about picks 3, 4 and 5, who had 23 points combined, where they should have had 80. They were the leaders of the team, and they led them to a shipwreck. Of titanic proportions.
Smiff says it was an act of God. Well, why has God forsaken us? What did we do wrong? What did Smiff do right? What must Corms do to avoid God's wrath? Maybe I should go to God, talk to him, get the scoop.
Just then, God appeared. "My son, what is troubling you so?"
"Why have you forsaken us? Why did you let the non-believer win?"
"Well, do you remember last night's game?"
"Vaguely"
"In the last two minutes, when Orton let fly?"
"I do remember that."
"What happened?"
"The ball was intercepted by Minnesota"
"And why did that happen?"
"Er, because we suck?"
"No. Because the Minnesota defender went and seized the ball. The Chicago wide receiver waited for the ball and it never arrived."
"And this is relevant how?"
"Smiff won because he went out and seized the victory from your jaws. You just sat on your team and hoped they would win. He knew his team sucked so he went out there and got the players he needed to achieve victory."
"So I should drop all my players and get all new ones?"
"No, you should have players that seize the day, not ones that rest on their laurels."
"Ok, still a little confused, but I think I get it."
"Great! Oh, one more thing."
"Yes?"
"You should probably call 911."
I looked down to see a huge sword through my chest.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!"
Just then, I woke up. Phew. Was it all a dream? Did I just dream about losing to Smiff and my team had really won? I dashed for the laptop, fired up the browser and, crap. Still lost. But now I had a message to relay to Corms from God. I had purpose once more. A reason to live. Till next week anyway...
Always your friend,
Fungster
Sarge,
It was all lined up for us. We got the opponents we wanted. Our quarterbacks had the right matchups. 50 points in the bank. Then all we needed was our superior running backs and wide receivers to do their job. Then it would have been the clash of the titans in the final. One more match to decide it all.
At least you made it close. My humiliation was total. My total team output was the worst of the season. Oh sure, it would have beaten Corporal about half the time, but I wasn't playing the Corporal. This was the playoffs. This is when you're supposed to bring it. And my team brought nothing. Absolutely nothing.
But who's to blame? You could look at the fact that my first and second round picks are out for the season with injuries. But the team went on without them, scoring more points than anyone else. Or how about picks 3, 4 and 5, who had 23 points combined, where they should have had 80. They were the leaders of the team, and they led them to a shipwreck. Of titanic proportions.
Smiff says it was an act of God. Well, why has God forsaken us? What did we do wrong? What did Smiff do right? What must Corms do to avoid God's wrath? Maybe I should go to God, talk to him, get the scoop.
Just then, God appeared. "My son, what is troubling you so?"
"Why have you forsaken us? Why did you let the non-believer win?"
"Well, do you remember last night's game?"
"Vaguely"
"In the last two minutes, when Orton let fly?"
"I do remember that."
"What happened?"
"The ball was intercepted by Minnesota"
"And why did that happen?"
"Er, because we suck?"
"No. Because the Minnesota defender went and seized the ball. The Chicago wide receiver waited for the ball and it never arrived."
"And this is relevant how?"
"Smiff won because he went out and seized the victory from your jaws. You just sat on your team and hoped they would win. He knew his team sucked so he went out there and got the players he needed to achieve victory."
"So I should drop all my players and get all new ones?"
"No, you should have players that seize the day, not ones that rest on their laurels."
"Ok, still a little confused, but I think I get it."
"Great! Oh, one more thing."
"Yes?"
"You should probably call 911."
I looked down to see a huge sword through my chest.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!"
Just then, I woke up. Phew. Was it all a dream? Did I just dream about losing to Smiff and my team had really won? I dashed for the laptop, fired up the browser and, crap. Still lost. But now I had a message to relay to Corms from God. I had purpose once more. A reason to live. Till next week anyway...
Always your friend,
Fungster
Phokking Phantasy Phootball
Phinal
(4) S#i+ Blowing Up
(3) BOO
Da rubbermatch between dese 2, who don't deserve to be in da final. But dey're dere. So suck it, the rest of us. U'd better phokking win Corms. Though it might be amusing to see Smiff wear da Bears T-Shirt, beaming in all his glory...
Bronze Medal Yahoo Trophy Winning Who Gives A Phokking Crap Matchup
(1) Defending Negro
(2) NFL Players Assoc
Buncha Choke Artists. Once again the "It's hard to beat a team 3 times in a season" adage comes back to bite dese 2 in the @$$. In which case Sarge is a shoo in...
The Matchup That Everyone Will Be Watching
(8) TheRobot Cockroaches
(7) Fortress America
Corporal has lost 13 in a row. Ranger has lost 5 in a row and 10 of 11, his only win in that stretch coming against Corporal's Cockroaches. Ranger lost last week in a matchup where both teams failed to break the century mark, the only time that's happened all season. Something has to give. Both teams score over 200 in this one. Somehow.
You know what else is phokking ridiculous? Apparently there's a limit to the number of labels you can put in, well, there's a limit in characters anyway. Dis coulda used soooooooooooooo many more labels...
(4) S#i+ Blowing Up
(3) BOO
Da rubbermatch between dese 2, who don't deserve to be in da final. But dey're dere. So suck it, the rest of us. U'd better phokking win Corms. Though it might be amusing to see Smiff wear da Bears T-Shirt, beaming in all his glory...
Bronze Medal Yahoo Trophy Winning Who Gives A Phokking Crap Matchup
(1) Defending Negro
(2) NFL Players Assoc
Buncha Choke Artists. Once again the "It's hard to beat a team 3 times in a season" adage comes back to bite dese 2 in the @$$. In which case Sarge is a shoo in...
The Matchup That Everyone Will Be Watching
(8) TheRobot Cockroaches
(7) Fortress America
Corporal has lost 13 in a row. Ranger has lost 5 in a row and 10 of 11, his only win in that stretch coming against Corporal's Cockroaches. Ranger lost last week in a matchup where both teams failed to break the century mark, the only time that's happened all season. Something has to give. Both teams score over 200 in this one. Somehow.
You know what else is phokking ridiculous? Apparently there's a limit to the number of labels you can put in, well, there's a limit in characters anyway. Dis coulda used soooooooooooooo many more labels...
Huckster: wid da tarrists?
Romney Slams Huckabee, Defends Bush’s Foreign Policy
"I may not be the expert that some people are on foreign policy, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night."
-- The next Rezzz-i-dunce of the United States, Mike Huckabee
"I may not be the expert that some people are on foreign policy, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night."
-- The next Rezzz-i-dunce of the United States, Mike Huckabee
a proposal that works for everyone
A poll on channel 7 during the Bears game revealed that Bears fans who respond to polls on channel 7 regard Donovan McNabb as the team's most likely starting quarterback in 2008. If true, the Eagles will need a quarterback, and Grossman will need a team... just sayin...
finally, some good news (cont'd)
Here's an idea so good, so benevolent, so forward-thinking, so hope-inspiring, it's bound to rip a black hole in the universe or something...
Illinois chosen for experimental coal plant
(AP) — A government and industry research project to learn ways to burn coal without emitting global warming gases took a major step forward Tuesday as an industry group said it would build the facility at a site in Illinois, choosing the location over two potential sites in Texas.
The futuristic $1.8 beeellion power plant, known as FutureGen, will be built on several hundred acres near Mattoon, Ill., where construction is expected to bring hundreds of jobs and boost the local economy.
Illinois chosen for experimental coal plant
(AP) — A government and industry research project to learn ways to burn coal without emitting global warming gases took a major step forward Tuesday as an industry group said it would build the facility at a site in Illinois, choosing the location over two potential sites in Texas.
The futuristic $1.8 beeellion power plant, known as FutureGen, will be built on several hundred acres near Mattoon, Ill., where construction is expected to bring hundreds of jobs and boost the local economy.
k-mad clambering back on the Obama bandwagon
Nuttin' against da Elf exactly... just worried about the bacterium.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Well, that settles it...
From Yahoo! - in assessing the game:
Top Performers
Chicago
J. McKie RB
1 Rush, 1 yd
1 TD
Minnesota
A. Peterson RB
20 Rush, 78 yds
2 TDs
Top Performers
Chicago
J. McKie RB
1 Rush, 1 yd
1 TD
Minnesota
A. Peterson RB
20 Rush, 78 yds
2 TDs
how will they blow it?
Chicago 13
Minnesota 6
Halftime
I don't care -- I'm going to bed. I'll say dis dough... for all the talk of Grossman, the oh-fensive line is even more totally gross, man.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Decker's vote for president on 12/17/07
John Edwards - from Krugman's column today in the New York Times:
The argument began during the Democratic debate, when the moderator — Carolyn Washburn, the editor of The Des Moines Register — suggested that Mr. Edwards shouldn’t be so harsh on the wealthy and special interests, because “the same groups are often responsible for getting things done in Washington.”
Mr. Edwards replied, “Some people argue that we’re going to sit at a table with these people and they’re going to voluntarily give their power away. I think it is a complete fantasy; it will never happen.”
See here for changes to my vote - but man - I'm all about this argument. Hate them. Hate them like I hate Romo right now.
The argument began during the Democratic debate, when the moderator — Carolyn Washburn, the editor of The Des Moines Register — suggested that Mr. Edwards shouldn’t be so harsh on the wealthy and special interests, because “the same groups are often responsible for getting things done in Washington.”
Mr. Edwards replied, “Some people argue that we’re going to sit at a table with these people and they’re going to voluntarily give their power away. I think it is a complete fantasy; it will never happen.”
See here for changes to my vote - but man - I'm all about this argument. Hate them. Hate them like I hate Romo right now.
An Act of God? It's da only way for S#i+ Blowing Up to win...
Like Mike Hackabee, Smiff has been talking to The Big Man...hoping for a plague of locusts to rain down upon Foxborough.
Alas, i will be on a train to Santa Barbara and can't watch the end times play out on the grid-iron...
ESPN reporter Wendi Nix reported that there is currently a "wintry mix" falling at Foxborough stadium and similar conditions should continue until gametime. Winds remain the main concern and are expected to continue. It started snowing in New England, but quickly changed to sleet and freezing rain. More than anything, wind would hurt Brady's chances of a big day. We would continue to monitor all the weather situations, but would only consider benching Brady for another top-5 quarterback option. The consequences of the weather is unknown.
Dis just in...
Wendi Nix of ESPN reports that the weather at Gillette Stadium in Foxborough "is an absolute mess." The tarp is still on the field less than two hours before kickoff between the Jets and Patriots. Snow and what The Weather Channel reports could be 35 MPH winds will lessen the Patriots' chances of putting up their usually explosive numbers offensively, and could specifically put a big hit on Tom Brady's fantasy value.
...Locusts! I Demand Thee!!
(I'm also seeing if God will smite Mike Shanahan and his "offensive" play calling...)
Alas, i will be on a train to Santa Barbara and can't watch the end times play out on the grid-iron...
ESPN reporter Wendi Nix reported that there is currently a "wintry mix" falling at Foxborough stadium and similar conditions should continue until gametime. Winds remain the main concern and are expected to continue. It started snowing in New England, but quickly changed to sleet and freezing rain. More than anything, wind would hurt Brady's chances of a big day. We would continue to monitor all the weather situations, but would only consider benching Brady for another top-5 quarterback option. The consequences of the weather is unknown.
Dis just in...
Wendi Nix of ESPN reports that the weather at Gillette Stadium in Foxborough "is an absolute mess." The tarp is still on the field less than two hours before kickoff between the Jets and Patriots. Snow and what The Weather Channel reports could be 35 MPH winds will lessen the Patriots' chances of putting up their usually explosive numbers offensively, and could specifically put a big hit on Tom Brady's fantasy value.
...Locusts! I Demand Thee!!
(I'm also seeing if God will smite Mike Shanahan and his "offensive" play calling...)
Bad Idea
So the Corporal decides he wants to go out and walk on the beach after the 20 feet of snow we've had over the past month. At least he was smart enuff not to lead. All of a sudden, what looked like solid ground turned out to be......a sinkhole of slushy ice! Now Fungster's all wet. Or at least, his right foot was. Not to be outdone, Corporal went over the ridge separating the beach sand from the white mounds of who knows what. Slosh! Corporal went in deeper than the Fungster did. Now both are drying off and warming up. So be warned - don't go walking out on the beach after 20 feet of snow.
Now back to preparing to watch my team blitz Smiff's...
Now back to preparing to watch my team blitz Smiff's...
The Des Moines Register is Dumb
Endorsing Clinton for her experience? Sounds like a Dusty Baker type decision.
While a glowing turd would be preferable to anybody on the Republican side, she does not improve on the turd nearly so much as one would hope.
Having weighed in on the weigh-in I now go to sleep.
A big Go Fuck Yourself Des Moines Register though!
While a glowing turd would be preferable to anybody on the Republican side, she does not improve on the turd nearly so much as one would hope.
Having weighed in on the weigh-in I now go to sleep.
A big Go Fuck Yourself Des Moines Register though!
Saturday, December 15, 2007
oh, really
From the local "news" tonight:
"The computer models are in disagreement over how much rain we will get on Wednesday."
So what the phokk good are they?
Smiff's prediction: seeing as it's Friday, your "forecast" is totally worthless and the computer "models" should be printed out and used for terlet paper. And thanks for wasting everyone's time.
"The computer models are in disagreement over how much rain we will get on Wednesday."
So what the phokk good are they?
Smiff's prediction: seeing as it's Friday, your "forecast" is totally worthless and the computer "models" should be printed out and used for terlet paper. And thanks for wasting everyone's time.
Fungai shut out again
Top Baby Names for 2007 - sounds very whitey...
Girls
1. Sophia
2. Isabella
3. Emma
4. Madison (slut)
5. Ava
Boys
1. Aiden (3rd year in a row - now dat's retarded)
2. Ethan
3. Jacob
4. Jayden (i will never like anyone named Jayden)
5. Caden (huh?)
What's with the -en ending names? This is a trend signaling the further, gradual idiocracy of America.
Girls
1. Sophia
2. Isabella
3. Emma
4. Madison (slut)
5. Ava
Boys
1. Aiden (3rd year in a row - now dat's retarded)
2. Ethan
3. Jacob
4. Jayden (i will never like anyone named Jayden)
5. Caden (huh?)
What's with the -en ending names? This is a trend signaling the further, gradual idiocracy of America.
Friday, December 14, 2007
Finally, some good news
Does this mean we can start using the money to pay for reconstruction? And for keeping our boys there? And Blackwater's? And Halliburton's?
Iraqi oil exceeds pre-war output
Iraqi oil exceeds pre-war output
Better (decades) late than never
Christmas card arrives 93 years late
OBERLIN, Kansas (AP) -- A postcard featuring a color drawing of Santa Claus and a young girl was mailed in 1914, but its journey was slower than Christmas. It just arrived in northwest Kansas.
The Christmas card was dated December 23, 1914, and mailed to Ethel Martin of Oberlin, apparently from her cousins in Alma, Nebraska.
It's a mystery where it spent most of the last century, Oberlin Postmaster Steve Schultz said.
"It's surprising that it never got thrown away," he said. "How someone found it, I don't know."
Ethel Martin is deceased, but Schultz said the post office wanted to get the card to a relative.
That's how the 93-year-old relic ended up with Bernice Martin, Ethel's sister-in-law. She said she believed the card had been found somewhere in Illinois.
"That's all we know," she said. "But it is kind of curious. We'd like to know how it got down there."
The card was placed inside another envelope with modern postage for the trip to Oberlin -- the one-cent postage of the early 20th century wouldn't have covered it, Martin said.
"We don't know much about it," she said. "But wherever they kept it, it was in perfect shape."
OBERLIN, Kansas (AP) -- A postcard featuring a color drawing of Santa Claus and a young girl was mailed in 1914, but its journey was slower than Christmas. It just arrived in northwest Kansas.
The Christmas card was dated December 23, 1914, and mailed to Ethel Martin of Oberlin, apparently from her cousins in Alma, Nebraska.
It's a mystery where it spent most of the last century, Oberlin Postmaster Steve Schultz said.
"It's surprising that it never got thrown away," he said. "How someone found it, I don't know."
Ethel Martin is deceased, but Schultz said the post office wanted to get the card to a relative.
That's how the 93-year-old relic ended up with Bernice Martin, Ethel's sister-in-law. She said she believed the card had been found somewhere in Illinois.
"That's all we know," she said. "But it is kind of curious. We'd like to know how it got down there."
The card was placed inside another envelope with modern postage for the trip to Oberlin -- the one-cent postage of the early 20th century wouldn't have covered it, Martin said.
"We don't know much about it," she said. "But wherever they kept it, it was in perfect shape."
I would like to have a beer with Fred Thompson
From the Washington Post, 12/12/07:
His 87-year-old mother's advice persuaded him to reject the new intelligence report that Iran has suspended its nuclear program. "Remember whatcha mama told ya," he says. If somethin' appears to be too good to be true, it probably is." Is it possible to be too folksy? Thompson seems determined to find out.
His 87-year-old mother's advice persuaded him to reject the new intelligence report that Iran has suspended its nuclear program. "Remember whatcha mama told ya," he says. If somethin' appears to be too good to be true, it probably is." Is it possible to be too folksy? Thompson seems determined to find out.
Smiff and Gooch Stayin' Classy
Tadahito Iguchi's agent said Thursday that his client turned down several multi-year contract offers to sign with the Padres for one year and $4 million. Iguchi is said to have had a two-year offer to play second base for the Rockies and a three-year offer to play third base for the Phillies. Instead, he takes a one-year deal to play in the majors' most extreme pitcher's ballpark. Like Ron Burgundy, he must think that San Diego is a very classy place.
Thank You Rod, Richie, and Todd
'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there
But St. Nick himself, plump and brimming with joy
Hit a snag on his last stop: Chicago, Illinois
For Rudolph the reindeer, whose nose led the way
Suddenly fell ill and could not guide the sleigh
Santa said "Well, just one option remains
I'll finish my route using CTA trains"
He gathered the reindeer and sack full of toys
To give to Chicagoland good girls and boys
And though well-equipped, CTA card in hand
He'd soon find their trip wouldn't go quite as planned
The train that they rode went from four tracks to one
And wouldn't move fast 'til construction was done
Right then, Santa's joy changed to derision
Saying "It'll take 3 damn hours to reach Clark and Division"
"We normally fly through the air with such speed
But this subway, it moves like a turtle on weed"
The seats were all dirty and beyond repairs
The reindeer stood in urine, which for once wasn't theirs
And Sally's new doll, it would just have to wait
Her Brown Line stop's closed until 2008!
Yes…Santa, he trudged and he slogged and he groaned
It seemed that his Doomsday would not be postponed
But he made a vow on that cold Christmas night
"I must do my job, and do the job right!"
He rode on that Red Line, and then on the Blue
Plus the 36 bus and the Clark 22
He rode on the Orange Line, rode on the Green
From O'Hare to East Side and all homes between
And despite the delays at a few of those places
He did all he could to put smiles on kids' faces
And when he was done, he sighed with relief
Though the trip had been rough, it was worth all the grief
He delivered those presents, he was true to his word
He looked at his watch…..it was January 3rd.
They all flew back home once Rudolph felt better
Mrs. Claus fetched his hubby hot tea and a sweater
Then St. Nick sat down in his favorite chair
And thought all about the entire affair
He hoped that the CTA would succeed
In getting their present: the funds that they need
And I heard him exclaim, as exclaiming's his habit
"Merry Christmas to All! Next time, f**k it, I'll cab it!!!!"
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Will, you dick...
Well, I've been catching up on the Mitchell Report - reading Will Carroll's chat wrap at Baseball Prospectus and there he goes, getting all wrapped up in his "Cult of Will" again - why put this question in the queue Will, if this is what you're going to say? Why not just move on to the next question?
I swear, this guy would just love to be running down the court room steps, tailored suit, briefcase, serious look...:
DrManhattan (NYC, NY): Will, did Mitchell's people ask to interview you in connection with the investigation?
Will Carroll: LOTS of questions on this. My answer, as it always has been, is that I have no comment.
Oh, fuck off Will.
LOTS of questions my ass. But enough of them are shining the toady knob, so he finally gives an "aw shucks guys" moment and puts it on the board:
MarkDuell (Columbus): During a quick glance at the report, I noticed you and your book were cited. I hope that means the whole report is as well researched as your book.
Will Carroll: Well, I guess that "no comment" won't stand now, eh?
No, I guess not, asshole. Maybe you can tell us what the set is like on ESPN again, or some Indianapolis FOX affiliate.
I swear, this guy would just love to be running down the court room steps, tailored suit, briefcase, serious look...:
DrManhattan (NYC, NY): Will, did Mitchell's people ask to interview you in connection with the investigation?
Will Carroll: LOTS of questions on this. My answer, as it always has been, is that I have no comment.
Oh, fuck off Will.
LOTS of questions my ass. But enough of them are shining the toady knob, so he finally gives an "aw shucks guys" moment and puts it on the board:
MarkDuell (Columbus): During a quick glance at the report, I noticed you and your book were cited. I hope that means the whole report is as well researched as your book.
Will Carroll: Well, I guess that "no comment" won't stand now, eh?
No, I guess not, asshole. Maybe you can tell us what the set is like on ESPN again, or some Indianapolis FOX affiliate.
The End Times (previously)
True story: The day it snowed in San Diego.
December 13, 1967, is a day you can't forget – unless you weren't here. Then, it's a day you can't quite accept.
The dream came true 40 years ago this morning, when gale-force winds blew a Canadian cold front far, far off course. Across San Diego County, residents woke up to see the air shimmering with something cold, white and unfamiliar....
The low at Lindbergh Field was 38 degrees at 9:30 a.m. Snow pellets fell from 7:50 to 8:50 a.m.
December 13, 1967, is a day you can't forget – unless you weren't here. Then, it's a day you can't quite accept.
The dream came true 40 years ago this morning, when gale-force winds blew a Canadian cold front far, far off course. Across San Diego County, residents woke up to see the air shimmering with something cold, white and unfamiliar....
The low at Lindbergh Field was 38 degrees at 9:30 a.m. Snow pellets fell from 7:50 to 8:50 a.m.
more SHOCKING revelations!
Kevin Brown, Todd Hundley and John Rocker were named in the Mitchell Report.
Decker's doppelgänger BUSTED!
Former Mets clubhouse employee Kirk Radomski said that he sent multiple shipments of steroids to Eric Gagne between 1999 and 2004, including one package that was sent to Dodger Stadium. Radomski alleges that Paul Lo Duca purchased steroids on Gagne's behalf and recalls having direct contact with him just once, at which time they reportedly spoke about how to get the air out of a syringe. According to the Mitchell Report, the Red Sox had internal discussions about Gagne's past steroid usage before acquiring him in 2007, including an e-mail from general manager Theo Epstein that read: "Have you done any digging on Gagne? I know the Dodgers think he was a steroid guy."
It's about time the truth about this slimeball came out
Now all the "Old-school" whitey lovers can cut the crap about The Rocket doing it the right way.
CHEATER!!!!!!!
CHEATER!!!!!!!
He gone
Mark Prior and the Cubs are parting ways. How do you feel?
Sad -- I think he's ready to turn it around (2042 responses)
46.9%
Happy -- Sick of waiting for this guy (1880 responses)
43.2%
Angry -- I spent $120 on that No. 22 jersey (433 responses)
9.9%
4355 total responses (Results not scientific, but idiotic)
Sad -- I think he's ready to turn it around (2042 responses)
46.9%
Happy -- Sick of waiting for this guy (1880 responses)
43.2%
Angry -- I spent $120 on that No. 22 jersey (433 responses)
9.9%
4355 total responses (Results not scientific, but idiotic)
our bountiful carbon assprint (cont'd)
Scientist: 'Arctic is screaming'
WASHINGTON (AP) -- An already relentless melting of the Arctic greatly accelerated this summer, a warning sign that some scientists worry could mean global warming has passed an ominous tipping point. One even speculated that summer sea ice would be gone in five years.
WASHINGTON (AP) -- An already relentless melting of the Arctic greatly accelerated this summer, a warning sign that some scientists worry could mean global warming has passed an ominous tipping point. One even speculated that summer sea ice would be gone in five years.
Hey Blackwater, Go Phokk Yourselves
Planning group ousted over Blackwater
EAST COUNTY – Five members of the Potrero, CA planning group were voted off the panel Tuesday night in a recall election that served as a symbolic referendum on a controversial training camp proposed by Blackwater Worldwide. The five incumbents all supported the proposed facility.
EAST COUNTY – Five members of the Potrero, CA planning group were voted off the panel Tuesday night in a recall election that served as a symbolic referendum on a controversial training camp proposed by Blackwater Worldwide. The five incumbents all supported the proposed facility.
What does this even mean?
And who is the target audience? Like who is the target audience? Like 74 people in some part of Wisconsin that doesn't even have a name? Or is our Collective Chicago Love Of Sausage what they're counting on?
Goddamn, sausage and beer DO go well together. Ditka would like this. He would nod and say, "Yeah, sausage."
Goddamn, sausage and beer DO go well together. Ditka would like this. He would nod and say, "Yeah, sausage."
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Oh, Whitey
Someone (whitey) thought this was funny. I laughed at the concept, then started reading the fine print. Anyone who's heard the President knows he's very eloquent in whitey's language. He'd never make so many grammatical and spelling mistakes. Still, about 8,000 of these and the budget I linked to earlier is paid off. But this is what happens to your country when whitey doesn't like you. So take note (pun not intended)- let whitey own your land and keep supplying other whiteys with cheap agricultural and mineral goods. Or else...
Self-hatin'
From Slate...
A genetic analysis suggests James Watson is 16 percent African. Watson's genome is publicly available here; a company analyzed it and concluded his genes are "what you would expect in someone who had a great-grandparent who was African." Watson previously said he was "inherently gloomy about the prospects for Africa" because "all our social policies are based on the fact that their intelligence is the same as ours—whereas all the testing says not really." Critics' reactions to the DNA test: 1) Oops—looks like "their" genes are "ours"! 2) Why the gloom? A part-African kid can even grow up to become James Watson. 3) This shows Watson has "black genes." 4) This shows race isn't genetic; it's a social construction. Cautions: 1) Current genome analyses are often inaccurate. 2) The real impact of this one will be to scare people about genetic privacy. Fine print: "9% of Watson's genes are likely to have come from an ancestor of Asian descent." (Related: Human Nature's summaries of the Watson uproar.)
Wonder how many more "darky haters" out there turn out to have "darky genes." I say we all get tested, so we can send the pure whiteys back to Europe, pure darkies back to Africa, Asia etc and keep all the mixed up people over here. And only the pure Native Americans get to have casinos. Here's to hoping there's some Portuguese ancestor in my family tree...
A genetic analysis suggests James Watson is 16 percent African. Watson's genome is publicly available here; a company analyzed it and concluded his genes are "what you would expect in someone who had a great-grandparent who was African." Watson previously said he was "inherently gloomy about the prospects for Africa" because "all our social policies are based on the fact that their intelligence is the same as ours—whereas all the testing says not really." Critics' reactions to the DNA test: 1) Oops—looks like "their" genes are "ours"! 2) Why the gloom? A part-African kid can even grow up to become James Watson. 3) This shows Watson has "black genes." 4) This shows race isn't genetic; it's a social construction. Cautions: 1) Current genome analyses are often inaccurate. 2) The real impact of this one will be to scare people about genetic privacy. Fine print: "9% of Watson's genes are likely to have come from an ancestor of Asian descent." (Related: Human Nature's summaries of the Watson uproar.)
Wonder how many more "darky haters" out there turn out to have "darky genes." I say we all get tested, so we can send the pure whiteys back to Europe, pure darkies back to Africa, Asia etc and keep all the mixed up people over here. And only the pure Native Americans get to have casinos. Here's to hoping there's some Portuguese ancestor in my family tree...
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
[insert own joke here]
Kosuke Fukudome and the Cubs have reportedly agreed to a four-year, $50 million contract.
Hideki Matsui's numbers were better than this in Japan, and he's been--what?--a league average corner OF...
Hideki Matsui's numbers were better than this in Japan, and he's been--what?--a league average corner OF...
Here's a HYOOGE steaming pile...
MLB on Mitchell Report: "Nothing is more important to Commissioner Selig than the integrity of the game..."
Bears still in it!
In fact, everyone's still in it, though I guess this was before this weekend's games...
Bears not mathematically done yet
By Vaughn McClure Tribune staff reporter
4:38 PM CST, December 8, 2007
As crazy as it sounds, the Bears remain in the playoff conversation.
Go ahead. Shake your head in denial.
But an NFL spokesperson confirmed the Bears have not been mathematically eliminated. In fact, no team in the NFC had been eliminated as of Tuesday, including three, 3-9 teams.
Of course, that's likely to change with Sunday's games. And the Bears have to win their final three games. The odds are against them.
According to the Elias Sports Bureau (buncha liars, damned liars, statisticians), no 5-8 team has made the playoffs under the new format, dating back to 1990. Seven teams that finished 8-8 though have made the playoffs, most recently last season's New York Giants.
Mark Myers of chancebot.com—a site that analyzes such numbers—and probably wrote this article-figures the Bears will have a 1.27 percent shot at a wild-card berth if Dallas, Seattle and San Francisco win this coming weekend. Then, if the Bears win out, their chances would increase to 16.25 percent.
The tiniest bit of opportunity has at least one Bear optimistic.
"We win these last three, and everybody else keeps losing, we do have a shot," cornerback Charles (peanuts for brains) Tillman said.
My embellishments in italics.
Bears not mathematically done yet
By Vaughn McClure Tribune staff reporter
4:38 PM CST, December 8, 2007
As crazy as it sounds, the Bears remain in the playoff conversation.
Go ahead. Shake your head in denial.
But an NFL spokesperson confirmed the Bears have not been mathematically eliminated. In fact, no team in the NFC had been eliminated as of Tuesday, including three, 3-9 teams.
Of course, that's likely to change with Sunday's games. And the Bears have to win their final three games. The odds are against them.
According to the Elias Sports Bureau (buncha liars, damned liars, statisticians), no 5-8 team has made the playoffs under the new format, dating back to 1990. Seven teams that finished 8-8 though have made the playoffs, most recently last season's New York Giants.
Mark Myers of chancebot.com—a site that analyzes such numbers—and probably wrote this article-figures the Bears will have a 1.27 percent shot at a wild-card berth if Dallas, Seattle and San Francisco win this coming weekend. Then, if the Bears win out, their chances would increase to 16.25 percent.
The tiniest bit of opportunity has at least one Bear optimistic.
"We win these last three, and everybody else keeps losing, we do have a shot," cornerback Charles (peanuts for brains) Tillman said.
My embellishments in italics.
The Huckster vs. Rudy 9/11
Last week, Rudy's revelations placed him ahead of Huckabee as the Slimiest Republican Candidate (non-Tancredo division). But The Huckster seems to have pulled ahead this week, what with the many ridiculous things he's said in the past which no one cared about before he took the lead in Iowa polling:
Mike Huckabee in a speech to pastors in 1998:
"I hope we answer the alarm clock and take this nation back for Christ."
Does the Southern Baptist convention state that Jesus was an American? Can someone check dat? And how does one exactly answer a clock? However, we do know this:
In August of 1998, Huckabee was one of 131 signatories to a full page USA Today Ad which declared: “I affirm the statement on the family issued by the 1998 Southern Baptist Convention.” What was in the family statement from the SBC? “A wife is to submit herself graciously to the servant leadership of her husband even as the church willingly submits to the headship of Christ.” Read on…
(Mike Huckabee: Women Should Submit To Their Husbands)
Then there are his 1992 statements regarding AIDS:
"If the federal government is truly serious about doing something with the AIDS virus, we need to take steps that would isolate the carriers of this plague."
"It is difficult to understand the public policy towards AIDS. It is the first time in the history of civilization in which the carriers of a genuine plague have not been isolated from the general population, and in which this deadly disease for which there is no cure is being treated as a civil rights issue instead of the true health crisis it represents."
Of course, the CDC determined in 1985 that AIDS could not be spread by casual contact.
On the other side, 9/11 said on Meet the Press on Sunday that a President's mistress should get Secret Service protection (i think he's speaking from experience here). He also said, "Nine eleven."
We're probably going to see how this plays out until the Iowa Caucus before declaring a winner...
Mike Huckabee in a speech to pastors in 1998:
"I hope we answer the alarm clock and take this nation back for Christ."
Does the Southern Baptist convention state that Jesus was an American? Can someone check dat? And how does one exactly answer a clock? However, we do know this:
In August of 1998, Huckabee was one of 131 signatories to a full page USA Today Ad which declared: “I affirm the statement on the family issued by the 1998 Southern Baptist Convention.” What was in the family statement from the SBC? “A wife is to submit herself graciously to the servant leadership of her husband even as the church willingly submits to the headship of Christ.” Read on…
(Mike Huckabee: Women Should Submit To Their Husbands)
Then there are his 1992 statements regarding AIDS:
"If the federal government is truly serious about doing something with the AIDS virus, we need to take steps that would isolate the carriers of this plague."
"It is difficult to understand the public policy towards AIDS. It is the first time in the history of civilization in which the carriers of a genuine plague have not been isolated from the general population, and in which this deadly disease for which there is no cure is being treated as a civil rights issue instead of the true health crisis it represents."
Of course, the CDC determined in 1985 that AIDS could not be spread by casual contact.
On the other side, 9/11 said on Meet the Press on Sunday that a President's mistress should get Secret Service protection (i think he's speaking from experience here). He also said, "Nine eleven."
We're probably going to see how this plays out until the Iowa Caucus before declaring a winner...
LoC Members all over American Utopia
Semifinal
(1) Defending Negro
(4) S#i+ Blowing Up
Smiff out for revenge after last years final when all his players went on vacation because their teams were in the playoffs and wah wa wah wah wah. Fung trying to beat Smiff for the 3rd time this year and 4th in a row to make his 2nd straight final. So, we will have a repeat finalist...
Semifinal
(2) NFL Players Assoc.
(3) Bring on Orton
Sarge misses out on 1st seed by .25 of a point on Colston's last and irrelevant reception. He gets rewarded by taking on Corms, who he is 2-0 against this year, instead of Smiff, who he's 1-1 against. These teams battled it out for 7th place last year, with Corms coming out on top. So, two Cinderella stories, one gets to the ball, the other stays in the pumpkin...
Not featured: K-Mad (too sexy for Fantasy Football), Ranger (tanked), Corporal (s#i++ies+ team ever).
(1) Defending Negro
(4) S#i+ Blowing Up
Smiff out for revenge after last years final when all his players went on vacation because their teams were in the playoffs and wah wa wah wah wah. Fung trying to beat Smiff for the 3rd time this year and 4th in a row to make his 2nd straight final. So, we will have a repeat finalist...
Semifinal
(2) NFL Players Assoc.
(3) Bring on Orton
Sarge misses out on 1st seed by .25 of a point on Colston's last and irrelevant reception. He gets rewarded by taking on Corms, who he is 2-0 against this year, instead of Smiff, who he's 1-1 against. These teams battled it out for 7th place last year, with Corms coming out on top. So, two Cinderella stories, one gets to the ball, the other stays in the pumpkin...
Not featured: K-Mad (too sexy for Fantasy Football), Ranger (tanked), Corporal (s#i++ies+ team ever).
Monday, December 10, 2007
just another Bush incompetent
White House Press Secretary Dana Perino: "I know nothing about the Cuban Missile Crisis."
Oh, it's on now...
EU increases pressure on Zimbabwe
President raps ‘gang of four’
Merkel’s remarks demonstrate fascist inclinations: Ndlovu
In summary:
EU - we want to help, but you must do this, and that, and the other
Africa - we aren't your colonies any more, don't tell us what to do. Send the money though
Result - nothing.
President raps ‘gang of four’
Merkel’s remarks demonstrate fascist inclinations: Ndlovu
In summary:
EU - we want to help, but you must do this, and that, and the other
Africa - we aren't your colonies any more, don't tell us what to do. Send the money though
Result - nothing.
Sunday, December 9, 2007
what's been spinnin' in Smiff's iPod?
Adrian Belew: Lone Rhino
The Album Leaf: Seal Beach
Ambulance Ltd: LP
Battles: Mirrored
Ennio Morricone: Crime and Dissonance
Fairport Convention: Cropredy Festival '07
Henry Cow: Leg End
Jethro Tull: Heavy Horses
King Crimson: Beat
LCD Soundsystem: Sound of Silver
Madvillain: Madvillainy
Midlake: The Trials of Van Occupanther
Miles Davis: A Tribute to Jack Johnson
Muse: Black Holes & Revelations
The Police: Ghost in the Machine
Popul Vuh: Aguirre
Richard Thompson: Sweet Warrior
Robert Fripp: At the End of Time
Robert Fripp & Brian Eno: Beyond Even
Robert Wyatt: Comicopera
Roy Harper: Stormcock
Rush: Moving Pictures
Scott Walker: The Drift
Steve Earle: Just an American Boy
Sufjan Stevens: Songs for Christmas
Talk Talk: Laughing Stock
Tim Fite: Over the Counter Culture
Tori Amos: American Doll Posse
The Tubes: The Tubes
Van der Graaf Generator: Godbluff
Wire: Chairs Missing
ZZ Top: Tres Hombres
The Album Leaf: Seal Beach
Ambulance Ltd: LP
Battles: Mirrored
Ennio Morricone: Crime and Dissonance
Fairport Convention: Cropredy Festival '07
Henry Cow: Leg End
Jethro Tull: Heavy Horses
King Crimson: Beat
LCD Soundsystem: Sound of Silver
Madvillain: Madvillainy
Midlake: The Trials of Van Occupanther
Miles Davis: A Tribute to Jack Johnson
Muse: Black Holes & Revelations
The Police: Ghost in the Machine
Popul Vuh: Aguirre
Richard Thompson: Sweet Warrior
Robert Fripp: At the End of Time
Robert Fripp & Brian Eno: Beyond Even
Robert Wyatt: Comicopera
Roy Harper: Stormcock
Rush: Moving Pictures
Scott Walker: The Drift
Steve Earle: Just an American Boy
Sufjan Stevens: Songs for Christmas
Talk Talk: Laughing Stock
Tim Fite: Over the Counter Culture
Tori Amos: American Doll Posse
The Tubes: The Tubes
Van der Graaf Generator: Godbluff
Wire: Chairs Missing
ZZ Top: Tres Hombres
Friday, December 7, 2007
Dikka : FULL@$#IT : SCAM : SHOCKING
Payouts to ex-players small from Ditka's charity
December 7, 2007 / FROM SUN-TIMES WIRES
USA Today is reporting that a charity formed by former Bears coach Mike Ditka to help needy retired players has collected $1.3 million and netted about $315,000 after expenses. But the Mike Ditka Hall of Fame Assistance Trust Fund has given only $57,000 to former players in need, according to federal and Illinois tax records. The trust paid more in fees to induce former stars to appear at a 2005 fundraiser than it gave needy ex-players in its first three years.
Click here to read the full report »
December 7, 2007 / FROM SUN-TIMES WIRES
USA Today is reporting that a charity formed by former Bears coach Mike Ditka to help needy retired players has collected $1.3 million and netted about $315,000 after expenses. But the Mike Ditka Hall of Fame Assistance Trust Fund has given only $57,000 to former players in need, according to federal and Illinois tax records. The trust paid more in fees to induce former stars to appear at a 2005 fundraiser than it gave needy ex-players in its first three years.
Click here to read the full report »
There's that phrase again
Bush 'cannot recall' CIA videos
"I cannot recall" should be punishable by a $1.5 meeeeelion fine AND a couple of years at the death row facility in Terre Haute, IN.
"I cannot recall" should be punishable by a $1.5 meeeeelion fine AND a couple of years at the death row facility in Terre Haute, IN.
Global Warming My @$$
Oh, sorry, it's "Climate Change" now, that way it 'xplains both da heatin' and da coolin'. How convenient...
Thursday's record-tying 0(degrees) at O'Hare the earliest in 3 decades
Tom Skilling
December 7, 2007
Not since 1976--a period of more than three decades--has Chicago's official temperature dropped to 0(degrees) so early in a cold season. For five minutes beginning at 4:04 a.m. Thursday morning, Chicago's official temperature bottomed out at 0(degrees)--a reading which tied the 1972 record for December 6. The frigid benchmark isn't typically reached here for another three weeks and didn't occur for another two months a year ago. The first 0(degrees) waited until a -6(degrees) low was recorded Feb. 3 earlier this year. The combination of clear skies, dry air, a fresh snow cover and light winds was behind the sub-zero readings which occurred at a number of west and NW suburban locations early Thursday.
The week's third snow, part of a system which left up to 4.5" on the ground in Iowa, arrived in a weakening state Thursday evening. The 3-5 hour snowfall was predicted to deposit 1-2" in the Chicago and end well before sun-up Friday.
----------
Tom Skilling is chief meteorologist at WGN-TV. His forecasts can be seen Monday through Friday on WGN-TV News at noon and 9 p.m.
Thursday's record-tying 0(degrees) at O'Hare the earliest in 3 decades
Tom Skilling
December 7, 2007
Not since 1976--a period of more than three decades--has Chicago's official temperature dropped to 0(degrees) so early in a cold season. For five minutes beginning at 4:04 a.m. Thursday morning, Chicago's official temperature bottomed out at 0(degrees)--a reading which tied the 1972 record for December 6. The frigid benchmark isn't typically reached here for another three weeks and didn't occur for another two months a year ago. The first 0(degrees) waited until a -6(degrees) low was recorded Feb. 3 earlier this year. The combination of clear skies, dry air, a fresh snow cover and light winds was behind the sub-zero readings which occurred at a number of west and NW suburban locations early Thursday.
The week's third snow, part of a system which left up to 4.5" on the ground in Iowa, arrived in a weakening state Thursday evening. The 3-5 hour snowfall was predicted to deposit 1-2" in the Chicago and end well before sun-up Friday.
----------
Tom Skilling is chief meteorologist at WGN-TV. His forecasts can be seen Monday through Friday on WGN-TV News at noon and 9 p.m.
I am SHOCKED!
Wrong again...
At 9 this morning, Lindbergh Field only had 0.18 of an inch. That's far below the early estimates. Initially, the weather service thought the coast would get a total of an inch from the storm. It might come close if Lindbergh ends up under a few intense showers the next couple of days, but that's not too likely*, Miller said. It's hard to determine what happened to the rain at this point, he said. The totals in Orange County are no more impressive. He thinks that perhaps the computer forecast models over-estimated the amount of moisture available. Perhaps the models envisioned more of a tap into that moisture plume that stretched all the way back to Hawaii.
*Of course, this means we will get a few intense showers the next couple of days.
At 9 this morning, Lindbergh Field only had 0.18 of an inch. That's far below the early estimates. Initially, the weather service thought the coast would get a total of an inch from the storm. It might come close if Lindbergh ends up under a few intense showers the next couple of days, but that's not too likely*, Miller said. It's hard to determine what happened to the rain at this point, he said. The totals in Orange County are no more impressive. He thinks that perhaps the computer forecast models over-estimated the amount of moisture available. Perhaps the models envisioned more of a tap into that moisture plume that stretched all the way back to Hawaii.
*Of course, this means we will get a few intense showers the next couple of days.
More British Penile Issues
'Fake penis' sex attacker jailed
A sex attacker who hid a carrot in his trousers and pretended it was his erect penis has been jailed for 18 months.
Driving instructor Stephen Cooney, 51, groped three female learner drivers in a series of attacks on Teesside dating back to 2002.
A jury at Teesside Crown Court found him guilty of two indecent assaults and two sexual assaults.
Cooney, of Marske-by-the-Sea near Redcar, told the court the carrot incident was a "practical joke".
The court heard how Cooney put the 12-inch carrot down his trousers and told a pupil in her 40s that a perfectly executed manoeuvre was so good that it had given him an erection.
He then took her hand and made her touch the vegetable before showing her the carrot, the court heard.
He denied placing her hand on his groin, but admitted hiding the vegetable in his pocket.
Naked photos
He told the jury: "I admit it was unprofessional, stupid, and I regret doing it.
"I just thought maybe I would play a practical joke, but obviously it was stupid."
Jailing him, Judge George Moorhouse, said: "You were in a position of trust."
Giving evidence, another of Cooney's pupils said when she failed her test he offered to waive the £80 she owed him if she pulled over into a lay-by and had sex with him.
She told the court: "I just said 'No thank you, Steve'."
He regularly groped her during lessons between August 2005 and February last year, the court heard.
When police arrested him they also found naked photos in the glove box of his Vauxhall Corsa.
A sex attacker who hid a carrot in his trousers and pretended it was his erect penis has been jailed for 18 months.
Driving instructor Stephen Cooney, 51, groped three female learner drivers in a series of attacks on Teesside dating back to 2002.
A jury at Teesside Crown Court found him guilty of two indecent assaults and two sexual assaults.
Cooney, of Marske-by-the-Sea near Redcar, told the court the carrot incident was a "practical joke".
The court heard how Cooney put the 12-inch carrot down his trousers and told a pupil in her 40s that a perfectly executed manoeuvre was so good that it had given him an erection.
He then took her hand and made her touch the vegetable before showing her the carrot, the court heard.
He denied placing her hand on his groin, but admitted hiding the vegetable in his pocket.
Naked photos
He told the jury: "I admit it was unprofessional, stupid, and I regret doing it.
"I just thought maybe I would play a practical joke, but obviously it was stupid."
Jailing him, Judge George Moorhouse, said: "You were in a position of trust."
Giving evidence, another of Cooney's pupils said when she failed her test he offered to waive the £80 she owed him if she pulled over into a lay-by and had sex with him.
She told the court: "I just said 'No thank you, Steve'."
He regularly groped her during lessons between August 2005 and February last year, the court heard.
When police arrested him they also found naked photos in the glove box of his Vauxhall Corsa.
God is on John Coleman's side
Quake Jolts Indonesia's Bali
The Associated Press
Friday, December 7, 2007; 6:56 AM
BALI, Indonesia -- An earthquake on Friday rattled Indonesia's resort island of Bali, where thousands of people were gathering for a U.N. climate change conference.
The Associated Press
Friday, December 7, 2007; 6:56 AM
BALI, Indonesia -- An earthquake on Friday rattled Indonesia's resort island of Bali, where thousands of people were gathering for a U.N. climate change conference.
K.O. brings it again...
This apparently means we still have free speech: "A pathological presidential liar, or an idiot-in-chief." What's wrong with both?
Countdown Special Comment: The NIE Reflects An “Unhinged, Irrational Chicken Little Of A President”
Finally, as promised, a Special Comment about the President’s cataclysmic deception about Iran.
There are few choices more terrifying than the one Mr. Bush has left us with tonight.
We have either a president who is too dishonest to restrain himself from invoking World War Three about Iran at least six weeks after he had to have known that the analogy would be fantastic, irresponsible hyperbole — or we have a president too transcendently stupid not to have asked — at what now appears to have been a series of opportunities to do so — whether the fairy tales he either created or was fed, were still even remotely plausible.
A pathological presidential liar, or an idiot-in-chief. It is the nightmare scenario of political science fiction: A critical juncture in our history and, contained in either answer, a president manifestly unfit to serve, and behind him in the vice presidency: an unapologetic war-monger who has long been seeing a world visible only to himself.
After Ms Perino’s announcement from the White House late last night, the timeline is inescapable and clear now.
In August, the President was told by his hand-picked Major Domo of intelligence, Mike McConnell, a flinty, high-strung-looking, worrying-warrior who will always see more clouds than silver linings, that what “everybody thought” about Iran might be, in essence, crap.
Yet on October 17th the President said of Iran and its president, Ahmadinejad:
“I’ve told people that if you’re interested in avoiding World War III, it seems like you ought to be interested in preventing them from have the knowledge to make a nuclear weapon.”
And as he said that, Mr. Bush knew that at bare minimum there was a strong chance that his rhetoric was nothing more than words with which to scare the Iranians.
Or was it, sir, to scare the Americans?
Does Iran not really fit into the equation here? Have you just scribbled it into the fill-in-the-blank on the same template you used to scare us about Iraq?
In August, any commander-in-chief still able-minded or uncorrupted or both, sir, would have invoked the quality the job most requires: mental flexibility.
A bright man, or an honest man, would have realized no later than the McConnell briefing that the only true danger about Iran was the damage that could be done by an unhinged, irrational Chicken Little of a president, shooting his mouth off, backed up by only his own hysteria and his own delusions of omniscience.
Not Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Mr Bush.
The Chicken Little of presidents is the one, sir, that you see in the mirror.
And the mind reels at the thought of a Vice President fully briefed on the revised intel as long as two weeks ago — briefed on the fact that Iran abandoned its pursuit of this imminent threat four years ago — who never bothered to mention it to his boss.
It is nearly forgotten today, but throughout much of Ronald Reagan’s presidency, it was widely believed that he was little more than a front-man for some never-viewed, behind-the-scenes string-puller.
Today, as evidenced by this latest remarkable, historic malfeasance, it is inescapable, that Dick Cheney is either this president’s evil ventriloquist, or he thinks he is.
What servant of any of the 42 previous presidents could possibly withhold information of this urgency and this gravity, and wind up back at his desk the next morning, instead of winding up before a Congressional investigation — or a criminal one?
Mr Bush — if you can still hear us — if you did not previously agree to this scenario in which Dick Cheney is the actual detective and you’re the Remington Steele — you must disenthrall yourself: Mr Cheney has usurped your constitutional powers, cut you out of the information loop, and led you down the path to an unprecedented presidency in which the facts have become optional, the intel is valued less than the hunch, and the assistant runs the store.
The problem is, sir, your assistant is robbing you — and your country — blind.
Not merely in monetary terms, Mr. Bush, but more importantly, robbing you of the traditions and righteousness for which we have stood, at great risk, for centuries: Honesty, Law, Moral Force.
Mr. Cheney has helped, sir, to make your administration into the kind our ancestors saw in the 1860’s and 1870’s and 1880’s — the ones that abandoned Reconstruction, and sent this country marching backwards into the pit of American Apartheid.
Grant, Hayes, Garfield, Arthur, Cleveland…
Presidents who will be remembered only in a blur of failure, Mr. Bush.
Presidents who will be remembered as functions only of those who opposed them — the opponents whom history proved right.
Grant, Hayes, Garfield, Arthur, Cleveland… Bush.
Would that we could let this President off the hook by seeing him only as marionette or moron.
But a study of the mutation of his language about Iran proves that though he may not be very good at it, he is, himself, still a manipulative, Machiavellian, snake-oil salesman.
The Bushian etymology was tracked by Dan Froomkin at the Washington Post’s website.
It is staggering.
March 31st: “Iran is trying to develop a nuclear weapon…”
June 5th: Iran’s “pursuit of nuclear weapons…”
June 19th: “consequences to the Iranian government if they continue to pursue a nuclear weapon…”
July 12th: “the same regime in Iran that is pursuing nuclear weapons…”
August 6th: “this is a government that has proclaimed its desire to build a nuclear weapon…”
Notice a pattern?
Trying to develop, build or pursue a nuclear weapon.
Then, sometime between August 6th and August 9th, those terms are suddenly swapped out, so subtly that only in retrospect can we see that somebody has warned the President, not only that he has gone out too far on the limb of terror — but there may not even be a tree there…
McConnell, or someone, must have briefed him then.
August 9th: “They have expressed their desire to be able to enrich uranium, which we believe is a step toward having a nuclear weapons program…”
August 28th: “Iran’s active pursuit of technology that could lead to nuclear weapons…”
October 4th: “you should not have the know-how on how to make a (nuclear) weapon…”
October 17th: “until they suspend and/or make it clear that they, that their statements aren’t real, yeah, I believe they want to have the capacity, the knowledge, in order to make a nuclear weapon.”
Before August 9th, it’s: “Trying to develop, build or pursue a nuclear weapon.”
After August 9th, it’s: “Desire, pursuit, want… knowledge, technology, know-how to enrich uranium.”
And we are to believe, Mr. Bush, that the National Intelligence Estimate this week talks of the Iranians suspending their nuclear weapons program in 2003…And you talked of the Iranians suspending their nuclear weapons program on October 17th…
And that term suspending is just a coincidence?
And we are to believe, Mr. Bush, that nobody told you any of this until last week?
Your insistence that you were not briefed on the NIE until last week might be legally true — something like “what the definition of ‘is’ is” — but with the subject matter being not interns but the threat of nuclear war.
Legally, it might save you from some war crimes trial… but ethically, it is a lie.
It is indefensible.
You have been yelling threats into a phone for nearly four months, after the guy on the other end had already hung up.
You, Mr. Bush, are a bald-faced liar.
And more over, you must have realized that John Bolton, and Norman Podhoretz, and the Wall Street Journal Editorial board, are also bald-faced liars.
We are to believe that the Intel Community, or maybe the State Department, cooked the raw intelligence about Iran, falsely diminished the Iranian nuclear threat, to make you look bad?
And you proceeded to let them make you look bad?
You not only knew all of this about Iran, in early August, but you also knew it was all accurate.
And instead of sharing this good news with the people you have obviously forgotten you represent, you merely fine-tuned your terrorizing of those people, to legally cover your own backside, while you filled the factual gap with sadistic visions of — as you phrased it on August 28th: a quote “nuclear holocaust” — and, as you phrased it on October 17th, quote: “World War III.”
My comments, Mr. Bush, are often dismissed as simple repetitions of the phrase “George Bush has no business being president.”
Well, guess what?
Tonight: hanged by your own words and convicted by your own deliberate lies…
You, sir, have no business being president.
Good night, and good luck.
Countdown Special Comment: The NIE Reflects An “Unhinged, Irrational Chicken Little Of A President”
Finally, as promised, a Special Comment about the President’s cataclysmic deception about Iran.
There are few choices more terrifying than the one Mr. Bush has left us with tonight.
We have either a president who is too dishonest to restrain himself from invoking World War Three about Iran at least six weeks after he had to have known that the analogy would be fantastic, irresponsible hyperbole — or we have a president too transcendently stupid not to have asked — at what now appears to have been a series of opportunities to do so — whether the fairy tales he either created or was fed, were still even remotely plausible.
A pathological presidential liar, or an idiot-in-chief. It is the nightmare scenario of political science fiction: A critical juncture in our history and, contained in either answer, a president manifestly unfit to serve, and behind him in the vice presidency: an unapologetic war-monger who has long been seeing a world visible only to himself.
After Ms Perino’s announcement from the White House late last night, the timeline is inescapable and clear now.
In August, the President was told by his hand-picked Major Domo of intelligence, Mike McConnell, a flinty, high-strung-looking, worrying-warrior who will always see more clouds than silver linings, that what “everybody thought” about Iran might be, in essence, crap.
Yet on October 17th the President said of Iran and its president, Ahmadinejad:
“I’ve told people that if you’re interested in avoiding World War III, it seems like you ought to be interested in preventing them from have the knowledge to make a nuclear weapon.”
And as he said that, Mr. Bush knew that at bare minimum there was a strong chance that his rhetoric was nothing more than words with which to scare the Iranians.
Or was it, sir, to scare the Americans?
Does Iran not really fit into the equation here? Have you just scribbled it into the fill-in-the-blank on the same template you used to scare us about Iraq?
In August, any commander-in-chief still able-minded or uncorrupted or both, sir, would have invoked the quality the job most requires: mental flexibility.
A bright man, or an honest man, would have realized no later than the McConnell briefing that the only true danger about Iran was the damage that could be done by an unhinged, irrational Chicken Little of a president, shooting his mouth off, backed up by only his own hysteria and his own delusions of omniscience.
Not Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Mr Bush.
The Chicken Little of presidents is the one, sir, that you see in the mirror.
And the mind reels at the thought of a Vice President fully briefed on the revised intel as long as two weeks ago — briefed on the fact that Iran abandoned its pursuit of this imminent threat four years ago — who never bothered to mention it to his boss.
It is nearly forgotten today, but throughout much of Ronald Reagan’s presidency, it was widely believed that he was little more than a front-man for some never-viewed, behind-the-scenes string-puller.
Today, as evidenced by this latest remarkable, historic malfeasance, it is inescapable, that Dick Cheney is either this president’s evil ventriloquist, or he thinks he is.
What servant of any of the 42 previous presidents could possibly withhold information of this urgency and this gravity, and wind up back at his desk the next morning, instead of winding up before a Congressional investigation — or a criminal one?
Mr Bush — if you can still hear us — if you did not previously agree to this scenario in which Dick Cheney is the actual detective and you’re the Remington Steele — you must disenthrall yourself: Mr Cheney has usurped your constitutional powers, cut you out of the information loop, and led you down the path to an unprecedented presidency in which the facts have become optional, the intel is valued less than the hunch, and the assistant runs the store.
The problem is, sir, your assistant is robbing you — and your country — blind.
Not merely in monetary terms, Mr. Bush, but more importantly, robbing you of the traditions and righteousness for which we have stood, at great risk, for centuries: Honesty, Law, Moral Force.
Mr. Cheney has helped, sir, to make your administration into the kind our ancestors saw in the 1860’s and 1870’s and 1880’s — the ones that abandoned Reconstruction, and sent this country marching backwards into the pit of American Apartheid.
Grant, Hayes, Garfield, Arthur, Cleveland…
Presidents who will be remembered only in a blur of failure, Mr. Bush.
Presidents who will be remembered as functions only of those who opposed them — the opponents whom history proved right.
Grant, Hayes, Garfield, Arthur, Cleveland… Bush.
Would that we could let this President off the hook by seeing him only as marionette or moron.
But a study of the mutation of his language about Iran proves that though he may not be very good at it, he is, himself, still a manipulative, Machiavellian, snake-oil salesman.
The Bushian etymology was tracked by Dan Froomkin at the Washington Post’s website.
It is staggering.
March 31st: “Iran is trying to develop a nuclear weapon…”
June 5th: Iran’s “pursuit of nuclear weapons…”
June 19th: “consequences to the Iranian government if they continue to pursue a nuclear weapon…”
July 12th: “the same regime in Iran that is pursuing nuclear weapons…”
August 6th: “this is a government that has proclaimed its desire to build a nuclear weapon…”
Notice a pattern?
Trying to develop, build or pursue a nuclear weapon.
Then, sometime between August 6th and August 9th, those terms are suddenly swapped out, so subtly that only in retrospect can we see that somebody has warned the President, not only that he has gone out too far on the limb of terror — but there may not even be a tree there…
McConnell, or someone, must have briefed him then.
August 9th: “They have expressed their desire to be able to enrich uranium, which we believe is a step toward having a nuclear weapons program…”
August 28th: “Iran’s active pursuit of technology that could lead to nuclear weapons…”
October 4th: “you should not have the know-how on how to make a (nuclear) weapon…”
October 17th: “until they suspend and/or make it clear that they, that their statements aren’t real, yeah, I believe they want to have the capacity, the knowledge, in order to make a nuclear weapon.”
Before August 9th, it’s: “Trying to develop, build or pursue a nuclear weapon.”
After August 9th, it’s: “Desire, pursuit, want… knowledge, technology, know-how to enrich uranium.”
And we are to believe, Mr. Bush, that the National Intelligence Estimate this week talks of the Iranians suspending their nuclear weapons program in 2003…And you talked of the Iranians suspending their nuclear weapons program on October 17th…
And that term suspending is just a coincidence?
And we are to believe, Mr. Bush, that nobody told you any of this until last week?
Your insistence that you were not briefed on the NIE until last week might be legally true — something like “what the definition of ‘is’ is” — but with the subject matter being not interns but the threat of nuclear war.
Legally, it might save you from some war crimes trial… but ethically, it is a lie.
It is indefensible.
You have been yelling threats into a phone for nearly four months, after the guy on the other end had already hung up.
You, Mr. Bush, are a bald-faced liar.
And more over, you must have realized that John Bolton, and Norman Podhoretz, and the Wall Street Journal Editorial board, are also bald-faced liars.
We are to believe that the Intel Community, or maybe the State Department, cooked the raw intelligence about Iran, falsely diminished the Iranian nuclear threat, to make you look bad?
And you proceeded to let them make you look bad?
You not only knew all of this about Iran, in early August, but you also knew it was all accurate.
And instead of sharing this good news with the people you have obviously forgotten you represent, you merely fine-tuned your terrorizing of those people, to legally cover your own backside, while you filled the factual gap with sadistic visions of — as you phrased it on August 28th: a quote “nuclear holocaust” — and, as you phrased it on October 17th, quote: “World War III.”
My comments, Mr. Bush, are often dismissed as simple repetitions of the phrase “George Bush has no business being president.”
Well, guess what?
Tonight: hanged by your own words and convicted by your own deliberate lies…
You, sir, have no business being president.
Good night, and good luck.
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Bad day at the office
Can't wait for the explanation here...
Fire crew aid in penis operation
Firefighters helped operate on a man who was rushed to hospital after getting a metal ring stuck on the end of his penis.
Doctors at Royal Wigan Infirmary in Greater Manchester put out the alert after fearing the man faced amputation as the ring cut off his blood supply.
Two firefighters used a mini hand grinder to cut through the ring during a 20-minute procedure.
It is understood the man, aged in his 40s, was given an anaesthetic.
The firefighters placed a thin sheet of metal around his penis to protect the skin while removing the ring, which appeared to have been cut off from the end of a pipe.
Greater Manchester Fire and Rescue Service confirmed fire crews were called to the hospital at around 12.10 GMT on Thursday to "deal with a situation".
A spokeswoman for Royal Wigan Infirmary said they were unable to comment about the incident.
Fire crew aid in penis operation
Firefighters helped operate on a man who was rushed to hospital after getting a metal ring stuck on the end of his penis.
Doctors at Royal Wigan Infirmary in Greater Manchester put out the alert after fearing the man faced amputation as the ring cut off his blood supply.
Two firefighters used a mini hand grinder to cut through the ring during a 20-minute procedure.
It is understood the man, aged in his 40s, was given an anaesthetic.
The firefighters placed a thin sheet of metal around his penis to protect the skin while removing the ring, which appeared to have been cut off from the end of a pipe.
Greater Manchester Fire and Rescue Service confirmed fire crews were called to the hospital at around 12.10 GMT on Thursday to "deal with a situation".
A spokeswoman for Royal Wigan Infirmary said they were unable to comment about the incident.
Snow in Chicago? Whatever...
Latest News - Updated 1:00 pm
JOHN GASTALDO / Union-Tribune
Batten down the hatches, again
A second round of rain expected over the next few days again raises the risk of flooding in areas burned in October's fires. The approaching storm should hammer the county with timing eerily similar to last week's storm.
How dry we were; now, another storm near / Weather blog
Surfers, onlookers stoked by monster waves
Big wave photo gallery / Swami's video / O.B. video
Local surf forecasts / Pollution risk closes some beaches
JOHN GASTALDO / Union-Tribune
Batten down the hatches, again
A second round of rain expected over the next few days again raises the risk of flooding in areas burned in October's fires. The approaching storm should hammer the county with timing eerily similar to last week's storm.
How dry we were; now, another storm near / Weather blog
Surfers, onlookers stoked by monster waves
Big wave photo gallery / Swami's video / O.B. video
Local surf forecasts / Pollution risk closes some beaches
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
If Brian Sabean actually does this he should be arrested, tried, convicted and sentenced for life in front of a firing squad.
Sources with both teams told the Toronto Globe and Mail that discussions between the Giants and Jays are focusing on a one-for-one swap of Tim Lincecum and Alex Rios. The Jays would prefer Matt Cain, but it appears they'll accept Lincecum, leaving it up to the Giants to decide.
Alex Rios? He ain't bad but...Alex Rios?
Alex Rios? He ain't bad but...Alex Rios?
Carroll responds to Decker's threats
Benjamin (Univ. of MD): Will, I'm sure you've had many questions about your call on the Tiger-Marlins deal. How did that deal go from dead (as you called it) to green light so quickly?
Will Carroll: I got suckered on that one (calling it dead). I'm not happy about it, but it was a trusted source with a team.
Also:
BREAKING -- looks like Fukudome will decide today. Someone made a big offer. My guess? Cubs.
Tim Lincecum is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
Not at all impressed with Bill James. He's boring.
The coffee in Nashville stinks.
Will Carroll: I got suckered on that one (calling it dead). I'm not happy about it, but it was a trusted source with a team.
Also:
BREAKING -- looks like Fukudome will decide today. Someone made a big offer. My guess? Cubs.
Tim Lincecum is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
Not at all impressed with Bill James. He's boring.
The coffee in Nashville stinks.
the closest thing to poetry we have
If you're chasing the chicken
Around the chicken yard
And you don't have him yet,
And the question is, how close are you?
The answer is, it's tough to characterize
Because there's lots of zigs and zags.
-- Donald Rumsfeld
the smiting goes on unabated
Rest of Today... Occasional snow showers. New snow accumulation up to 1 inch. Highs around 30. North winds 10 to 20 mph. Gusts up to 30 mph early in the afternoon.
Skilling: More storms
Wednesday's storm is only the opening salvo of a very active weather pattern which could see at least three additional systems--two of them potentially prolific precipitation producers--over the coming week.
Skilling: More storms
Wednesday's storm is only the opening salvo of a very active weather pattern which could see at least three additional systems--two of them potentially prolific precipitation producers--over the coming week.
the bees disappearing won't matter when this happens
God bless us, every one
QT Yellowstone Caldera (the eruptions of which can be violent enough to send a layer of ash 6 feet deep as far away as Chicago and which erupts every 600,000 or so years and last erupted 640,000 years ago) Update:
There were 34 earthquakes at Yellowstone in October.
There were 69 earthquakes in November.
There were 11 earthquakes the first three days of December.
The rise of magma beneath the ground continues at a record rate.
Ho, Ho, Ho!
But it wasn't progressive scan
News Item: Burglar breaks into Simply Amish store in Champaign and makes off with 42-inch plasma TV.
Add the Amish to the list of things that aren't what they used to be.
QT Yellowstone Caldera (the eruptions of which can be violent enough to send a layer of ash 6 feet deep as far away as Chicago and which erupts every 600,000 or so years and last erupted 640,000 years ago) Update:
There were 34 earthquakes at Yellowstone in October.
There were 69 earthquakes in November.
There were 11 earthquakes the first three days of December.
The rise of magma beneath the ground continues at a record rate.
Ho, Ho, Ho!
But it wasn't progressive scan
News Item: Burglar breaks into Simply Amish store in Champaign and makes off with 42-inch plasma TV.
Add the Amish to the list of things that aren't what they used to be.
I guess the Campus Squeeze just doesn't "get" fine architecture
The ninth ugliest campus in America just happens to be designed by acclaimed architects who've won major awards!
was their team sent to Iraq and replaced by walk-ons?
| | 1 | 2 | Total | |||||||
| Air Force | 26 | 26 | 52 | Final | ||||||
 | Northern Illinois | 31 | 32 | 63 | ||||||
| Convocation Center (DeKalb, IL) | |
| Box Score - Recap | |
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