Colbert on Adam Dunn and Craig Counsell: "The human body just does not naturally suck this hard"

Colbert Report: Sport Report - Baseball's Lowest Records, Gambling on Players & Stephen Controls MLB's Twitter Feed
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2000 labels - is that a lot?

And today we could really use a "brain-dead Norwegians" label.

I deleted "Alfonsucko SUCKS" but it won't let me create "Alfonsucko the 12-fingered freak SUCKS." I don't see how the work of the Nation can move forward.

This appears to be a new feature?

Time to close shop?

You're not going to believe this shit: we have reached blogger's limit of 2000 labels. (I tried "America hating Conservatives now happy" with the last post.) Yeah, i know, WHAT THE FUCK? I mean, the PHOKKING THING SUCKS! Since the labels are the chief reason to be here, and since no one posts anymore since Obama was elected and everything is better now, is there a point to carry on? Also, Blogger can blow it out the ass. I can't even add a "Blogger SUCKS" label now. And that sucks because THEY SUCK. I mean, i'm really beside myself here.

Thoughts? Better yet, how can we bring Blogger down in a fiery crash?

Everybody Cranky

Quick Vote

Have you ever displayed or witnessed 'queue rage' -- visible anger or violence resulting from waiting in line?

Yes 70% 92281
No 30% 40255

Total Votes: 132536

read related article »

This is not a scientific poll, but it is profoundly idiotic

In fact, we have hardly heard his name mentioned lately... is he playing football again? I did not know that...

Favre flying under radar in Green Bay on Monday

Bud Selig remains brain-dead (cont'd)

Could be headed towards another tie. And yet, this determines which league has home field advantage in the World Series. Another BRILLIANT move, Bud (the "traditionalist"). Go phokk yourself, moron.

In related news, why are these guys All-Stars:

Kosuke Fukudome (Cubs fanz...brain-free)
Alfonso Soriano (see Fuku)
Cristian Guzman (he's been an All-Star twice?)
Miguel Tejada (maybe 3 years ago)
Brian Wilson (the Giants sent Lincecum, so why this guy? He SUCKS.)
Carlos Marmol (maybe a month ago)
Billy GUTLESS Wagner (if what Clint Hurdle said is true, why is Mr. Gutless on the team? Funny. Who TOTALLY SUCKED and allowed the tying run to score? Thanks Billy, you phokking brain-dead HICK moron.)
Ichiro Suzuki (the most overrated player anywhere? if he's not hitting .340 he's pretty worthless)
Derek Jeter (and his .740 OPS? PATHETIC. Yankees fans SUCK.)
Jason Varitek (batting avg. is a poor measure of a player's worth, but .219?)
Michael Young (.777 OPS? not that good)
Joe Crede (is this a joke?)
Carlos Guillen (ok, but an All-Star? no...)

Oh yeah, Cristian Guzman has NEVER played 3rd base in the majors. But he's there tonight. And this game determines who has home field advantage in the World Series? So remarkably brain-dead you would think Bud was in the Bush Administration (i know he's a Democrat, but that must be a Joe Lieberman "Democrat", right?). Maybe a couple of these guys should play the WHOLE game so you don't run out of players? Maybe use some relief pitchers more than one inning? Maybe get Bud a brain transplant?

Oh yeah, it's almost 1am in NYC...

On da udder hand, Guzman is picking it at 3rd...

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the outrages keep pouring in (cont'd), or, look who's hating freedom today, or, the sex industry should be run more like a gubmint bureaucracy

Tax on Sex Industry Proposed in California

giant sucking sound

PHILADELPHIA (AP)—Tim Redding took a one-hitter into the eighth inning and Ryan Zimmerman hit a solo homer to help the Washington Nationals stay unbeaten with a 1-0 victory over the Philadelphia Phillies on Wednesday night.

Smiff infiltrates UN

On World Meteorological Day, UN issues call for improved climate observations

if you want your blood to boil while projectile vomiting...

Watch The Rezzidunce endorse McCrazy...
Scroll down past Hillary (yuch!):

http://weblogs.baltimoresun.com/news/politics/blog/

Among the many insane things said here, the craziest is always when Dumbya talks about "respecting life":

"...how to have a culture that respects the dignity of every human being."

By every, of course, he only means rich phokks who might give him some money. How about those children not getting health care through S-CHIP? How's their dignity, Mr. President? Oh yeah, FUCK YOU, KIDS! The soldiers in Iraq? the veterans back home? FUCK YOU, too, suckers! The thousands of dead Iraqis? FUCK YOU--they don't even count as human beings, everybody knows dat. ETC. Well, i can't wait to see Mr. FUCKFACE on the campaign trail trying to scare up votes (literally) for McCryptkeeper...

If it's Bush III: IV More Wars, who is going to blow Smiff's brains out because surely i will not be able to take this anymore...

Poll: Obama overtakes Clinton, tied with McCain

Feb. 27 (Bloomberg) -- Barack Obama moved ahead of Hillary Clinton in the battle for the Democratic presidential nomination, and is in a dead heat in a general-election fight against Republican John McCain, who enjoys an advantage on national-security issues.

A Bloomberg/Los Angeles Times survey shows Obama is preferred by Democratic primary voters 48 percent to 42 percent, the first time he has overtaken Clinton in a Bloomberg/Times poll. In a general-election match-up among registered voters, McCain is 2 points ahead of Obama, within the margin of error; he beats Clinton by 6 points.

McCain runs ahead of Obama on every issue except health care.* The Arizona senator has a 13-point advantage on Iraq and a 37- point lead on terrorism. He also does better on managing the economy. One area where Obama has a clear edge is on the question of who would bring the most change in Washington; the Illinois senator has an almost 3-to-1 lead.

*Un-freaking-believable. Yes, very strong on national security: a proven failure who is promising a constant state of war and 100--why not 1,000--years in Iraq. Please, GIVE ME MORE OF THAT...AND DON'T FORGET THE REACH-AROUND! Jesus Phokking Christ already, how FUCKING STUPID IS THIS COUNTRY??

Oh yes, and the economy: McCain has stated he "doesn't understand it."

Does K-Mad still have dat "How to move to Canada" book?

Smiff rips Schilling on his blog (cont'd)

Your comment is awaiting moderation.

Just wondering if Curt and the other McCain supporters (like ajd24) here will be volunteering for the military to fight the other wars McCain is promising, along with a 100 year commitment to staying in Iraq. Bush has decimated our military (where will McCain be getting all of the troops he will need for Iran and so forth?), so can we count on you to join up?

And Obama has said he will be committed to finding bin Laden (remember him?), you know, the head terrorist guy…

Who's to blame: Fung, dats who

Zydrunas Ilgauskas hit 10-of-10 shots from the floor on Wednesday for 24 points, six rebounds, four assists and three blocks in an easy win over the Wizards. Big Z was great tonight and was playing through a bruised shin. Obviously, he had no problems with the shin, or Brendan Haywood, tonight.

The Rochester Zeniths would have been reaping the fruits of this labor if i didn't have to sit players because no one, like, oh, Commissioner Fung, told me about the asinine "maximum games" rule until a third of the way through the season (an obvious conspiracy to keep Smiff from finishing in the money in anudder Yahoo league...). So i wasted a bunch of games early in the season on players i shouldn't have been playing. If i do anything in this league it will be to finish ahead of Parcers' Bud Lite, a Zimbabwean used car salesman from Chicago...

So... New England wins another game they should have lost?

Yawn.

Add 18-0 football teams to the list of things that ain't what they used to be.

Tom Brady? They won despite "Mr. Interception" today. They're always covering for this guy. But what do you expect from a 2nd stringer from Michigan?

And i have to root for the Giants now? Fuck that - i'm going to go to a movie or sumfting. Man alive, Green Bay SUCKS. Two losses to the Bears and now this? That's one shitty season right there.

something totally shocking (cont'd)

2008 already SUCKS

How much more will you pay for craft beer? "My suspicion is a buck a six-pack," says Hugh Sisson, president of Clipper City Brewing Co. in Baltimore...

Very hoppy beers might increase even more or just disappear from the market as the supply of prized aroma hops dries up.

Oh yeah, and the Cats are getting spanked. By Penn State.

a proposal that works for everyone

A poll on channel 7 during the Bears game revealed that Bears fans who respond to polls on channel 7 regard Donovan McNabb as the team's most likely starting quarterback in 2008. If true, the Eagles will need a quarterback, and Grossman will need a team... just sayin...

oh, really

From the local "news" tonight:

"The computer models are in disagreement over how much rain we will get on Wednesday."

So what the phokk good are they?

Smiff's prediction: seeing as it's Friday, your "forecast" is totally worthless and the computer "models" should be printed out and used for terlet paper. And thanks for wasting everyone's time.

tough one today

NY Giants 21
Chicago 16

Bring on Orton 99.35
S#i+ Blowing Up 179.30

Smiff done with 24

I watched 24 because it was entertaining (yet completely ridiculous), but last season TOTALLY SUCKED, and the "torture method of the week" got really tired. (I also read that they're bringing back a character somehow WHO WAS KILLED, and turning him from a "good guy" to a "bad guy"). Then there's this moron:

“24″ Creator Thinks Clinton As President “Is Nuts”
The man who has created several presidents for the hit TV show “24″ says it’s “nuts” to think of New York Sen. Hillary Clinton being the next real president.
“I’m not even sure that Hillary is a fait accompli [to be the Democratic nominee] at this point,” Joel Surnow, the executive producer of the Fox show, told reporters and bloggers over the weekend, according to the Washington Times. “Are we nuts thinking Hillary Clinton could be president of this country?”
“Honest to God, just stand back and think about it,” he added.

Well, she ain't my first choice, and maybe not even my 6th, but after eight years of you-know-who it's hard to think that just about ANYONE* elected could be considered "nuts." What's nuts is what's been going on the last 7 years. Has Surnow been producing the show from France or somewhere? Honest to God, does he know who is president RIGHT NOW? So if the writers' strike ends and 24 does come back, Joel Surnow can take the first script, shove it up his @$$, and phokk off while doing it.

*I'm talking serious candidates on both sides, not total nutjobs like Tancredo and Hunter with less than 1% support.