I heard George Halas sent him a box of chocolates

Sports reporter's Singletary goof mortifies Fox
In addition to the postgame fire and brimstone that has made him a YouTube legend already, new 49ers coach Mike Singletary was part of another moment Sunday that's a video sensation. During a pregame interview, Fox Sports sideline reporter Danyelle Sargent asked him: "I heard your mentor Bill Walsh was one of the first phone calls that you made when you found out that you had the job. What does it mean to you to coach the 49ers?" Singletary was understandably tongue-tied, since Walsh died in July 2007. Fox producers were understandably mortified and didn't air that portion of the interview. But the clip was part of the "open feed" that news organizations access. Sargent has earned Internet infamy before; in 2006, she cursed on the air, thinking her microphone was off.


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Bruce Bochy: not exactly brimming wiff brainz

Tim Lincecum took a shutout into the ninth inning Monday and ended up allowed two runs -- one earned -- in 8 1/3 innings in a win over the Diamondbacks. Lincecum, who started the ninth with a 6-0 lead, threw 127 pitches to help the Giants improve to 17 games under .500. We'd hate to see what kind of workload the team would be saddling him with if it was actually in contention...
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roids are a terrible thing to waste on Clemensez brainz

Koby Clemens was among three Single-A players arrested Saturday night following an apparent bar fight. Clemens and Mark Ori were charged with disorderly conduct, while Jimmy Goethals was charged with assault and battery. All three players were benched for Salem's game Sunday and the team's season comes to a close Monday. A 21-year-old catcher, Clemens has hit .268/.369/.423 with seven homers and a 99/61 K/BB ratio in 109 games at Single-A.
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The brain-dead troglodyte is back...

...Yes, The Awful Brett Myers!!! I see that he STILL SUCKS! Though i suppose the good news here is that he not only didn't serve up a grand slam, but allowed no homers at all. So take dat, HATERS (myself). Still, i hate the man. HATE.

Bottom 1st: NY Mets
- J. Reyes grounded out to second
- E. Chavez walked
- D. Wright walked, E. Chavez to second
- C. Delgado walked, E. Chavez to third, D. Wright to second
- C. Beltran walked, E. Chavez scored, D. Wright to third, C. Delgado to second
- M. Anderson grounded out to second, D. Wright scored, C. Delgado to third, C. Beltran to second
- D. Easley grounded out to third
2 runs, 0 hits, 0 errors
Philadelphia 0, NY Mets 2
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Ed Wade: he's a modern-day Robin Hood...

...for crappy, veteran relief pitchers:

Oscar Villarreal has refused his assignment to Triple-A, with the Houston Chronicle reporting that the Astros will release him if they can't find a taker via trade. Villarreal was designated for assignment last week, just three months after inking a two-year, $2.85 million deal with the Astros.
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add The Internets to the list of things John McCain knows nothing about

“Aware of the Internet,” Computer Non-User McCain Touts eBay as Recession Cure

McCain campaign aide Mark Soohoo reassured voters that “John McCain is aware of the Internet” and “You don’t actually have to use a computer to understand how it shapes the country.”

Earlier this year, the Politico’s Mike Allen (video here) asked the GOP presidential contenders whether they used a PC or Mac. In his response, McCain revealed that when it comes to high tech devices large (like private jets) or small (like personal computers), he is dependent on his beer heiress wife: “Neither. I’m an illiterate that has to rely on my wife for all of the assistance I can get.”

And when all else fails for distressed homeowners, McCain’s Americans should just join the rapidly growing ranks of those:
“Doing what is necessary — working a second job, skipping a vacation, and managing their budgets — to make their payments on time.”
Of course, John McCain isn’t speaking from personal experience when it comes to either computers or financial hardship. (As it turns out, one of McCain’s 8 homes - the one with “remote control window coverings” - is now up for sale.) Knowing even less than Ted Stevens (”series of tubes”) or George W. Bush (who “clicks around” on “the Google”), John McCain nonetheless offered the Internet as the answer for Americans struggling to make ends meet.

Yes, The Computer: that's some hi-tech shit. They've only been around for, uh, decades... I wonder if he can use the bathroom by himself, or does he rely on adult diapers?

Joe Morgan's "trivia question" of the night

What player hit the hardest line drives the most consistently?

Joe's conjecture on this? He saw him play and he hit the ball hard the most consistently. That's the key. Also, he won a batting title. One of only dozens of players to do so. Sounds pretty good to me. And lo and behold, when i looked up this player's "hard line drive rate" i found he did in fact have the highest career percentage of hard line drives - a whopping 63%.

So who is this line drive God? Several hints: he is not in the Hall of Fame, he was a 7-time All Star, and finished with 2743 career hits. No peeking! If you know the answer, consider yourself as smart as Joe Morgan.

Chip Caray Nails It: Or how to make 4 mistakes in 7 words

In praising Jimy Williams work ethic with young players, said:

"Adam Everett, who is a young, budding star with the Houston Astros..."

Let's see, he plays for Minnesota now.

Not young: he's 31 years old.

Not budding: he has been on a major league roster since 2001.

A star? Ok, the guy is good fielding SS, but his career batting line is .246/.298/.355. He's the definition of "good field, no hit" and has been since he was young and budding.

Chip's bulb is dimmer than Skip's and Harry's, and that is saying A LOT.

However, on the list of Carays I Hate, he only places 3rd:

1) Skip Caray
2) Harry Caray
3) Chip Caray

Another example of a retarded Cubs fan

This has to be one of the most stupidest sites on the interweb.

To Eliot Spitzer...

...we've all been there. Spending $4,300 a pop on a prostitute, transporting her across state lines, and using a friend's name as a pseudonym (in my case, Decker's)? Yep. But since i don't know how to text, i wasn't stupid enough to do that. I also don't have a hot wife and three daughters, and i'm not the governor of Kollyfornia (yet). Also, “to do things that, like, you might not think were safe”? I can't imagine what this could be--Decker, can you help out a bud here? Maybe it involves standing on your head?

But my real point is merely to point out the fact dat Spitzer is a super-delegate for Hillary.

Tim Russert is a Putz

So i'm watching the 2nd part of last night's debate and they just spent 10+ minutes on Louis Farrakhan?!?!

WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING IMPORTANT?

Hey Tim Russert: Go Fuck Yourself.

OBP? Dusty still doesn't roll that way...

Reds manager Dusty Baker indicated on Monday that he'd likely keep Brandon Phillips in the cleanup spot this season. "Brandon will probably hit third someday*," Baker said. "But, right now, I need to him break up Junior and (Adam) Dunn." Ken Griffey Jr. always hits third whether he deserves to or not, suggesting that Phillips will clean up and Dunn's superior OBP will again land in the fifth spot. Baker could have gotten more creative given his lack of prototypical top-of-the-order guys, but that's not his style.

*Funny!

Romney: Quitter

The one ad he kept running out here was about how different he is from Hillary Clinton (maybe that's why she did so well here?). Willard seemed to be running his campaign in reverse - it was if he had already won the Republican nomination and was running against Hillary, who had won the Democratic nomination. I know that for many conservatives, just saying "Hillary Clinton" causes them to grow horns and a third eyeball, but MITT YOU WEREN'T RUNNING AGAINST HER. How about running some ads about McCain being a flip-flopper instead of a "straight talker". Or that fact that he said he doesn't know anything about the economy. Or the fact that he cozies upto and makes deals with pinko commies like Feingold and Ed Kennedy. Nope, he stuck with how "Hillary-care" was going to send everyone to the grave. What a maroon. And this guy made millions as a bidnessman? It must not be very hard then.

Oh, and this is priceless...

Romney at today's CPAC Wingnut Conference: ”If I fight on in my campaign, all the way to the convention, I would forestall the launch of a national campaign and make it more likely that Senator Clinton or Obama would win. And in this time of war, I simply cannot let my campaign, be a part of aiding a surrender to terror.”

Well, I'm starting a "My S#i+ Don't Stink" campaign...

Bush aiming to establish positive legacy

I'm putting one thing in the positive column for now: did not start war with Iran. Of course, this could change by tomorrow. Can't think of anything else. Anyone?

more on rewarding incompetence

Hmmm, maybe the New York Fucking Times will give Dumbya his own column, too...

Bill Kristol is rewarded for being “wrong” on everything: NY Times gig is a comin’

This is really sick - especially when you consider it is happening at a time when the country is clearly moving more progressive, and there are so many good progressive columnists who have guest columned for the Times before (Ehrenreich, Katha Pollit, Tom Frank, etc.).
Either way - it is an absolute abomination from the standpoint of basic accountability. A pundit being factually wrong on almost everything he hung his hat on is rewarded by the largest newspaper in the world for his track record. If ever there was an example of the world of journalism literally thumbing its nose at basic accountability, this example of Bill Kristol falling up is it.

just another Bush incompetent

White House Press Secretary Dana Perino: "I know nothing about the Cuban Missile Crisis."

Dead Weight Is Back With A Vengeance

Didn't take him long to reclaim his previous standing as the "Worst GM In Baseball." Just horrendous...

Astros signed second baseman Kaz Matsui, who had been with the Rockies, to a three-year, $16.5 million contract. Matsui gets an extra $1.5 million from what was originally reported. "Kaz is an ideal fit for our club," Astros GM Ed Wade said. "Kaz runs extremely well. He steals bases, moves runners and takes the extra base. He plays the game the right way." Getting redundant already? He's also injury-prone, he doesn't hit lefties and his career high in RBI is 44.

Is that all?

U.S. spending on Iraq, Afghanistan will hit $1.6 trillion: report

The wars in Iraq and Afghanistan will have cost the United States at least $1.6 trillion by 2008, according to a report by Congress's Joint Economic Committee that is scheduled to be released Tuesday on Capitol Hill.

...the war efforts would reach $1.6 trillion for the period between 2002 and 2008, roughly $20,900 for each family of four. (or $83,600 per person)

The committee also said that costs could be expected to rise, reaching up to $3.5 trillion between 2003 and 2017.

The total is roughly double the $804 billion the White House has already requested to finance the missions, the report stated. "The full economic costs of the war to American taxpayers and the overall U.S. economy go well beyond even the immense federal budget costs already reported," it read.

Some conclusions:
1) Maybe Dumbya should have majored in math instead of cheer leading at Yale? And that Harvard MBA? May as well be on used terlet paper.
2) HYOOOGE mistakes were made.
3) More tax cuts are needed for the very wealthy and the military contractors making a killing off the war.
4) You kids who need S-CHIP: go phokk yourselves. Better yet, just die already.
5) And in related news, let us not forget that Pres. Man-Child is a fiscal conservative:

Bush wields veto pen — again

NEW ALBANY, Ind. - President Bush, escalating his budget battle with Congress, on Tuesday vetoed a spending measure for health and education programs prized by congressional Democrats.

Bush hammered Democrats for what he called a tax-and-spend philosophy:

"The Congress now sitting in Washington holds this philosophy," Bush told an audience of business and community leaders. "The majority was elected on a pledge of fiscal responsibility, but so far it's acting like a teenager with a new credit card."

Thank you, he'll be here all week. And his philosophy? It's called borrow-and-spend-and-when-the-bill-comes-due-and-the-depression-hits-I'll-
be-cutting-brush-at-the-ranch-Suckers!

He's Back: Ed Wade Still An Idiot

Astros acquired outfielder Michael Bourn, RHP Geoff Geary and third baseman Mike Costanzo from the Phillies for RHP Brad Lidge and infielder Eric Bruntlett.
Mike Costanzo: He's a long shot to contribute in the majors.
Geoff Geary: Impossible. There was simply no way Ed Wade was going to pull off a five-player deal without getting himself a veteran middle reliever. It couldn't happen.
Michael Bourn: If you look at it as one year of Lidge for five for Bourn, it doesn't seem so bad. Still, the Astros just weakened their pen and their offense with this stroke.... Bourn wasn't a great OBP guy at the top levels of the minors and he strikes out quite a bit. He's a terrific defender and baserunner, but if he doesn't get on-base enough to be a leadoff guy, he'll barely be an adequate regular.
Brad Lidge: We're not at all impressed with Ed Wade's first move as Houston's GM. Bourn could have a long career as a fair regular, but he's basically another Willy Taveras for the Astros. If Lidge's arrival in Philadelphia results in Brett Myers' return to the rotation, this could be a big winner for Pat Gillick.

Republican hypocrites sure know how to have fun

Crossdressing Republican Lawmaker Admits Sexual Encounter With Male Escort

The police report contains an account of how Curtis allegedly donned women’s clothing, red stockings and a black sequined lingerie top before engaging in a sex act at the store. He then continued to wear them throughout the night under his clothing, the report says.

No pearls with that outfit?