I did not make this up

Prairie Chicken Head Giveaway (First 1,500 Fans)

This may be one of the most unique giveaways in the history of the sports, and you don't want to miss it! The first 1,500 fans will receive a Prairie Chicken Head. Get to the park early, because these are sure to go fast!
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Meet the King ... the Prairie King

Best comment: "Can you eat them??"



Welcome to Boomer Country!
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"If Carnival and Las Vegas had a baby, this would be the placenta"

"The Marlins are planning a structure beyond the center-field wall of their new ballpark. This structure will light up and make a fancy hullabaloo whenever a Marlin hits a home run. And remember, they have Mike Stanton, so they could be firing up this thing quite a bit.

"Now close your eyes, and think about what this structure might look like. Go ahead. Let your imagination run wild...

"Behold. This is what will happen when the Marlins hit a home run. It's what Bernie Brewer thinks he's sliding down after a couple buttons of peyote. Don't avert your eyes. Look at it. Study it. This is what we've become."
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Please delight in this curious trifle, to-day

There is probably an interesting story behind that

News item: Dodgers Dress Mexican Pitcher As Taco
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BREAKING: Cubs fire GM Jim "Anchovies" Hendry after 9 sad, beautiful years

Could be good for the Cubs, but bad for this blog, and for scrappy, middle-aged ballplayers everywhere. In tribute, I'm cramming in one last round of Hendry tags.

Empty seats in Chicago this week

Sox vs. first-place Twins
Tuesday: 11,000 empty seats
Wednesday: 10,000 empty seats
Thursday: 13,000 empty seats

Blackhawks practice (not exhibition game, just practice)
Saturday: sold out

Brain-Dead Angelenos

Bears draw more viewers than Dodgers. In Los Angeles.

more Olympics shenanigans

News Item: "Extra innings will have a new look in what could be baseball's last Olympic appearance. Each team's at-bat in the 11th inning and beyond will begin with runners on first and second base. Teams may start the 11th at any point in their batting order. . . ."

Or put it another way: The game of baseball has already had its last Olympic appearance.