How to market baseball in Texas

Kids! Get a Rangers football Sunday night!

Coming to Ryan's Defense

Have we gone mad?

Or are we just so sex-obsessed and confused that this is really a story? I didn't stick around to see the piece on the today show this morning, but I read the story in the Sun-Times today. "Rex-Rated." Elliott Harris reports that "there may be more trouble afoot for the New York Jets." Brilliant. Ryan and his wife may be in trouble for what - making a foot-fetish video.

My goodness. They are married. The news is that there are videos on the internet which have surfaced which allegedly show Michelle Ryan showing her feet and in which the voice of Rex Ryan can be allegedly heard, supposedly in a state of increasing excitement. Rex when asked says this is a personal matter.

Where is the story here? They are married. Frankly if they wanted to make videos of themselves going at it and broadcast them on the interwebs, I don't know why that isn't an affirmation of their love and a sign of the strength of their marriage. Maybe slightly misguided, but there are lots of misguided people in the world. The guy is attracted to his wife. He digs feet. She's into it. Sounds like they decided together to make movies about it, presumably so they could watch later and enjoy themselves. Maybe they decided to share them with other people, but so what? It shouldn't be any big secret that married people have sex. (Hint: this includes your old parents fumbling around in the twilight and then icing-down afterwards). I have even been told that unmarried people have sex - but we all know that God doesn't approve of this.

I don't know who gives a good God damn about this. The big difference between this and the Jenn Sterger thing is that Favre and Sterger weren't married. (Though frankly if Deana Farve was fine with it - I wouldn't have any problems with that either). Here's what we have learned about the Jets this year - (1) Grown men sometimes swear, (2) football players sometimes put their own financial interests ahead of the interests of the team, (3) men in a locker room will cat call a hot blonde in a locker room, sometimes inappropriately, (4) powerful men sometimes try to use their power to bed attractive single women, even when they are married and (5) Rex Ryan loves his wife. If any of these things resulted in an epiphany for you or a loved one, I'd suggest you need to get out more.

Unofficial, unconfirmed list of bowl eligible teams not going to a bowl game

Temple 8-4
Western Michigan 6-6

Ok, let's call it confirmed.

More proof that majority rule in the hands of a really stupid populace is a toxic mix

Which day would you rather see become a national sports holiday?

Monday after Super Bowl 57%
Friday of NCAA tournament first round 43%
Total votes 193,353
Results not scientific, but profoundly idiotic

Today's Factoid
Fun facts about the profoundly idiotic culture we live in...
Games broadcast on Friday of NCAA tournament first round: 16
Games broadcast on Monday after Super Bowl: 0
~

Brain-Dead Angelenos

Bears draw more viewers than Dodgers. In Los Angeles.

But you can't put a price tag on the rewards

News item: Bears rank fourth in NFL with an average ticket price of $88.33.
~

stop me if you've heard this one before

News item: Favre's agent: 'It's a done deal' that QB will sign with Vikings

nobody saw this coming

News item: Favre to meet with Vikings

Maybe Fung could translate this?

Man of Kent is a delicious stop up Rte 7 in upstate New York on the way to Vermont. Adam reminded me of it today - and I decided to visit it on the web and found this:

Man of Kent Cricket Club Enjoy a Friendly Win

Match report by Nigel Johnson

Scorecard

Hoosick NY, August 13th 2006.

Well, it could have been the biggest banana skin ever, but in fact turned into one of our best performances and that takes into account a feisty and youthful opponent who thought they could win. It was the best day for Summer cricket and the wicket looked great, even with the minor problems of the pitch markings (!) Steve showed up with 10 High Schoolers from the electric city, and more than a few of them had serious cricket genes, and it was great to see Alton again, and there is for sure no better ambassador of cricket to mentor this new team, lead by Matthew Persaud, son of Maurice Persaud - need I say more. Evidently these kids had been practicing every Tuesday for some time now, and probably with the senior squad on Friday's, and I am sure that after our failure against the Mad Dogs, Steve thought we were ripe for the taking - well the best laid plans of Weisse and men, we proved 'em wrong. And did we!!

It did not start well, when this Captain lost the toss, and was pleasantly surprised when we were asked to bat first. I always go on the principal that it is far better to have the runs on the board, than to chase down runs on a worn wicket. Kumar and I opened the innings and rode our luck a little, having to deal with some short "bodyline" bowling, and accurate medium pace from their Captain. Still we were able to stick around long enough to take the sting out of the bowling attack before I succumbed to a mistimed shot and was caught out of their Captains bowling, still we had close to 40 runs on the board and a significant improvement on our previous effort. I can't recall the batting order but it seemed that everyone was more or less able to put runs on the board, and especially Kumar, Balki, Kirk, Mick and top scorer Eric who plundered some "sit up and beg" bowling in the middle overs. 100 runs appeared and went, along with 150, and we batted out our allotted 30 overs with great aplomb, garnering a total of 190 some for 9. Good efforts also from Allen with his ever present runner Balki, and Joe, who will want to forget his nightmare dismissal, I'm sure.

After our mid innings break we went out confident of a defensible total, especially with our bowling line up. Kumar and Neel opened the bowling and runs from the opposition were slow, apart from punishing the occasional loose ball. Balki, Kirk, Tim, and Eric followed and pretty much finished them off, and we certainly were able to take every chance that came on offer. Great catches taken, return throws, a neat stumping, and some stump splitting bowling ripped out wickets at regular intervals and in the end it was only a matter of time before the inevitable happened. I must say that from my vantage point behind the wicket I thought that Steve was a little too eager for success, especially with his umpiring calls (!) But it was a credit that everyone stuck to their task with victory in sight. Well done indeed to the team. Moving on now, I don't know who is available for practice tonight but a show of hands would help decide. I have a knee strain and will not be able to participate tonight, and have work commitments for this Sunday and possibly next Thursday (!) So please speak up if you want to practice and so something can be coordinated. In terms of games we are pretty much done at the school now, but it would be worth planning an away game or two in September if there was some interest. So shabbash to all for a great team effort on Sunday - a great way to close out the year, short as it is at Hoosac.

What does this mean Fung?

our long regional nightmare is finally over

Florida Atlantic 24, Central Michigan 21
Louisiana Tech 17, Northern Illinois 10
Rice 38, Western Michigan 14
Connecticut 38, Buffalo 20
Tulsa 45, Ball State 13

If George Bush's FEMA had a football league, this would be it.

Obama transition: the sucking begins

Two problems today. We'll dispense with the easy one first: there's no such thing as a hypoallergenic dog. You would think a nerdy, Mister Science, I-can-pronounce-nuclear smartypants would have known that already.

The second one is more complicated. An eight team playoff? That would leave out a 12-0 Ball State, who is around the mid-teens in the polls now and would probably be around 12th by the end of the year if they stay undefeated. Can you really leave out the undefeated champion of a Division 1-A conference? Wouldn't that sort of defeat the point of a playoff?

There are 11 Division 1-A (or FBS or whatever-the-phokk they're calling it now) conferences. A fair playoff would have to take them all, and would still leave room for five at-large whiners. Of course, you still have the controversy between the fifth at-large whiner and the sixth at-large whiner, just like you have controversies among the 64th-65th-66th-67th teams in basketball. No getting around that.

With a 16-team field, you could play the eight first-round games on January 1st to preserve some of the tradition of New Year's Day. If everyone who feels entitled to a payout is feeling cooperative enough, they might even preserve some of the Bowl names and sponsorships. Over the rest of January, play rounds two and three, and set up the championship game for the Saturday of Super Bowl weekend for a two-day football and snack food frenzy. What could possibly go wrong?

We are living in a golden age (cont)

JOHNSON WANTS TO BE OCHO CINCO, LEGALLY
Posted by Michael David Smith on August 12, 2008, 7:24 p.m. EDT

Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson was fined $5,000 for wearing “Ocho Cinco” on the back of his jersey before a game in 2006.

To avoid getting fined, Johnson hasn’t done it since then. But Johnson now has a plan for how he can get away with having “Ocho Cinco” spelled out over the “85″ on his back.

We’ve learned that Johnson has taken the first steps in the state of Florida toward legally changing his last name to Ocho Cinco.

Seriously.

If Johnson follows through on this, his actual, legal name will be Chad Ocho Cinco, and the NFL would then (we assume) allow him to put his new last name on the back of his jersey.

From a business standpoint, this might be Chad’s way of picking up some of the extra cash that he wants to make but that the team has said it won’t give him. The jersey would instantly become one of the NFL’s top sellers, and NFL players get a cut of all sales of their jerseys.

In recent interviews, including one on ESPN Monday night, Johnson has made veiled references about future plans that he has said will change the way fans think about him. This is a strange one, to say the least.

Coming to the NFL?

Yahoo excitedly reported on the A-11 offense being run by high school teams.

*

The base offense is one in which a center and two tight ends surround the football, three receivers are split right, three more split left and two quarterbacks stand behind in a shotgun, one of whom has to be at least 7 yards behind the line of scrimmage.

*

An NFL coach, who identified himself only as Lovie S. has apparently contacted Steve Humphries, creator of the formation, about whether it can be modified to operate without quarterbacks or wide-receivers.

A lot of why I feel mostly disgust when I watch football

is explained in this article better than I've ever been able to say it.

And Gene Upshaw is a disease:

July 12, 2008
Can Of Corn
Double Standards

by Dayn Perry

The unfortunate reality—both now and throughout recent decades—is that football as the NFL practices it is the most popular sport in the United States. There's no accounting for taste, of course, but this fact nonetheless speaks ill of our ability as a people to make sensible choices as consumers. Subjectively, as a nation it's a matter of our favoring a sport that's far less entertaining and compelling than what MLB offers us; objectively—and more importantly—it's a case of our favoring a sport that's morally bankrupt in comparison to leagues of similar aims and dimensions.

It's not a question that's often asked: Is the NFL somehow less "moral" than MLB? However, it's an important one to ask, and it's one that, I think, has a clear answer.

First, in comparing the two industries, there's the noisome labor structure of the NFL. It's the most violent of major professional team sports (more on that in a moment), and it's the one that's most structurally hostile toward its workforce. Mostly, this is the fault of the NFLPA and Gene Upshaw, who's less a fire-eyed labor leader than an obedient valet to the owners. So, we've got a league that has a salary cap and non-guaranteed contracts. It's tempting to view the outgrowths of labor-management negotiations as value-neutral and beyond some common range of moral understanding. If those subject to the NFLPA's terminal ankle-grabbing were, say, actuaries, schoolteachers, or lawyers, then perhaps that would be true. But professional football players have dangerous jobs. Whether it's the cumulative harm absorbed or the single, transformative incident—a crack-back block, a blindside sack, or a receiver simply going across the middle—the NFL player's gladiatorial existence means he should be entitled to more safeguards. But the owners won't give it to him, and the union won't fight for it on his behalf.

In spite of those grim possibilities, NFL players have their wages capped, and the concept of "contractual obligations" doesn't extend to their employers. This is precisely the sport that shouldn't countenance such an arrangement. That's because, as intimated above, the game of football at the highest level is uncommonly violent. There are those who have suffered life-altering spinal injuries (Darryl Stingley, Mike Utley, Dennis Byrd, and, more recently, Al Lucas, Kevin Everett, and Cedric Killings, to name just a few), there are those who have died from heatstroke (Korey Stringer), and then there are those whose brain functions have been hopelessly compromised (Andre Waters and Ted Johnson, among countless others). It's that last category of horrifying danger that's particularly troubling. While the neck injuries and heat-related deaths can be callously dismissed as trumped-up anecdotal accounts, the head injuries cannot. In fact, according to a University of North Carolina study conducted 1995-96, more than half of NFL players had been knocked unconscious at least once, and almost a third had suffered three or more concussions. Worse, almost three-fourths of those suffering concussions were given no time to recover from their injuries.

All of this is to say nothing of the epidemic of obesity among interior lineman. In 1990, for instance, 39 NFL players weighed in at 300 pounds of more. By 2005, that figure rose to 338. NFL organizations cherish beefy linemen, and there's a financial incentive for amateur linemen to meet the size standards established by the NFL. But what becomes of these players after they retire, when the 10,000-calorie diet isn't at least partially mitigated by the rigors of the job? Most are luckier than Thomas Herrion, in that they make it to retirement. However, later in life retired NFL linemen suffer heart disease at more than twice the rate of "civilians" of the same age.

Of course, if a player indeed suffers one of these workaday terrors, then his own resources may prove to be more useful than the league's disability plan. That disability plan, based on the demerits, was the subject of recent Congressional inquiry, and Upshaw has been known to threaten critics of it with severe bodily harm. On a certain level, it makes perfect sense—the NFL so routinely damages its employees that it necessarily must neglect some of them in order for its pension and disability systems to remain viable. If that's the case, then the structure itself is to be demonized and bullied, not those who seek redress.

This discussion of sports and their individual moral implications would be incomplete without touching upon the matter of performance-enhancing drugs. On this point, the NFL fails miserably. While baseball has been subject to transcendent levels of ridicule over its supposed problems, it's worth noting that the NFL's vaunted testing program was manifestly inadequate until recent changes took hold. But this does nothing to forgive the NFL's ugly, extensive history when it comes to steroid use, especially as exemplified by the Pittsburgh Steelers dynasty of the '70s. Imagine the spittle-flecked outrage that would follow if one of baseball's signature dynastic franchises had ever similarly been so indulgent of PED abuse.

It's football's sanctioned violence that urges to many players to seek such self-destructive edges over their rivals for roster spots and opponents on the field, and it's also that sanctioned violence that leads to violent tendencies among players, even at the lower levels. It doesn't take an accomplished theorist to surmise that, in the NFL, the scourge of domestic violence is an echo of those early tendencies. While no major sport does an exemplary job of punishing domestic violence, the NFL stands out as a main offender. In 2006, for instance, the Washington Post compiled a non-exhaustive list of NFL player arrests for the year. Of those 41 (!) arrests, five were for various flavors of domestic assault. Those numbers are hardly aberrant. They also don't include some of the more famous incidents (Warren Moon, Lawrence Phillips, Michael Pittman, and, of course, O.J. Simpson).

None of this is meant to imply that baseball is somehow a paragon of responsibility and virtue—it isn't. However, the facts bear out a few straightforward claims. Major League Baseball is less deadly, less physically damaging, less imbalanced in terms of player-owner relations, less socially perilous, and less culpable when it comes to the pervasive "Steroids Age" than is the more popular and more profitable NFL. That the NFL is, in fact, so popular and profitable should be a source of shame to American consumers—ruthlessness may be profitable, but it's not a virtue. It's a blood sport, so lavish it in scorn, not dollars.

Dayn Perry is an author of Baseball Prospectus. You can contact Dayn by clicking here or click here to see Dayn's other articles.