Larry Bowa, Ynks Manager?

The Daily News, The New York Post, Fox News...they all agree on a few things...

1) Little five year old white girls are more important than litte five year old Arab girls
2) George Bush (or Dear Father Leader they like to intone) is actually a misunderstood genius and he is the only one who knows that Islamic fundementalist terr0rism is...bad (frowny face).
3) Global Warming is mythical or simply a natural trend, depending on the weather on any particular given day
4) Joe Torre might soon be fired

If Joe T0rre is fired, the conventional thinking goes, Larry Bowa will stand to step into the shoes of the manager of the New York Ynkees.

This would be wonderful in the best Homaisian sense as the Yankes figure to improve quite a bit beyond their lax start.

While A - Rod figures to retreat back to more non-Bondsian levels of hitting, he's still A-Rod and as much as the Yakees fans don't think he's that great, he is. One guy I met in Las Vegas last week, a big Yakees fan, had this to say: "I still don't trust him."

What is he exactly? A mole sent by the Rangers organization to destroy the Ynkees by not hitting really well against A's and Twins ptching? There are a lot of moles out there...and is the revnge then sending the Twins Sidney Ponson to knock on the door with a little sign that reads "proven veteran" strung around his neck?

Anyway, A-Rod figures to return toward the higher realms of earth, but Bobby Abreu figures to not suck completely, Hughes will contribute by the end of the year, as will Mussina and perhaps they'll wake up, get rid of Doug Meinkeovich (a three run h0merun does not a season make) and start getting something that doesn't resemble the Giambi, A-Rod and the Uselesses tour. The big question is, will they have to give up a really good prospect to get a puzzle piece at the deadline. For $195 million, you should get to keep your farm system.

Whether it's Joe Torre or a Mr. T action doll from 1983 managing, the Ynkees are going to be in the hunt before the season is over, unless they're undone by a multitude of injuries and older players all collectively getting "old" at the same time. And if that happens, it's on Cashman more than it is Torre.

Torre is not flexible, and I don't think he's a great in-game strategist. Too often, the best suited for the seventh and eighth inings are in there in the sixth, and the best guys for mopping up or sitting in the bullpen in a professional manner, are pitching in the seventh and eighth, but having said that, he's well suited for this team. Unlike New York City in general, Joe Torre is good at being patient, he's good at being calm, and he's good at sticking with players, and if you have the players the Yankees tend to have, that's a strength (unless it's Meinke...but that's another story...). Though he's got a bit of that Dusty fear and loathing of rookies. Still, it doesn't seem to be as pronounced a case and he should not, as Derek Jeter pointed out, be on the cusp of losing his job.

But it's never good when your general manager cancels a trip to DR to "be available" or whatever Cashman said about being available and there's a chance that even as I write this that Joe Torre is no more a manager of the Yankees.

And if Larry Bowa takes the position, as the haters assert, then won't it be wonderful to see one of the worst managers in bseball reaping the warm winds of the inevitable Ynkees comeback? They'll all talk about the importance of fire, and "doing the little things," the importance of clutch hitting and "having that extra gear." And while that all might be nice, the truth of the matter is that over the next few seasons, a transition between Joe Torre and say Don Mattingly or Joe Girardi would be much preferable to the sad sideshow that would be Larry Bowa's 2008 campaign.

Anyway, if anybody should be sweated under the lights, it's Cashman, who built a ptching staff more wishcasted than made for the reality of the 162 game schedule. The line-up will hit, but will the pitching pitch? If I'm Joe Torre, I'm a lot more worried about that, and more willing to take some chances, than I am about losing my job.

Losing a job to Larry Bowa is nothing to be ashamed about, it's something to shake your head about and laugh as you finish another cold one with your friends...

My school's dmonic firewall won't let me publish this unless it doesn't know it's about baseball...so if anybody wants to go in and fix it...feel free. Or let it stand as a testament to the stupidity of my school. I fcking hate this sht sometimes.