7:34 PM me: talking to Decker...zzzzzzzzzzzz
7:35 PM Kevin: you knew da risks
excited about the Horror?
me: nope
7:36 PM Kevin: its early yet...
7:38 PM me: they look lucky to me
7:39 PM Kevin: just wait til i have all 7 of my pitchers back
7:42 PM me: box of wine in the mail today...i'm set
7:43 PM Decker to land Wed.
5 minutes
7:48 PM me: Chix kill Rajah and Dillon...nice going
7:49 PM Kevin: i was very pleased
me: you're so mean!
7:50 PM Kevin: YORVIT!
guone
7:51 PM me: Justin Germano? you got him? TOTALLY SUCKED
7:52 PM Kevin: no but he was a chicken for a while last year... prollaby still gots da hives an shit
me: oh, he's got SUCKS
7:53 PM Kevin: aint no pill gonna cure his illlzzzzzz
me: nope
speaking of sucking, Hacking Masser Matt Morris setting records for awfulness
7:54 PM Kevin: very not impressive... but can he keep his job (sucking)?
7:55 PM me: they'll have to pay him $8 mill or something, and then some other idiot GM will pick him up because...he's a proven veteran
Kevin: you need that in the clubhouse
7:56 PM "I feel good," Duchscherer said. "I took six days off after the strain. I started throwing after that, and I haven't felt a thing since I started throwing. I feel perfectly normal."
arrangements are pending
me: will there be a showing? or cremation?
Kevin: closed casket (too gruesome)
7:57 PM (for da kidddzzz)
me: speaking of dead people: Matt Chico...SUCKED
7:58 PM Kevin: shoulda picked him over bulger
me: well, he's still in the majors...
7:59 PM Kevin: although bulger's line as a horror: 1-0, 0.00 era, .000 baaa
baaa = batting average against... ASSHOLE
me: all you have to do is draft about anudder hundred of dem
8:00 PM Kevin: dere ya go
8:01 PM me: Correia dominating again...
8:02 PM didn't get Midwest results...6-0?
8:03 PM Kevin: regrettably, no
me: fuckers
8:05 PM Kevin: positive run diff
me: so we had a reverse-Horrors week
8:06 PM Kevin: horrorz had a positive run diff
8:07 PM horrorz +37 on the year
me: pinch-running for the Phillies: T.J. Bohn
Kevin: never heard of him
me: what are the Monks?
good Lord - Pedro Feliz drew a walk
8:08 PM Kevin: +44
me: there, i run rings round ya
Kevin: that you lack clutch hitting?
8:09 PM me: that and...
gfy
8:10 PM Kevin: just wait til horrror getts back bedard, grandy, and most importantly....
dan johnson
8:11 PM me: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Carlos Diaz: bases loaded double
8:12 PM Kevin: canadiens... les habitants... da rezzzzzidents?
me: Bruntlett's up!
hu now? what? canucks? huuuuuuh?
Kevin: 24th time montreal has elimiliminated bruins from playoffs
8:13 PM me: Bruntlett: OUT!
Kevin: SHOCKING
me: let me make a wild guess here:
hockey?
8:14 PM Kevin: lucky
me: Bruntlett 0-4...now "batting" .170...who needs J-Roll?
8:15 PM Kevin: yes
capitalists still alive
8:19 PM me: - T.J. Bohn in left field
- B. Hawpe safe at first on left fielder T.J. Bohn's fielding error
8:20 PM Kevin: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
me: capitalists will win...flyers always choke in the playoffs
8:21 PM Y. Torrealba flied out to deep center...grab some bench Yorvit
8:23 PM R. Spilborghs struck out looking
he SUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKS
8:25 PM Kevin: he's ryan phokking spillborghzzzz for crissakes
8:26 PM me: i know...PHOKK HIM
DOWNTOWN
PRINT IT
Kevin: PLAYGROUND
8:27 PM me: C@CKS#CKERZ
Micah Bowie in...is dat floodgates i here?
hear, duh
8:28 PM Kevin: build an ark
me: Cookiehead Jenkins singles...
Kevin: not his real name?
8:29 PM me: Coste HBP
real name is Cookiehead, but gies by Geoff
or goes
8:32 PM Werth: DOUBLE
8:34 PM Bohn up - LOOK OUT
8:37 PM D O U B L E 2 R B I
T!
J!!
BOHN!!!
Kevin: stunning
8:38 PM me: Bowie's ERA: now 9.00
Horrors looking at him...
Kevin: he SUCKS
8:39 PM me: you're catching on...
and yet he's on your radar
8:40 PM it's a mystery
like G-O-D
Kevin: now you're catching on
8:41 PM chico: 0-4
8:42 PM he's just resting
he's just pining for the fjords
8:43 PM me: pining for the fee-YORDS? he's STONE DEAD
8:44 PM Chico didn't strike anyone out and he allowed three walks and eight hits. He was clearly struggling to locate his pitches, as evidenced by the bases-loaded walk he issued to Braves pitcher Tim Hudson. After back-to-back disastrous outings, Chico's spot in the rotation could be in jeopardy if he doesn't improve against the Cubs in his next outing.
in other words...AWFUL
8:45 PM Matt Morris was rocked for eight runs in four innings by the Marlins on Monday night. So far we've used "tagged," "pounded," and "rocked" to describe his outings this season. He allowed nine hits in the three innings, and two of them were home runs. This could be a very long season for Morris.
8:46 PM hmmm....Chix looking at him: Noah Lowry had an MRI on Monday after feeling a tingling sensation in his injured forearm.
8:47 PM ?
Phillies CRUSH Rockies
8:48 PM Conor Jackson: .357
8:49 PM Kevin: hate (though he'sstill a smelt)
Chris Young was held out of Sunday's lineup because of flu-like symptoms.
bird flu?
8:50 PM me: can you die from that? then...yes
8:54 PM Kevin: bedtime
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
8:55 PM me: yes
11? early...must be out of fucking merlot
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11? early...must be out of fucking merlot
Yes.
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